The more I read the board , the more I come to appreciate that people are always going to be who they are. Those that complained in the past will always be complainers today. Those that didn't have a clue about life while Witnesses are probably still going to be clueless as exes. Those that felt they were always being mistreated unfairly in a congregation will still feel that life gives them a bum deal. Those that searched for the real meaning of life may tend to still be idealists a decade from now. Those that tried to act in a fair way will still be fair minded. Those that rushed to judgment will be usually ones not giving the benefit of the doubt. This is not to say that people CAN'T change. But typically, people will be the same---- good or bad.
People are People
by minimus 41 Replies latest jw friends
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nowisee
minimus....
please don't give up on people. they can and do change. it takes heart and great courage, but there are those who do, indeed, change.
i wish you well, minimus. you have taken a lot of **** on this board. i am glad you are still here.
haven't you changed????
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Lady Lee
Min you are so right.
Research shows that people's nature really doesn't change much. Mostly they just become more of whatever they already are - so the miserable become more miserable, the curious, more so, the couch potatoes - well you get the idea.
Therapy can change some things but mostly we just stay the same
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Brummie
Very good thoughts! Its good to appreciate people.
We dont change much from when we are born huh. This reminded me of something probably meaningless here but still. When my son was born the nurse smacked his foot to get him to cry, instead of crying like a new born does, he screamed in what seemed to be a blatant protest at the inconvenience, sort of a "aaarrrggghhh grrrr" instead of a new born whimper. To this day he screams and protest that exact same way (and we never smack him), he's almost 7 yrs old now and his protests are sudden loud outburst like "arrrrghhhhhhh grrrrr". Strange family arnt we. But I dont think his personality is any different from the day he was born.
Anyway, I'm off to bed.
Brummie
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Ravyn
Brummie cat, why shouldn't your son growl like a little wild cat?
Ravyn
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Lady Lee
Nowisee I don't know if that is the kind of change that Min meant but I'm sure he can let us know.
I do think most people can recover from just about anything if they work at it.
But the personal nature of a person doesn't seem to change. As min said complainers tend to complain regardless of their life situation. Go-getters keep moving. Leaders find new groups to lead. Followers continue to follow.
Now in the JWs I was a follower because as a woman I had no choice but my nature is to be a leader - (first-born and all that) and now that I am free of those JW shackles I have found the leader in mej
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Brummie
Brummie cat, why shouldn't your son growl like a little wild cat?
Ravyn
ROFLMFAO I meant to say "arrrgghhh purrrrrrrrrrr" Brummie
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nowisee
so, lady lee, let me understand....
are you saying that you have changed?
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Lady Lee
Oh Brummie that is so funny. My youngest daughter was a fighter before she was born. She had to fight to get born (high risk pregnancy) and she came out fighting and fought me all the way through her childhood and that girl is still fighting the world. No one steps on her.
The older one was shy and also a fighter but for others. She was the quiet one and still is. She has had to find her voice and a 31 she has found it. She can still be shy (like her mom) but she has found the strength within. It was there all along because she used it always to help others - but now she can use it for herself too
Their basic natures have never changed but their ability to express it has
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Lady Lee
nowisee
My basic nature has not changed. My ability to express has changed. I think those are different things