Be careful what you wish for (in case you want to wake up your spouse)

by nevaagain 38 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  Perry

  The watchower positions itself as a savior by high-jacking the promises of the new-covenant, while at the same time promising an end to accountability at death with non existence as a worst case scenario.

  When people jettisone the Watchtower, they are still left with the worldview that the watchtower installed, no accountability at death & an annihilation of their soul.

  Someone once said that character is proved by what you do when no one else is around.

  We learned little character and much "pretending" as witnesses. Most of us were academy award winner actors.

  Now, without a stage she's not pretending anymore and the inner person is peeking out.

  Through Christ, God offers a new spirit that cannot sin. When followed, the pretending disappears, and a much more authentic life ensues after redemption. One of the first things a person should do when they leave a bible cult is to put forth some effort to find out what they want to do with Jesus.

  Jesus is always the best answer for ___________(fill in blank)___________ .
• 

  stillin

  I don't think of knowing TTATT as a ticket to not being a decent human being. Honesty is still (usually) the best course. Kindness rocks! Mutual respect should be cultivated, with or without one of you being an active Witness.

  I know what you mean about the convenience of ready-made friends and associates if you are a Witness who has moved to another city. That part is pretty cool. Too bad about the rest of it.
• 

  TheListener

  Damn DJS you are cold!

  Sorry to hear about this Nevaagain. I hope you both get through this with as little stress as possible.
• 

  LV101

  DJS - Ahh, thanks for definition. I'm so used to trying to figure out the cult's acronyms/abbreviations, etc., on here.
• 

  DJS

  TheListener,

  I'm actually a softie, but he got himself in this mess. Ignoring that and playing nice by treating him like a complete victim serves no purpose, least of all in assisting neva. There is of course always 2 sides to every story. All we know is what neva told us and we can glean from his tenure on this site, the length of time he has known the cult is a cult and the kinds of crap he states he is putting up with from the WWOTE, all the while letting her emasculate him and blame shift all of her issues to him.

  That makes me want to projectile vomit. The only thing worse is the placating, enabling, victimizing play nice crowd that feeds into the very reasons neva is in this mess in the first place. That really makes me want to projectile vomit.
• 

  millie210

  after reading this thread I have a new saying...

  Finding out TTATT doesnt change character, it reveals it.
• 

  Doubtfully Yours

  DJS and all others,

  Some men/women like to be cheated on because they enjoy the reconciliation phase. It is really sick.

  This guy sounds like some piece of work.

  DY
• 

  corruptgirl

  Disposable, I agree with you no need for name calling here....not helpful. Anyways, back to the main issue here.... i think your wife should be thankful you helped her see the ttatt....i know I am! I can now live my life freely! It seems she wants to live it a little too free and that's not ok. What she's doing is not ok and I fear she might be cheating. Everyone reacts in a different way when woken up, and our true colors start to show. No you shouldn't have gotten into a marriage with a jw knowing ttatt because u initially lied to her and that's also not ok.....but I do understand that it can be hard to leave especially when you've been in it all your life and you don't want to loose your loved ones,and it could definitely be convenient when moving to a new city. All that said, you've both made mistakes along the way but don't let her treat u like this. She cannot blame u, she needs to blame the WT. Also, she needs to start acting like a wife or it's you who needs to start throwing around ultimatums!.... Sorry I don't try to be a marriage counselor but I really think she might be cheating. 😞
• 

  Mickey mouse

  I've seen this happen a couple of times before here. There was a nice guy who got his wife out only for her to go off the rails and leave him. But who knows whether they would have stayed together or been happy if they stayed witnesses? I recall be eventually met someone else and was happy. It's going to bug me now that I can't remember his name!