Being a JW kid is hell

by JRK 25 Replies latest jw experiences

  • JRK

    In therapy, I was told I should write a letter of grievances to each of my parents. I really do not have any for my mother, except for things that directly relate to being raised as a Jehovah's Witness. Upon reflection, my childhood was hell because of the religion and its pernicious corruption of a normal childhood.

    I am going to share the letter I wrote to my mother because it describes JW childhood in a nutshell. Please share in the comments some of your experiences growing up JW.


    I wish you never became a JW and wish I would have never been in a cult. It was because of that, and the idealistic viewpoint you had that got me beat up in school. I got picked on because I couldn’t say the Pledge of Allegiance in school, and not stand for the national anthem. I had to not go to sports “pep rallies” so I had to spend that time in detention.

    I got beat up a lot because you told me to “turn the other cheek” like Jesus said. Once kids knew I would not fight back, they picked on me and hit me a lot in school. Being a JW kid is pure hell. That and I was not encouraged to get a higher education. Education was of no value unless it was for the cult. That is why I never brought homework home, I always just tried to do it when I got to school in the morning, and my grades suffered. I could have really excelled in school if I just had any encouragement.

    I was very angry at you when finally remembered in therapy and told you about Elder DD molesting me when I was a child. I told you about it, and you were matter of fact about it and not angry. Then when he died, you were sad and tried to tell me how wonderful he was. That hurt me considering my history with him.

    I do appreciate all the wonderful things that you did do for me, and you were my closest person in the world. Through thick and thin I could count on you. You helped me so much when I had my crazy times and we never shunned each other. You were always there when I needed you. I am glad that is the one cult thing that you and I did not ever follow.

    I wish you were still here, but I am very happy that your suffering is over. I loved you very much! I promise that I will keep feeding your birds.



  • dubstepped

    Oh buddy, that's a tough topic. It is hell for many. I'm so sorry about your mom's reaction over the molestation and that guy's death. That's so messed up and indicative of the way they compartmentalize things and hide what they don't want to see.

    I have to ask, was your mom raised a JW?

    I ask because my parents weren't. They had no clue what bullshit they put us through as kids to support their cult club.

    I was bullied a lot in school. It wasn't all due to JW stuff, but that made it all so much worse and guaranteed that I'd always be different.

    Also, screw my parents for always putting JW stuff above us. We couldn't go camping because we'd have to do so on thr weekend and might have to miss some boring, repetitive meeting. I spent so many evenings after school going out in hot cars to knock on doors so my parents could play pioneer for month.

    I never mattered to them. Not truly. The damn cult meant everything. We were always a distant second place, at best, an afterthought maybe if we were lucky. We were a problem to be controlled, a potential detriment to their status and perfect little appearance in the cult.

  • 2+2=5

    My non JW father died when I was around the age to start school.

    Raised a JW by my mother, I believed we would see my dad again in ‘paradise’, and going to the boring meetings was our way of getting there.

    All my school friends would first be destroyed to make way for the beautiful paradise. Once my friends and unbelieving relatives were killed, only then could I have the joyful reunion with my dad.

    I knew as a 6 year old, this was messed up.

    The JW religion plays Russian roulette with a child’s mental health.

  • Atlantis


    Thank you!


  • VIII

    JRK, very sorry for what you went through. Many of us were bullied and beat up in school. The whole no Pledge and no Birthdays, no Halloween, no Xmas, no holidays kids did back then (60s & 70s). We had recess and gym class and no one wanted me on their team because I was that Loser Jehovah kid who was always put out in the hallway or in the coat room during party time when it was someone's birthday or a holiday.

    I was relentlessly picked on by a couple of boys from grade 5 through high school. They lived down the street..

    My Mom told me, a girl, to beat them up. Three boys. Umm, yeah, it doesn't work that way against three boys.

    My Mother let us down in so many ways so she could put the Cult first. I, too, was molested and she told me to shut up about it because it was a Worldly father of a JW friend and he won't join the Cult if I told anyone. To this day I despise her when she talks about Child Abuse victims and ignored my own pleas to not be put in that situation with my friend.

    I literally just got off the phone with her. She invited me to the Memorial. I wanted to tell her to F-off. I hate this Cult with every fiber of my being.

    Good luck with your therapy.

  • ShirleyW

    Ya' don't have to tell me being a born in, I thought my mom was the wackiest JW mom, but at least I didn't have to sit outside the Principal's office or go to the library during holiday parties like I've heard so many say they had to do.

    I didn't play my cards right on this one, but a few of young sisters my age back in the day were going to see Anita Baker, so my mom turns it around like I turned down the invite when, of course, I never received one or had any idea they were going until she opened her big mouth, she says "I don't know why you're not going" don't remember if she thru in the " if you were doing what you should be doing in the truth" line but, for a concert obviously you tickets, you just don't show up at the front of the venue.

    What I should've said was "yeah, I want to go" then she would've royally embarrassed me by begging them to add me along and get me a ticket like the stepchild nobody wants to be bothered with Wouldn't have gone anyway, but obviously it bothered her as well as to why I was never included in activities including my peers. Also I found out they went skating every week when I was in my early 20's, never was invited to that either. FUCK THEM ALL with their conditional love.

  • JRK


    My mother got baptized right after I was born. She had no clue what it was like growing up in the religion. You are right about the priorities being messed up, that the organization came first.


  • JRK


    When I was growing up, mom had us pray that my unbelieving father would die before Armageddon, so he would get resurrected. You are right that it is crazy making!


  • JRK


    I forgot all about the birthdays and holidays in my letter! How could I have done that? I guess it shows how long it has been since I was young. It sounds like your mom was not a damned pacifist like mine! I am sorry you were molested too. The person that did it to me was the Congregation Servant, and he did it when I was going to go through the 80 questions with him. Thank you fucking Jehovah. Oh yeah, I ain't going to the memorial either.


  • JRK


    Oh yeah, I hear you! As a "divided family," we miss being in a lot of cliques in the congregation. I know I missed out on some events, most of which I didn't care about. One time I got invited to an Elder's house for a Watchtower Study and Taffy Pull. He asks me to step into his den and asked me one-on-one if I was doing anything that the Elders should know about. I said, "I don't know, do you know something I don't know?" So I certainly do not miss the social aspect of the cult.


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