There are only 4 ways to leave the Jehovah's Witnesses

by new boy 27 Replies latest jw friends

  • new boy
    new boy

    There are only four ways of leaving the Jehovah’s Witnesses. So there are four ways that could lead to shunning. I say “could” because options three and four has some loopholes.

    1. You are “disfellowshipped.” You commit some kind of sin in the eyes of church. For example you commit “Immorality” meaning you have sex before you are married or you are married and have sex with someone besides your spouse. There are other sins you could commit but these are by far the most popular. You meet with three elders in the local congregation. If they feel you are not repentant enough for your sins, the will expel you from the congregation. Sometimes even if you are repentant enough, they will still expel you anyway. They will do this to make an example of you to others. Or they just don’t like you. It’s a “good old boy country club” and sometimes favoritism comes into play. You could be disfellowedshipped in one Kingdom hall and just get a slap on the wrist in another for the same offence.

    2. You “disassociate” yourself. You send a letter to the local congregation and resign your membership.

    If you do the first or second option will be definitely be shunned. You can never again have ANY contact with any of your Jehovah’s Witnesses friends or family. You are dead to them.

    3. So you don’t want to do option one or two. In recent years a new way to leave the Witnesses has become popular. It’s call “fading.” This is a tricky one. It’s done by people who don’t want to make a complete break from the occult. Usually because of family members, the thought of not ever talking with their parents, children, siblings and loved ones is more than they can bear. It works just like it sounds. You move away from them slowly. Many times this requires an actual move to a new town or state. You might even tell your family and friends that you are still an active witness but in reality you have moved on to a new life. Others have called this “a double life” This phrase has been coined to describe mostly younger ones, teenagers and young adults who have two different lives. These are kids who are trying to keep their parents happy and will pretend to be a good witness by going to the meetings and out in field service. However on the weekends they will “party down” and act like “worldly” people. Whether you are a “double lifer” or a “fader” the results can be disastrous if caught. You could end up in the “back room” with the three elders telling them your story. This rarely goes well.

    4. The fourth and final option is death. For many who couldn’t make the choice from the first three options, have chosen this one. Yes, you can break free with suicide. There was a time when I even considered this option myself. I have known at least a half dozen people who felt this was their only option to leave. As I have said earlier, I personally have contributed to at least two people choosing this way out. Yes, even dead people can be shunned. Many witnesses have boycotted their family member’s funerals. So for them there can be do forgiveness even after your death. My mother wouldn’t let my father go to his father’s funeral because it was inside a Catholic church. As Bob Dylan once said “Some of us are prisoners and some of us are guards.”

  • scratchme1010

    Yes, you can break free with suicide.

    Please add "Not recommended".

  • Dis-Member

    5. Just walk out never to go back and be completely left alone with a clean slate forever like you were never there in the first place because you have dirt on elders and a bunch of dodgy brothers and sisters and the fallout will be just to messy for them to deal with.


  • alanv

    Fading doesnt need to be a tricky one. You just gradually do less and less, and when the elders come knocking you just say you have some personal issues you are dealing with, and you will contact them if you need to in the future. Certainly no need to move. Unless you do some serious sin that they get to hear about, you just carry on with your new found freedom, and enjoy the rest of your life.

  • Chook

    There may be 4 way to leave but they all have consequences. This church is like the mafia ,you can only leave in a box.

  • waton

    2a) you takes sides in the affairs of the "world" and for legal/publicity reasons, wt does not dare to disfellowship you, they declare that you disassociated yourself. really

    1a) disfellowshipping by another name.

  • dozy

    The "Truth" is like the Hotel California - "you can check out any time you want , but you can never leave".

    Even with a successful fade , there is always the risk that many years later you will do something that reaches the attention of the elders. It can be something as innocuous as putting up a Xmas tree , posting on Facebook wishing someone a happy birthday or "liking" a Youtube video. Many examples here of people who suddenly , out of the blue , had elders phoning up or knocking at their door.

  • hoser

    Drop off the key Lee and set yourself free

  • Ucantnome

    I left and didn't use any of your four ways

  • Nicholaus Kopernicus
    Nicholaus Kopernicus

    I'm engaged in option 3. I only attend meetings occasionally. I no longer submit reports. I don' t think a BoE would haul me in for a discussion. They tried that and I told them: "Jehovah is my shepherd. I shall lack nothing".(Ps 23:1)

    Additionally, in Britain you are protected by harassment and stalking legislation and by data protection legislation.

    Should I be wrong and the BoE try to engage me against my wishes I would point out "Caesar's Law" to them. In the remote likelihood that I end up disfellowshipped then I'd no longer have any motivation to be a good chap and remain quiet. I'd give them repeated lessons on the practical application of wrath!

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