Memorial Non-Attendance: The Single Most Impactful TTATT Witness to JW Friends & Family

by AMNESIANO 17 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

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  AMNESIANO

  NOTE: The following is submitted in full recognition of and with compassion and due respect for those who, due to personal circumstance, feel they are unable to employ this powerful strategy.

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  Anyone who has awakened to TTATT and has conscientiously left the organization--especially a once-prominent, highly-regarded, studious true-believer from a celebrated multi-generational tribe of JWs-- after decades of devout, high-profile "serve-us," who continues to put in an annual appearance at the Memorial thoroughly subverts and undermines, by this one act, any hope s/he may entertain that his/her departure will stir family or former friends to question the whole Watchtower bamboozle. By this one concession s/he assigns him-/herself by every single JW to their handy and dismissive purgatory: the "spiritually-weak."

  Nothing blasts a louder, clearer, and more deliberate message to the JWs who personally knew you and to those familiar with your JW bona fides that you are not merely "not making the meetings," "inactive," or "spiritually-weak," but that there is a conscientious reason you have rejected the entire Watchtower Society life than choosing to forego what they know you once believed to be Jehovah's must-attend, one-and-only, holy/sacred event of the year for his people, the Lord's Evening Meal.

  You hand them the very justification they so relish to self-righteously label you as a "submarine Witness" deserving of Jehovah's, and more importantly, their judgement.

  Much more tragically, though, you squander your prize opportunity to nudge thinking ones to seriously ponder the possible reason for your shocking departure. Again, all accomplished without any confrontational unpleasantness.

  Attending the Watchtower's Lord's Evening Meal, even though likely well-intentioned or for many understandably unavoidable at present, is still a colossally misguided go-along-to-get-along concession for anyone whose genuine and sincere intention or desire it is to awaken others to TTATT.

  AMNESIAN

  Captive 7/1972 - 2/2001

  Last Memorial attendance: April 8, 2001
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  slimboyfat

  By this one concession s/he assigns him-/herself by every single JW to their handy and dismissive purgatory: the "spiritually-weak."

  It can be read that way, no doubt. But so can non-attendance too. So spiritually weak they don't even make it to the memorial.

  I tend to think that annual attendance can be a subversive act too. It can be intended and interpreted as a signal that you simply don't take the whole thing very seriously. A reminder to those who attend regularly that it's perfectly possible to get on with your life without the drudgery of regular attendance at the Kingdom Hall. I know that's sort of what crossed my mind as a believer when I saw the same inactive people turn up for just the memorial year after year.
  
  
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  AMNESIANO

  "It can be intended and interpreted as a signal that you simply don't take the whole thing very seriously."

  I like this point and think it quite valid for those wishing to make no more than a casual impression. For those, however, fervent to awaken others to the egregious crimes of the WBTS, my personal experience evidences non-attendance to be the most effective.

  AMNESIAN

  Captive 7/1972 - 2/2001
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  slimboyfat

  For it to be a bold statement you would probably need to come out and say exactly why you are not attending. If you don't say anything JWs are liable to draw their own, self-serving conclusions: they are spiritually weak/practising sin/ashamed to show their face or whatever.
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  kairos

  Do they pass the emblems to the DF'd section or is it just nods from the passers to the section and a look of shame and heads hung down by the DF'd...?

  If they pass them- eat and drink!
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  AMNESIANO

  One does not, indeed need not, come right out and say anything-- that is, unless and until approached. It's the non-attendance that finally moved others, after years, to muster the courage to contact me as to my reason. It is then the opportunity to speak, to the extent one strategically chooses, is afforded, without the appearance or accusation of activism or inciting dissension.

  Btw, I couple this strategy with making it a point to consistently attend the funeral services at the KH of all those for whom I had affection in order to allay any gossip or suspicion that I am in hiding for whatever reason. Trust me, it works magnificently in confounding and prompting inquiry as to my motivations!

  I can only speak to the success of my own and nearby experiences. Obviously YMMV.

  AMNESIAN

  Captive 7/1972 - 2/2001
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  problemaddict 2

  Someone that I know that used to attend asked me when he found out I didn't go anymore this exact question.

  "So are you a 'go to the memorial' ex JW, or no memorial JW". His question was interesting to me, because the assumption on his part and I believe many others is that if you attend the memorial, DEEP DOWN you still feel the way you used to.

  Since I heard that question....I no longer attend memorial. I am hoping my wife stays home this year for the first time.
  
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  AMNESIANO

  Problemaddict, you have hit the nail on its head! There you have put it succinctly.

  AMNESIAN

  Captive 7/1972 - 2/2001
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  Unprodigal Daughter

  I would never go now but I'll admit that, as a JW, there was something a little disconcerting about having the hall taken over once a year by ex-jw's, faders, non-jw relatives, unbelieving husbands. All people happy living their own free lives, coming along to humour us, chatting amoungst themselves. It definitely had a bit of an effect.
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  stuckinarut2

  Great opening post!

  I agree sincerely!

  It certainly creates "cognitive dissonance" in the minds of once close "friends" as they try to reconcile why their former "spiritually strong" associate has taken the dignified steps they have...of cutting off association.

  It makes them ask themselves "why would so and so who was SO STRONG take such a drastic step?"

  Perhaps they will also be prompted to research facts....