It doesn’t make Sense

by HappyBlessedFree 21 Replies latest jw experiences

  • HappyBlessedFree

    So my husband and I had a long conversation last night about why I no longer believe. This is our 10th conversation about all the same things which we have been talking about for the last four months.

    He says “You have let yourself be deceived”. I try my best to show him my sincerity in my motives. That I can’t ignore false reasonings, deception, and outright lies.

    He is the type of person that will never admit he’s wrong. Thinks he’s the smartest man around. And admits he struggles with humility. We all have our faults ofcourse, I only mention them to try and figure out what will help him.

    He has not gone to meetings, ever since I stopped going. And I finally asked him “if you still feel it’s the truth then why aren’t you going to meetings.” He says because we are one flesh and we would have to live two separate lives. He compared me to Eve. By the way I never once told him not to go to meetings. So I told him, you should go to meetings if that what your conscience tells you. I said my Christian conscience tells me I can’t follow a false prophet.

    His actions and logic just make no sense. I’ve encouraged him to do his own research. I’m doubtful that he ever will. Why can’t he see the falsehood?

  • Crazyguy2

    Just ask him why a religion started by a guy that predicted Armageddon and then confirmed it by saying he measured the inside of a pyramid is God’s one and true religion??

  • Spiral

    Because he doesn't really want to. And (sorry, don't mean to be offensive) it might be easier to hide behind you, his wife that doesn't want to go. He is "Eve shaming" you.

    I think you should read the article (and share it with him) that thetruelie just posted (look a few posts down in the feed) from an online publication called "Medium". I've always wondered why people buy into that original sin/now we need a sacrifice/meanwhile we all live in shame kind of thinking. This article asks the same question.

    But it's a powerful bit a programming that generations of humans have lived by.

  • Incognigo Montoya
    Incognigo Montoya

    I think spiral is right. He's playing on the fence. He most likely thinks that Jehovah can read his heart, and if he still believes the jw doctrine in his heart, he'll get a pass come judgment day. But he really doesn't want to go, and for that he's got you to hide behind.

    Imo, best thing to do is give him time. Point out the blatant things when they come along. Like child abuse cover up. Or people losing their lives for refusing blood. Or any number of other things that come up, as they will do with the passage of time. Eventually it will all start to sink in and he'll come around.

    It's an extremely difficult thing for some us to see, or allow ourselves to see, because we were brainwashed into ignoring problems, into excusing any little doubt or issue, as satan trying to creep in and separate us from Jehovah. So we learn early on to ignore potential problems and be dismissive. There's an answer for everything, but we're bad if we question. Be patient. The answers will come at the right time. Jehovahs time table, not yours, and of course the GB will be the first to know, and they alone will decide when to share it with the sheeple. Put the blinders back on and just go with it, we have love amongst ourselves...

  • Incognigo Montoya
    Incognigo Montoya

    Also, may I ask, if he were to leave, what does he stand to lose? Friends? Family? This is a huge deal to some, and what keeps them in cognitive dissonance, being a jw apologist, while not adhering to the rigors and activities of actually being a jw.

  • LongHairGal


    I don’t think he really wants to go. I also think it’s like Incognito Montoya says: he hopes he’ll get a pass on judgement day.

    Actually, he’s in an enviable position being married to somebody who is out:..he has a built-in excuse to miss meetings and not be harassed by elders. Any other Witness would be tracked down and annoyed with calls, texts and unwanted visits.

    Give it time and maybe he’ll just get tired of the whole charade.

  • HappyBlessedFree

    Yes Crazyguy, he’s always been obsessed with free masons and the Illuminati. So whe. I first saw Russell’s gravesite (the giant pyramid) , the older books with winged sun disc and others with the pillars. I thought for sure he’d be dumbstruck. When I said it he says “ yeah he was a mason” . Like it’s no big deal! I said WHY would God choose a pagan man like him!

    Why is when I saw all of this it struck me like a ton of bricks!

    He’s been a lackluster witness for 25 years. Never been a MS and at his age should have already been an elder. I just DONT get it!

  • HappyBlessedFree

    You are so right Incognigo!

    We have no Jw family. We both came in as teenagers.

    He has one brother that he’s very close to and is sad to lose.

  • HappyBlessedFree

    Incognigo, the other day he says “well maybe it’s not the truth.”

    Then last night he is completely defending the org. He’s all over the place!

  • HappyBlessedFree

    LongHair, we both have been harassed. Texts, calls, visits.

    I think an an elder is coming to his job and talking to him. Maybe that’s why he’s so back and forth.

    I told him last night, that I haven’t told anyone why I’m not going to meetings . Because the ones I know have tons of JW family, and they would potentially lose them all.

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