Need advice/opinions about DF Husband who woke up

by Whynot 14 Replies latest social family

  • ttdtt

    I would worry what will happen if he does get reinstated.

    People may love bomb him for a bit, but then when he fades they will abandon him again.

    He will have lost the same set of friends twice.

    That might be worse for him.

  • Whynot

    My husband told me that he doesn't want to be friends with ANY Jdubs even if he goes back. So, after discussing it with him, he has absolutely no need to be reinstated. He's ready to move on. My friends have cut ties with me which I have come to terms with.

    I really don't have any reason to feel attached to the Borg other than the fact that I invested most of my life in it and that my family is still in. I'm certain I need to see a professional to help me let go. Honestly, I just don't believe in it and haven't for a few years.

  • Whynot
    It would be a mistake for him to get reinstated
  • Vanderhoven7

    Why go back to a false prophet organization where love is conditional on faith in and obedience to 8 men in New York?

  • Giordano

    A couple of things Whynot it doesn't sound like either of you want to go back to the JW construct.

    If there is no reason to fade you can end it all and make a clean break by sending in a Disassociate letter. That's it. No one will talk to you after it is announced that you have DAed but it sounds like a good thing.

    If you need a form of worship in your life start visiting churchs in your area not willy nilly but ones that seem kind gentle and appealing....maybe one with a women pastor.

    If an organized religion isn't appealing start searching for your spiritual side by embracing nature. If you have a nice park maybe one with a small creek that has a trail next to it.

    I am not bragging but I have helped two family members leave the JWs. We walked and talked around a small lake and along a stream. There is something about hearing the wind in the trees hearing the stream or seeing the water.

    As we walked..... we talked. I would ask a question and they got to ask me the same question or one they came up with.

    "Whats your best memory of being a JW? What hurt you the most?

    Which JW do you miss? Who did you dislike and why?

    Do you regret not getting more education? If you could remove one JW teaching what would it be?

    These are just simple questions about things that can run deep.

    The new religion for those not interested in being part of a church is volunteering. People are willing to set aside a little time each week to help out. The animal shelter, sporting groups, big brother and sister. It is unlimited.

    And guess meet regularly, share a common interest, a nod hello changes over the weeks to first name greetings to...... hey do you want to join us for a cup of coffee after we finish up.

    At the end of your first year you get to look back and share the learning curve, what you got right, how you made a difference. What you want to do going forward. And if you find yourself looking forward to the new year invite your new friends to a New Years DAY Pot Luck Party. It has worked for us.

    Jehovah's Witnesses? Just a quirky dombsday religion.

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