Let's talk business ...
So, what does it look like when one hits that wall of exhaustion and ends up in the hospital? I've been burning way too brightly myself and have closed in on burnout. Well, I've felt burned out, but I don't know what that limit is where it becomes too much. I know that I've felt ill from working so much, and I know that on many weekends I just crash and burn instead of having any energy to go have fun or anything.
Look at you, all going back to school and pursuing what you want as well. I think I can identify with some of what you're feeling. For a certainty I'd have a hard time picking just one thing to major in. I want to learn about so many things, but also have to face harsh realities regarding time, energy, money, and focus.
I've been thinking about what you said about the future looking blank for you. While I don't feel that way myself, I think I can grasp that. For me the future looks like a projection of the present, but that's scary in it's own way because I don't want to live the same days over and over again. For you it sounds like you are somewhat directionless, not really sure what the future holds, and in contrast with a future doom and then a panda paradise that we all had painted for us during our entire lives as JWs, it must be a very strange view of the future.
I suppose looking further down the line, maybe a PhD and career in research.
It seems that both would pay me to be a student.
I like the idea of being paid to be a student.
I think that's great LUHE. Being paid to learn and research seems like a fascinating life. A professional student of sorts. We clean for some people that work in research at the local university and they seem very happy with it. Well, they're professors, but they do research, I may not know exactly what they do but it seems like a good life for them.
I came from poverty and I'm still poor. The one job I really wanted was to be a mother and I can't do that. For the record, they don't adopt kids out to poor people, and for good reason. But even if they did, for health reasons, the better choice is to not have children. There are a lot of jobs I can't do for health reasons. I'm a good teacher. Teaching does not pay the bills. None of the things that I find joy in, pay the bills. And I'm not good at doing things that I can't find any joy in.
I haven't found success in business yet. But I did do one thing that I will count towards any success that I do eventually achieve. I went back to college. I had started in my early twenties and dropped out to deal with (diagnosed) extreme PTSD. I would tell anyone who is older and wants to go to college to go for it. I know this is true in the US. Ever since the recession hit in 2008 a LOT of older people have gone to college to change careers or to go into a career. I went back at the age of 35 or so and there were a lot of other non-traditional (older) students.
I'm actually planning on going back for my graduate degree in the next 2 years. I have some health problems at the moment that I want under better control before I get into school (which takes a lot of energy and self-motivation at the graduate level). I'll most likely be going for Teaching English to Speakers of Other Languages (TESOL) so that I can teach adults in college or high school most likely. It isn't a real productive career choice under the current administration. Trump has made the USA a very unfriendly place for foreigners, so that's lovely. And I won't be living in other countries to teach due to my health problems. But I might get to travel and see something of the world. That would be nice. I could make a real difference to some people in the world, and that is a decent second best to having children.
I'm currently disenfranchised with my career choices and options. I'm usually a very positive person. If I could go back and do it over knowing what I know now.... I would do everything differently. Everything. But I made the best choices I could at each point I had to make choices. Wait till I have a permanent job and benefits. Then my tune will be much more positive.
@jwundubbed, I grew up poor too. I'm sorry you feel so hopeless aside from the pursuit of education and possibilities that it holds, but I'm glad that you do have that thing to look forward to in the future.
If you ever wanted ideas, perhaps people here could come up with ideas of things that you might be able to do with your limitations that could help, but I also realize that may be a long shot. Still, someone might know of something. I know that there are companies out there that have work at home opportunities that are legitimate, like providing customer service over the phone, though I don't know how hard it is to get in with those companies or what you've tried already.
I like that you aren't beating yourself up for choices that were made and that you realize that you did the best you could at each point where you had to. That's true of most of it, and beating ourselves up wouldn't do any good anyway.
Oh, and what's your current line of work that you're getting a Master's to help advance?
My current work is in the medical industry (those who know me will be opening their eyes!). No, I'm not clinical staff, I'm in the Administration Areas of one of the top 3 Schools of Medicine in USA. We're opening a brand new hospital in NYC, with all the bells and whistles and the latest technologies, including robots to carry medication and sheets for patients.
My current Masters is in Media for Education. Finally decided to legitimize education and training as part of my career(s), as ever since I had my first job I've always had to teach something or train somebody on something.
Honestly, to this day I have never been able to take one path in my career; it's always been Education, Technology and some kind of social/community work. All three have always gone hand-by-hand, every job I've had has always had element of the three.
I would love to work for myself. Trouble is, i dont have any idea what I'd actually do. Also, the thought of cutting free from 9-5 employment and going out on my own feels very risky to me.
Although, if i did work for myself it'd solve a lot of issues im having at the moment juggling school dropoffs/collections and work.
@scratchme - Sound like you are absolutely killing it. Well done! Sounds like you've had a unique path, especially as an exjw in the workplace.
@pale.emperor - I definitely don't think that owning a business or being self-employed is for everyone, but here's something to think of regarding risk. You are essentially in business for yourself already. Don't believe me, try not showing up and see how well it goes, lol. You are in your own little business now with one client. All if your eggs are in one basket. Lose that and it's all gone.
My wife and I have 30 clients. If we lose one it isn't crushing. We just replace them, and we keep more clients than absolutely necessary. So from a risk perspective we are in a better place in some ways.
Now when you're starting out it can be scary. If you're already employed you could start something on the side if you had the circumstances to do so (harder with kids). Once the side gig was going strong and it felt like the boat was closer to the dock, so to speak, you could make the jump without the worry of falling in and getting wet.
Again though, it isn't for everyone. Figuring out what to do is just a small part of it. Making it work is tough. Lots of hard lessons learned, though theree are lots of courses online to help you start most businesses.
My situation is slightly different. I was in my early twenties back in the early 90s. At that time the organization was ok with some higher education (Not 4 year universities, but community college courses and trade schools). I went to college for 2 years with the intent (and cover story) to get certified as a LAN engineer. Instead I earned 2 degrees - Criminal Justice and Spanish.
I have about 8 years left before I retire from 25+ year career in law enforcement. I have been playing with the idea for a while to open a Private Investigations business. I like the idea of being my own boss. Plus the money to be made can be immense in my area.