JWs shunning other active JWs

by Roger Kirkpatrick 21 Replies latest jw friends

  • Roger Kirkpatrick
    Roger Kirkpatrick

    How many others have noticed how common it is for active JWs to ostracize and shun other active JWs? As far back as I can recall, JWs have had an ongoing problem with cliques within congregations, and special needs talks would be given from time to time to address that trend. But, it seems to me that the practice has become even more pronounced with entire congregations actively shunning other congregations. My older brother--who is an elder--and our younger sister (a devout JW) actively shun one another. I have spoken to other ex-JWs who have commented that their active JW relatives have not spoken to one another for years, even decades. It would appear that, once one begins the practice of shunning, no one is exempt as a target. Before I officially disassociated, I commented on a JW email discussion group that I had been in seven different congregations in my lifetime. Each congregation did things differently from the others, and--without exception--each congregation felt it was the only one doing things correctly. A retired CO who was in that email group responded that I didn't realize just how accurate my observation was! I think it all begins with judging other individuals, then judging other congregations, and it just snowballs until it gets out of control. I also think COs have a lot to do with stirring up contentions between congregations. I'm interested in the observations of others--especially former elders--on this subject. Thanks!

  • Chook

    It's a performance based religion, only the elite religious athletes associate with each other. Will the widowed old sister be invited to the " in club " BBQ, of course not. Birds of a feather flock together, that's why this chook has no place to roost at the Jw temple.

  • ToesUp

    Judging is huge, as is the spiritual competition. "I'm more spiritual. No, I'm more spiritual." We watched this go on for years. I believe once all the smart people make their exit, all that will be left are the pompous ass*oles. They will devour each other. lol I don't miss it!

  • Ray Frankz
    Ray Frankz

    The Org wants exactly this when they refer to that action as "taking note of the wrongdoers" based on Paul's words.

    Also, if a congregation follows strictly all the ruled from the org, the JWs will feel under too much pressure from their elders. Then, if they get to know of another cong that doesn't take the rules soo 'right', they (actually feel jealous for the partial freedom) tend to criticize this less madatory cong, elders etc. in order to they feel that their suffering is justified.

  • UnshackleTheChains

    I remember a Watchtower study a year or so ago and recall how we EVEN need to be careful of our associations within the congregation. I came away from the study feeling paranoid after it. This religion doesn't unite people in love. It judges and divides. They go way over the top to ensure everybody is in line with Watchtower thought control.

    A while ago, an elderly sister told me she doesn't actually really know anyone in the hall. She knows people's names and says hello etc, but doesn't know anyone intimately. She has never socialised very much with members of the congregation and she's been in it for decades. She said her 'worldly' daughter is always coming round to visit her and support her. She gets SFA from the hall. She sounded really hurt when telling me all this and felt sorry for her as clearly been bottling it up. I felt like opening up and saying ' d'ya wanna know what I think'?

  • HiddlesWife

    I agree with all 3 of you! The way Jdubs act plus treat each other is worse than the non-dubs employed at various government/municipal departments and private corporations. A brother and/or sister could be doing his/her all--right straight to the letter and he/she would still be ostracized. Cliques are massive in this organization re: "privileges", race, marital status, financial status, original geographical location (a.k.a., place of birth), lookism (i.e., height, weight, hair color, eye color) and friggin' so on. What a big bunch of hypocrites; and myself and others, whom I 'm close to, notice that the above is getting worse and worse and not better!

  • waton

    Only half of the dying want/have funerals at the hall here. perhaps they do not want their name desecrated by the attendees, and wt propaganda of course.


    JWs shunning other active JWs

    In WatchTower World.

    There`s a,

    "Knife in the Back" For Everyone!

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  • scratchme1010

    How many others have noticed how common it is for active JWs to ostracize and shun other active JWs?

    That's the most off-putting thing about them, their stupid clicks. How I effing hated that attitude back then. Now it just looks pathetic and lame. The psychology of that is quite dysfunctional and petty. They just feed up of each others. They just keep sniffing each other's butts about how cool, righteous and/or happy they are (as if there's such thing as a cool JW). Sad, all they do is using each other to reinforce their covering up their real feelings.

  • steve2

    JW organization has a vested interest in the congregations maintaining their clique-ready mentalities because it makes the rank and file more receptive to instructions about the need to be watchful of who you associate with.

    I'm sure COs' reports about this congregation's cliques and that congregation's cliques are well known higher up the JW command chain. But I don't think it's looked upon as a problem to be solved.

    Indeed, the kind of judgemental outlook we're talking about is a necessary pre-condition for readily obeying orders to shun those who leave and to be wary of those in your midst who may not be as "spiritually" healthy as you.

    Although JW organization would never come right out and say it, keeping the congregation clean is a greater priority than showing love to one another. Love is a little but too blind to human foibles, whereas cleanliness keeps the focus squarely on obedience - very much valued in JW organization.

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