by midnight 15 Replies latest jw friends

  • midnight

    Hi I am posting for the first time although I've been looking for a few years , I was born into a witness family left when I was 12 with my parents went back at 22 pioneered became ms started to have major doubts around 2002 when there was a lot of talk about blood fractions etc have been hit and miss since I'm extremely mentally confused as to wether or not this really is Jehovah's earthly organisation , I find life hard facing up to mortality etc not having the new system hope , what nailed your decision to leave ? How did you cope with world problems on news etc ? How did you fill the void ? Thanks

  • notsurewheretogo

    Hey midnight...glad you posted.

    First off I would recommend that you do research, jwfacts.com, threads on here and other sites to really clarify your belief in that if the JW's are God's organisation. If you are on the fence with that, whether you are unsure or not I found makes life hard.

    As soon as I fully convinced through fact and reason that there is no way it can be God's organisation then life becomes much more enjoyable.

    The prospect of dying, world news etc is tough at the start but it goes away because you realize you can really enjoy your life now, fill the void with things you like, travelling, hobbies, friends and family etc.

    But given where you are I would advise you really sort out in your head whether it is God's organisation, I can tell you it is not but you need to come to that conclusion yourself and then it is like a veil being lifted.

    A book that really helped me was Captives to a Concept by Don Cameron...you can get it in PDF format off the internet, it really was wonderful in helping me see that God is not using the JW's.

    And welcome, there are a good bunch of exjw's here who have all gone through this process, we can all help each other.

  • jaydee
  • never a jw
    never a jw

    I have been an agnostic or atheist since my early teenage years, but for 20 years I found your religion a good one, simply because the members (lots of family and friends in) were good and nice people. My view took an 180 degree turn when I started researching, rather deeply, your religion, the history of Christianity, history of Christianity in the U.S., ancient history in the near East, Judaism. I concluded that any form of Christianity is utter bullshit, ranging from mild cults like the Catholics to the most extreme, high control and dangerous cults of death like the JW's. If you still believe in the Bible, then critically read the best books, Ecclesiastes and Job. They will bring some light into reality and help you to make better decisions. Today my favorite pass time is studying the Bible from an academic point of view. Much, much better than studying it under a control a cult.

  • stillin

    Midnight, welcome! Yes, there IS a void after leaving this worldwide social group. I think of it as being similar to investing. If you begin to invest at an early age, as you get older things will really begin to blossom. Having friends is one aspect. There's no friend like an old friend.

    What you put into your head works that way too. Take an objective look at what is "on the table" with this organization. If you compare that with the myriad of other interests out there, you may conclude that there are some very rewarding hobbies, intellectual pursuits, arts, musical talents, etc. that "fit" you a lot better than just giving up and being a drone in the WT organization.

    Friends will come, but not as easily when you are older. I wish you the best!

  • atomant

    And readCRISIS of CONSCIENCE RAYMOND FRANZ Former member of the Governing Body of Jehovah’s witnesses .Real eye opener as to the inner workings of this cult religion.

  • Half banana
    Half banana

    Hi Midnight and welcome to posting here!

    Apart from children who were indoctrinated from birth who believed that they would live forever, the whole of humanity have individually had to come to terms with the worst thing in the world:- the fact that they will die.

    So Midnight you are hardly alone! Religion clearly serves as a sandpit in which ostrich-like, we can bury our heads and forget reality. The consequence of waking up to the religious lie is that life, our life, is suddenly much more precious and not to be thrown away on unprovable hopes of a fabled paradise, however alluring the thought is.

    When I woke up, I found that planet Earth became infinitely more beautiful than I saw it as a JW. The JW beliefs create a jaded and misanthropic cast on everything and the contrast comes about by understanding that the physical world evolved, it could not be magically created by some invisible spirit who had to be even more powerful than the cosmos he or it created.

    Do start with the JW Facts website and read Crisis of Conscience, then you can start learning about real life outside of the cult mentality. I recommend taking higher education courses as a serious antidote to Watchtower indoctrination.

    All the best as you escape their clutches and look forward to a happier, more grounded reality.

  • Giles Gray
    Giles Gray

    Hello Midnight.

    The disorientation and stress you are feeling at the moment is a totally natural part of the process of waking up from being a JW, even though it won't feel like it right now.

    The answers to your questions will come in time. This time next year you will be in a much better place.

    In the mean time you will need to do a lot of reading and processing. Waking up from being a JW is a huge shock. Healing from the resulting hurt is vital and happens at its own pace.

    Reconciliation to your new circumstances of mortality, world problems, etc, is a personal thing. What works for one person might not work for another. Right now might not be the best time to address such issues. Ridding yourself of indocrination might be a better thing to focus on.

    Getting support is probably the most important thing you need right now, so making friends with people who are going through, or have gone through the same thing is very important.

    I hope it all works out well for you.

    Keep posting.

  • tor1500

    Hi Midnight,

    Welcome. I'm a still in witness...new I might add too. You will get a lot of good information from this forum & others as well that tell the truth about the truth.

