Why do ex-JW's talk so much about being ex-JW's?

by Sour Grapes 28 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

  • nicolaou

    Also, consider that you are asking your question on an exJW discussion forum. It would, of course, appear that all exJWs talk about is their exJwism but I suspect the truth is that the vast majority of former JW'S have no interest in online debates, Reddit, FB groups etc.

    I think you may be experiencing a form of confirmation bias.

  • snugglebunny

    If you've been a dub for any length of time, that's now a part of your identity. People will always talk about major experiences in their lives. Unless they're totally anal or secretive.

  • 2+2=5

    If you were born and raised a JW, I’m sure you could understand...

    It’s not fucking normal.

  • Diogenesister
    have never heard anyone say that I was an ex-Catholic or an ex-Lutheran or an ex-Baptist. They just stop going to their church and don't talk about it.

    Putting it bluntly, because they were not suffering under undue influence in their lives. They did not have their autonomy restricted by an organization that claimed to love them but in actual fact was extremely damaging within every aspect of their lives.

    In other words, they weren't in a cult.

  • Fred Franztone
    Fred Franztone

    I never do outside of this site, and I only do it here because that's what this site is specifically geared towards. Most who know me in real life have no idea that I was raised as a JW, and they never will. I also never talk about the religion with my PIMI family, who know not to bring it up when I visit them.

  • Still Totally ADD
    Still Totally ADD

    I feel being in the cult is like being in a coma for a long time. You are unable to do anything outside your bed. The doctor and nurses have total control over you. You can't talk to anyone even though you may be able to hear and understand what is being said. You are totally cut off from all society. All you know is what goes on in the 4 walls around you.

    Then after a long time in that coma you wakeup. You are able to think and speak for yourself. No one is controlling every aspect of your life anymore. But you find out how many years of life was wasted. How being on your own is difficult dealing with normal living. Then depression, anger and frustration sets in. All you can talk about is the unique events you went through. This web site is like a life preserver for all of us. Helping us get over the coma we were all in. Good luck to all who are in recovery and Take care. Still Totally ADD

  • scratchme1010

    Is it because we were in the cult Watchtower Compound that we talk about being ex-JW's when we stop being active? I have never heard anyone say that I was an ex-Catholic or an ex-Lutheran or an ex-Baptist. They just stop going to their church and don't talk about it.

    Years after not stepping inside a Kingdom Hell, many of us still have to talk about being ex-JW's. Were we so damaged that we just can't help ourselves or is it because we lost so many years of our lives that we are still pissed off about it?

    Sour Grapes

    Not sure who you are talking about. I only talk about being an ex-JW in this forum, nowhere else, unless rarely they come up in a conversation, and that's a rarity.

    And how do you expect people like me, born in, to talk about our childhood, or our upbringing, or anything in our live without mentioning that organization?

    Also, yes, the experience in the JWs was a traumatic one.

    May I ask, does it bother you? Why are you questioning it? Is that a bad thing? And why does it have to be about being damaged? And even if it is, people who have been submitted to a traumatic experience deserve their time and space to deal with it, so is there a problem with that?

  • OneEyedJoe

    Great question. You've inspired me to go on a car forum I frequent and ask those guys why they're always talking about cars.

  • Sour Grapes
    Sour Grapes

    I really appreciate the comments in response to my question. Annon said, "The greater the control the greater the rebellion." And Stuck mentioned that we just can't walk away from the cult without repercussions which motivates us to contribute to this forum.

    I think there are multiple reasons why ex-JW's talk about our past life's. I have not been inside a Kingdom Hell for over a year and I am now getting phone calls from elders to please call them back they want to "encourage" me. You just can't walk away they won't let you. Probably one reason is due to having a publisher card on record that is looked at several times a year. The circuit overseer will grill the elders about have you contacted Sour Grapes? Why did he stop coming to meetings and not reporting time? They have to have answers to his questions. You can run but you can't hide.

  • ToesUp

    This forum has been kinda like a therapy for me. It has helped me feel like I am not the only one going through all this. Thank you everyone!!!

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