I had a real experience with God's spirit and I believe he is active in my life.
I'm happy for you. I don't think that there are many people who have shed more tears and prayed more earnestly than I have or have came closer to committing suicide than I have only to experience absolutely nothing from a nonexistent God. I did survive through perseverance but not because of any God who could not give a shit about my welfare.
But that's not the reason for my being a nonbeliever. Become a critical thinker; question everything. You'll find that the arguments presented by believers are based upon faith. Don't overlook the possibility that your God experience could have been caused by some rational explanation.
My son was a drug addict off and on for many years. Toward the end of his life he told me how he had talked with God. It was real to him.
Once I took a critical look at what was actually printed in the Bible saw the discrep`ancy`s ,the absurdities ,contradictions etc,etc.I came to the conclusion it was a book made up by man of many manuscripts that suited there purpose and rejected many other manuscripts that didn`t suit there purpose and even today their are many Christian religions that have different views as to what books are in their particular Bible.Look at Europe.
And in any case it is not any God who determined what was acceptable and what was not it was imperfect humans who had their own agenda.
IMHO, I think it says something when atheists are just as intent in disproving a god just the same as when a theist is so intent on proving their god. An almighty God would be logically unprovable. Even if a voice boomed from the sky and said, "I am God. Worship me" and it was in understood in every language and every human heard it, it still would not be an absolute proof of God. You could find a million different explanations.
It truly comes down to a personal faith. Some have it, some don't. I happen to have it, and my life is better with it. I could tell an atheist every single personal experience I have had that proves God is real and active in my life, but they would probably just dismiss them all for one "rational" reason to the next. We look for the patterns we want to see. Just the same that some gun nuts look for a reason to dismiss mass shooting as either hoaxes, or false flag operations.
Its simply a human quality to seek confirmation for our own personal beliefs. Atheists seek natural explanations without a conscious cause, I seek natural explanations with a conscious cause. That is the only difference
Hey Dan, make sure to enjoy life, investigate things you never have, keep learning, keep living, travel! My husband and I went to Europe this year. I never thought I would enjoy it so much, because I thought "Hey, one city, one country, they are all just 'thing's".... kind of WT ish....
But, I really enjoyed the history of it all. The architecture, the people, the adventure. We went to London, (for a child abuse prevention convention, that was full of amazing professionals, therapists, lawyers, journalists, victims) and then to Scotland (to see my niece and her family) then to Italy/ Rome and visited the Vatican (no problemo now, I am not a JW anymore w/JW restrictions) and the colosseum.
You will enjoy the broadening of your life. Hugs, cha ching
We have a marriage full of extreme highs and lows.
Appreciated your story. Because JW's emphasize "works" more than "Grace" one finds their worth associated with Pioneering etc
The fact that your life has so many highs and lows could also be the symptom of a disorder like Bi-Polar Manic Depression. If you find these extreme highs and lows happening with you, you might want to seek help. Of course, I can't diagnose that,it could just be a result of being in a messed up belief system among power hungry elders for so long. But take care of yourself and your baby. You have a lot to live for.
I hope you find happiness.
Thanks for your very moving story and welcome.
I was also df'd (apostasy) and went through a difficult divorce. But me and my little boy share the greatest feeling: love; even though his mum tried everything to reduce my time with him and indoctrinate him.
I wish you all the best and recommend to you that you try hard not to lose contact with your daughter and be close to her.
Seems like you and your wife have both been through the mill. This religion chews you up and spits you out. I feel sorry for any child left in the organisation especially girls. As you have expressed it it is a patriarchy and girls have no status and are molded to put the organisation first. Your wife may wake up eventually but she has to make her own choices.
You have time to rebuild and find a new direction in life. It will all be very intense for a while but it will get better. Welcome to the board
IMHO, I think it says something when atheists are just as intent in disproving a god just the same as when a theist is so intent on proving their god.
You still have your JW hat on. I'm not criticizing you. We all went through it when we left the org but I'm ten years ahead of you. If believing brings you comfort, then by all means do so.
When I discovered that I had been duped, I felt ashamed and angry at the same time. It will take a very long time for you to recover; some never do. Just remember... direct your anger to those who deserve it and don't apologize.
We each have our reasons for either "believing" or not. In the final analysis it really isn't too important at the present time. None of us has yet been exposed to the Real Truth About All Things. That time is yet future.
What is most important now is wanting to embrace all that is good. To develop our ability to Love even those we may think of as our "enemies." To eschew all things that are bad. Most of us seem to have a natural desire to do those very things.
In due time we'll come to know the Real Truth. In the meantime, the Heavenly Family is not angry with those who do not yet believe. All are loved and all will be made whole.
If their really was/is a GOD I don`t know what the problem is of not being up front being honest and revealing himself instead of all this subterfuge ?