Funny stuff. The part about the Whole Silly Flood Story is good.
http://www.rice.edu/armadillo/Sciacademy/riggins/things.htm#cards
Things Creationists Hate
by reubenfine 13 Replies latest jw friends
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reubenfine
The Apostle Paul
Dustin Huwe points out that in 1 Timothy 1:4 and Titus 3:9, Paul advises us to ignore "fables and endless genealogies." The genealogies of Gen 10, Chr 1-9, Mt 1, and Lk 3 are one of the key ways creatonists have 'proved' the Earth to be about 6,000 years old.
Secondly, in Titus 1:14, Paul tells us to ignore Jewish fables. Wouldn't that mean most of the Old Testament, if not all of Genesis?LOL
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reubenfine
Yes, evil provable facts. Those are the worst!
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hooberus
Size of the Earth
...has obviously expanded greatly since Noah's day, when he could, in a short period, collect pairs of all animals and birds from all over the world, without the benefit of modern air transport. Then after the Flood, the critters all had to migrate, at the double-quick, to their present habitats in Tasmania, the Galapagos, the coasts of Antarctica, Patagonia, the American Southwest, or wherever. It's clear the Earth was no more than a few hundred miles across, probably flat, and with no inconvenient oceans like, say, the Pacific.
Comments like this make me wonder if the author of the "Whole Silly Flood Story" arcticle has even carefully studied Genesis or creation science. According to Genesis Noah did not collect the animals.
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rem
According to Genesis Noah did not collect the animals.
Then how did the cute little koala's survive the flood?
Genesis 6:17-19
"Behold, I, R150 even I am bringing the flood of water upon the earth, to destroy all flesh in which is the breath of life, from under heaven; everything that is on the earth shall perish. 18 "But I will establish My R151 covenant with you; and you R152 shall enter the ark--you and your sons and your wife, and your sons' wives with you. 19 " R153 And of every living thing of all flesh, you shall bring two of every {kind} into the ark, to keep {them} alive with you; they shall be male and female.
Who collected the animals? Oh, yeah. Noah did:
Genesis 6:22
22 Thus R156 Noah did; according to all that God had commanded him, so he did.
rem
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hooberus
Deep-sea Fish
One of the ways that creationists try to weasel out of the volume of water needed for Noah`s Flood is to say that the Earth was much flatter then--the oceans were shallow, and the mountains were more like low hills. Therefore, much less water was required to flood the entire planet. All the mountains were raised after the Flood (or towards the end of it), and the oceans became deeper, allowing the water to drain off (creating the Grand Canyon in the process). By the way, none of this nonsense is in the Bible; I'm constantly amazed by the additions creationists insist on adding to the Genesis myth in attempts to make it more believable--while never ceasing to parrot the mantra "the Bible is perfect." This particular Genesis "improvement" raises two embarrassing questions:
Psalm 104 ASV
104:5 Who laid the foundations of the earth, That it should not be moved for ever.
104:6 Thou coveredst it with the deep as with a vesture; The waters stood above the mountains.
104:7 At thy rebuke they fled; At the voice of thy thunder they hasted away
104:8 (The mountains rose, the valleys sank down) Unto the place which thou hadst founded for them.
104:9 Thou hast set a bound that they may not pass over; That they turn not again to cover the earth. -
hooberus
Genesis Chapter 6
17: And, behold, I, even I, do bring a flood of waters upon the earth, to destroy all flesh, wherein is the breath of life, from under heaven; and every thing that is in the earth shall die.
18: But with thee will I establish my covenant; and thou shalt come into the ark, thou, and thy sons, and thy wife, and thy sons' wives with thee.
19: And of every living thing of all flesh, two of every sort shalt thou bring into the ark, to keep them alive with thee; they shall be male and female.
20: Of fowls after their kind, and of cattle after their kind, of every creeping thing of the earth after his kind, two of every sort shall come unto thee, to keep them alive.
21: And take thou unto thee of all food that is eaten, and thou shalt gather it to thee; and it shall be for food for thee, and for them.
22: Thus did Noah; according to all that God commanded him, so did he. -
rem
LOL, I guess I need to get some glasses. But it is pretty hilarious to think of two koala bears trekking accross country... er continents to get to the ark. Then after the flood, they had to make the long trek back to Australia... presumably on a row boat.
rem
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logansrun
Hooberus --
Your comments go great with my Jack Daniels. Thanks.
Bradley