First of all welcome to the forum! You have an amazing story and it captured me. I know all to well the pressure that comes from well meaning but manipulative loved ones. Just when you are going to break free, they reel us back in because the empathy and pain from seeing our loved ones in distress become too much. I too am still in, pretending to keep my marriage together. I don't really pretend that much, only accompany her to the meetings and about once a month into service. It's the price I pay to keep the peace.
i too was baptized at 12 before I really had a clue. This is why they want child baptism, it keeps people like us stuck. You are fortunate in a few ways that some of us aren't
1- you have a good talent
2- you are still young
3- you didn't marry a JW and
4- don't have kids to worry about being indoctrinated.
as far as this talent goes, I don't know your circumstances but it would help if you could move out on your own, that way you don't have to put up with the pressure from your mom. It will enable you to live your life without the scrutiny.
I do know that you will have extreme regret if you look back when you are older and realize you wasted your talents and life doing something you don't even believe in, and lived someone else's life. One of the biggest deathbed regrets, is that a person lived the life OTHERSexpected them to, and we're not true to themselves.
I know it will be extremely painful to let your mom down, but she has to be mature and realize that you are now an adult and can make your own decisions. It is selfish and wrong to expect a grown man to conform to parents wishes. As bad as the distress will be letting your mom down, a million times worse will be the pain of realizing you blew your skills and threw away this precious life you have.. Don't make that mistake. Get out there and start your life my friend!
Again in welcome to the forum and pm me of you ever want to talk more.. -Joel