Do You Remember The First Time You Looked At "Apostate" Material?

by minimus 32 Replies latest jw friends

  • minimus

    I was always fascinated by it. As a kid, I used to go to the local library and secretly read books by so called apostates. Later, I would sneak into Christian book stores and quickly buy a book or two.

    Thank God we got the Internet. That was the nail in the coffin.👍👍

  • Finkelstein

    Yes, it was an Awake magazine back in the 70's .

    Come to think about it much of the literature published by the WTS. is apostate against God's guidance and instructions written in the bible..

  • slimboyfat
  • OneEyedJoe

    My very first bit of apostate material was a small tri-fold tract that someone gave me and a friend when we were out recruiting one saturday. This was about 15 years ago, I'd say. One of the first times the two of us were allowed to go to the door without parental supervision. I still clearly recall showing it to his parents (we didn't read it by ourselves) after service was over. They read it to us and we all had a good laugh at all the insane lies they expected us to believe. Things like CTR sold his mensware business and made what would be milions in today's money to fund the WTS printing shop. I recall that there was something in there about miracle wheat, 1886, 1914, 1925 as well.

    Then I didn't look at apostate information until 3-4 years ago. The next time I saw apostate stuff was on jwleaks about child abuse while I was trying to find a KM. That didn't really have an impact either though. I think the 100 year countdown on that site was probably the most impactful wasn't until I was 90% sure that I was in a cult that I really seriously looked at anything online.

  • TheListener

    Yes. Once as a kid and I spent weeks justifying why it was wrong and stupid.

    Then sick, sweaty, dizzy and freaked out as an adult who realized I may have been duped my entire adult life (up to that moment) I cautiously, so so nervous googled jehovah witness 607 and BOOM the floodgates opened and I didn't stop reading, studying and making notes until my life was changed forever.

    I'm so glad to be free and have free kids.

  • Bonsai

    I accidentally stumbled on this site 3 or 4 years ago. The first poster I saw had the avatar "Satanus" and I freaked out thinking I wouldn't touch this site with a ten foot pole. Well, stuff happened later and...and here I am!

    Whatever happened to Satanus anyway? Hopefully he changed his user name to something a little less... provocative?

  • blondie

    Barbara Grizutti's book in high school

    The Finished Mystery book published after CTR died (what a hoot)

    But I wasn't really convinced until I read Crisis of Conscience (thanks to being able to order books off the internet and received discreetly)

    Mostly the WTS older publications and current convinced...hung by their own words

  • Village Idiot
    Village Idiot

    The first time was right after I got baptized. It was at a district assembly and I was riding on a school bus full of JWs. As we were leaving there was a group of people waving literature and trying to get the bus to stop. The driver stopped out of curiosity to see what they were doing. I reached out through the window of the bus as the group was eager to hand me what appeared to be a Watchtower. Upon closer look at the look alike tract I saw that the title was "Not the Watchtower". It was full of quotations from the real Watchtower heavily underlined to emphasize the point. I didn't really read it but it was my first experience with anti-cult evangelicals who used to go to our assemblies.

    The passengers quickly figured out that it was apostate material and were excitedly urging me not to read it.

    Sometime years later I went to a 'Christian' bookstore and bought William Schnell's 30 Years a Watchtower Slave. I remember being so afraid of it that I ripped off the front covers and hid it even though I was living with my mother who was not a JW. I wasn't too impressed by that book but it was my first careful look inside of the "opposition".

  • MarkofCane

    The first time was about 5 yrs ago accidentally stumbled on this site, I thought it was a legitimate pro-witness forum I just looked around and saw "Punkofnice" avatar and freaked out, I thought I just seen my first demon. I quickly exited out and prayed to God for forgiveness. I thought "the brothers warned me about this stuff, their so tricky, trying to make it look like a JW site".

    Didn't return until much later, with a different mind set, looking for answers. Now here I am, part of what I feared. If you would of told me I would be part of this apostate community. I would of said "your absolutely crazy and offensive to even think that". Things are never what they seam are they. What we live are lives for, breath for and are ready to die for is so fleeting.


  • new boy
    new boy
    I never did until after I left. Maybe that's is why it took me 52 years to get out.

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