    I don't believe this is God's org. I don't believe God is partial in that way because humans have a problem with pride & boasting. So when I made that decision it wasn't God's org. I began to relax a bit. I feel many witnesses are witnesses for many reasons & one is being a part of God's org. is a badge of honor. The question if it wasn't would some of them still be there. When you were in what was your motivation, did you believe you were in God's org. or was it that you felt superior to others. I feel if you want to serve God, you do it because you LOVE him. Not because some human has said God chose us....& it's the truth...the truth is not a doctrine or an organization but the truth is in you Midnight....the bible is a mirror of who you really are, not who you are at the hall. The scriptures reveal the truth about you. Churches, synagogues & other places of worship only have pieces of the puzzle, you have to put it together yourself.

    I'm trying to get to your core of who you really are....dig deep into yourself. Do you Love God? Do you think God is the God that the JW's portray, some type of God that we obey silently, like an Idol. God wants us to interact with him...we see that from the OT...The Jews spoke to God, even if they were wrong.

    God loves us unconditionally, he doesn't care what denomination you are. When it's time for you to account for yourself..being a JW isn't a password. It's what type of person you were here on earth. So you say, if you leave how could you fill the gap....ever thought of giving back without counting time ? The world is full places where you CAN SERVE...To serve someone else & to give of yourself makes one come out of themselves. You could go to a hospital & volunteer...read to the elderly, hold a child that had an addictive parent, there is so much in a hospital & or nursing home you could do. Soup kitchen, helping homeless, helping those who have drug problems, again, so much to do...but Midnight, you will be doing this for God and mankind...& guess what? This is not about counting time. In this life, you will serve somebody.

    My take on religion...when man tells you what God wants, it's usually what they want. The issue of your mortality, this is something no one knows .....can you live with that? Does the fact that we may not come back scare you, well Midnight, join the rest of the world...Death is a scary thing...we can't imagine that our magnificent self will never come back. Think about this nobody ever came back to tell us. That is one of the mysteries of life we all have to deal with. JW's just want to tie it all up in a bow & say, don't worry, you'll come back.

    Midnight, you cannot exist in this world without strength. Being a witness makes you weak to deal with everyday life, they stick their heads in the sand & just wait, but when the tough times come they can't handle it so they say, they'll be glad when the new system comes. Midnight, witnesses will say that with the least inconvenience they experience...don't let them have to wait on line or the waitress took too long, or if they have to pay a bill. This life we live now takes Faith and each time we go through something it makes us stronger, one can't be stronger if anytime a little inconvenience arises, they whine & call for a new system. Do you want to be strong to make it until the new system if it in deed happen ?

    You ask how to fill the void....again I say do something for others that you don't have to count. Many of witness still don't know that the ransom is a gift & you don't have to work for it. This may be hard for you, some witnesses have not forgiven themselves so they feel going out preaching they can work their guilt off. Again, I'm trying to appeal to your inner most self. Why were you a witness, how did you treat people who were not a witness, you see if you don't address these things, you won't be a witness anymore but you'll still have traits of being superior.

    Don't be afraid of life...this is all we have for now...The bible is to help one through life & it shows how we are to treat one another. The org. wants folks to be morally clean, but what I find, that this makes one bitter. Have you noticed some of the witnesses are bitter ? Notice who witnesses are...do you want to be a judgmental person or a person like Jesus. He didn't belong to an org. he preached to everyone, he helped & healed everyone, he touched lepers, all this & he knew he was sent to die, did Jesus have an issue with mortality, how did Jesus cope with what was going on in his day. Did he join a group who only stuck with each other...Midnight, read the Greek scriptures & read them for what they are, leave the JW literature alone...The bible is really a simple book, but the hard part is to do it.

    Yes, get help, but when you do take the help....in the end, the bible is what you follow, not man, isn't it in the bible that man cannot direct his own steps ?

    I think I wrote too much, but I hope I gave you something to think about...SERVE SOMEONE, NOT YOURSELF.


  • DesirousOfChange

    WOW! You've already got some GREAT replies!

    Welcome to our Motley Crew of mentally diseased folks here!

    I didn't get to the point you are at until I was in my 50s. Although you don't exactly state your age, I think you're much younger and have much more yet ahead in your life. Still, it is a tough awakening.

    Thanks to reviewing WT literature (with its flip-flops, misquotes, re-writing of history, and blatant lies), sites like JWFacts, COC, etc I now know WTS/GB are NOT anything special to God. They aren't being used by Him for any special purpose. However they are using all the sincere, gullible rank & file JWs who are under their control. (God needs your money! ~ George Carlin)

    The biggest hurdle for me was realizing that all of the injustice in the world is not going to be rectified by Jehovah. Injustice will just always be there. The big and powerful will continue to squash or eat the lowly and weak. The JW fairy tale is better, but fairy tales are not reality. How to deal with it? Try not to be one of the "weak and lowly" or learn how to run like hell!

    Good luck to you in your pursuit of The Real Life!

    The greatest revenge is living a happy & successful life!

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