Mike, I am so sorry. I'm close to my brother who is also inactive and I know what it would do to me and to our relationship if he went back. At this point your brother sounds like someone driven by guilt. Whatever didn't work out in his life is because he left the borg, this is what the WTS wants him to think, total dependence on the borg. Remind him that there are no guarantees that his life would have been any better or worse had he never left the JWs. Also I would avoid saying anything negative about the WTS to him, focus on the love you two share, the memories, the family bond that the WTS is trying to break. If they are dropping love bombs, be a freakin' nuclear weapon - you're his brother, you love him, they can't compete with that. Even if he doesn't respond to you, continue to love him, keep him informed with how good your life is without the WTS and hopefully he'll wake up. Again, I'm so sorry for your pain, be strong, you're in my prayers. - V Sky
Well, my little brother is heading back to the Dark Side...
Mike, that really sucks...
My brother and sister both did the same thing. When life started giving them lemons they thought it was because they left the borg. So they went back and their life still sucks, but now they can at least blame Satan. (barf!) poor fools
so sorry to hear this. Having a close sibling must be a wonderful thing and it is a terrible loss. I hope he comes to his senses quickly.
WOW! What a response to my post! Sorry I took so long to read & reply.
Thanks, everyone! I really appreciate all the support and kind comments. My brother had been inactive for 7 or 8 years - so I thought he was all done with the Dub life. I do think (and many of you mentioned this) that he may have been going through a rough patch in life, and went back to what we grew up with. After attending meetings for "only a month" , as some of you pointed out, I'm sure the elders and the "friends" smothered him at the first sign of his wanting to return. I am sure I'll get an e-mail from him within six months or less, after all the love-bombing has stopped, and realizes what a load of crap they're trying to feed him.
Thanks again to all you! You have made me feel much better about htis situation.
PIERCED ANGEL (Anne) - where have been!?!?!?!? We missed you!
SIMON - what happened to the e-mail function, where I get a message when people reply to my post? Has this been done away with (since the board's updated, new look)? Or am I just a dense git for missing the instructions on how to enable it here? Thanks!
Sorry to hear this.... hugs and take care
Michael, sorry that you have endure such pain; having reached the side of freedom and lucidity, it's difficult to watch people go back. The manipulation and fear (shunning), has great control over the flock.
If Bendrr is reading this, I do believe he experienced something similarly. I am sure he can relate to what you are feeling right now.
Pinoy: Bakit iniisipin mo 'yan tangkol bumalik ng kapatid ni Michael3000? Alam mo, ng buhay salabas sa mga Jehovah's Witnesses, ay talagang masmagaling. Alam ko, umalis ako tagal na (20 years).
Anyways, for clarity (above) I am asking Pinoy why he thinks the way he does, with regards to Michael's brother returning to the JWs. I am telling him, that life outside of the JWs, is much better, and I know because I left 20 years ago.
Michael, one thing is for sure. You'll be there unconditionally for your brother; it will not be the same between you and him, as his thinking will become clouded by WTS thinking/policy.
Conditional vs. Unconditional - we know which one is truly better.
I won't be able to converse with you any longer because of your leaving Jehovah and his teachings.
this is the part that pisses me off, he's not even back in the fold and already judging you.
What exactly are Jehovah's teachings, should of said Watchtower teachings, lets see, UN is ok now, doctrine flip flops are ok, Child abuse is OK, sexual and verbal abuse is ok, women are garbage is OK,
WOW !!! I see the light, maybe we should all go back.
Im sorry to hear about your misfourtune, just stand by your brothers side no matter what, perhaps in time he will come 2 his senses.
I still think we all should figure out who is missing sisters and brothers and Mom's and Dad's and do a big JWD adoption. We are in need of a good Mom and Dad here and any siblingsSheila,
I've been thinking the same thing. I miss my daughters so much, (for those to whom I haven't whined about this yet, it's not a JW thing, it's a "Rosemarie's an idiot " thing), but you know, I have much to offer.
So, anyone for a substitute mom to talk to until you get your own "back"? I am actually a pretty good mom.
>>>> Hopefully the loss will be temporary, as many people here will testify, once you've been out, it's hard to go back and stay back.
Sorry to hear about your little brother. I had the same experience with my little sister about a year ago. Made me feel very sad but it didn't come as a complete shock. With everything I know and feel about the Society, I still feel a longing twinge to go back every once my own damn self.
But what Happyout said above is true. A former ex-JW friend of mine attempted a comeback after being out for a while. He wanted to "help" me, so we met for dinner just before he went "back in." I sat there listening to this dude (about my age) talking about how serious the times were and how crazy he was to ever have left the truth. Johnny was / is one of the most mentally gifted people I've ever known, just brilliant like you wouldn't beleive, and to hear him talk like he was was like being in a sick dream.
Sure enough... he went back, was the toast of his congo in Dallas, the elders put him on the fast track to m.s./elder, and one day after about six months -- out of the blue -- he woke up. I mean really woke up. And left. That was about five years ago.
So there's hope. Keep the door open for your little Bro and a nite light on. I'm sure you will.