My First CLAM Meeting

by The Searcher 20 Replies latest social humour

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  The Searcher

  I carried out my monthly "cover" visit to the K.H. tonight.

  As previously discussed on this forum, the CLAM meeting is just a rehashed, recycled, reshuffled, & rebranded Ministry School and Service Meeting.

  The apathy in the congregation (barely 50% in attendance) was palpable! I discreetly looked at different ones during the proceedings, and their stony facial expressions spoke volumes. This religion is not the one they signed up for, and several looked as if they'd lost the will to live. The young married couple in front of me kept themselves occupied by whispering sweet nothings to each other throughout the meeting. The same 7 or 8 people kept answering the questions from the platform. This meeting compounds the Corporation's major blunder of cancelling the home Book Study Group.

  I know - this post is in the Jokes & Humour section, but this meeting is one bad joke!!!

  I'll sleep well tonight.
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  slimboyfat

  I think it was a blinder too it was the best meeting.
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  ShirleyW

  and CLAM stands for ? ? ?
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  sparrowdown

  Christian Life and Ministry = CLAM-barf.
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  wifibandit

  The young married couple in front of me kept themselves occupied by whispering sweet nothings to each other throughout the meeting.

  Ha! That is me. The whispers are a mix of sweet nothings and pointing out contradictions. Like these two, one week apart!

  
  
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  snare&racket

  Sounds clamtastic..... Wish I'd never left now! a

  hhhhhh wait, no, no I am still glad I left. My mistake!
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  Sour Grapes

  It sounds like the Witchtower Babel and Trick Society just wanted to eliminate the word "school" from the meeting for some legal issues and at the same time make everyone feel excited about scrambling the parts around for a new, refreshing, up building, can't be missed, so exciting, spiritually refreshing meeting.
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  prologos

  By the time the last part came down, -- the "imitation faith book" study, every body is spent, already asleep. This question and answer session, was at least 50 % silence, molasses dragging on to the closing song.
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  steve2

  The OP provides further evidence that a CLAM meeting can produce only one effect:

  Clamming up.
• 

  Bigdummy

  I haven't posted in a good while. I have been associated with this sect for approx.

  60 years, baptized for 50. For someone who is newly converted, this CLAM deal

  would be ok I suppose but the whole concept of jw indoctrination is very dis-

  heartening. I still go with my wife for a night meeting but I don't get as upset as

  I did just a few months ago. I can sit there for a couple of hours and it's like my

  mind is really kind of listening and yet I'm studying peoples reactions to what

  is said from the platform. It's like the Searcher said, the same few people do

  90% of the commenting and that's fine with me because I'm surely not going to.

  I haven't been door to door in many many months but yet I was asked if I wanted

  to get back on the ministry school. I thought that was very odd. I wonder some

  times if there are others at my hall who feel like I do. Too risky to try and find out

  but it is telling that a lot, and I mean a lot are silent. An elder was giving a part

  a few weeks ago that required audience participation and at one point he asked

  a question and there was dead silence for about 30 seconds and you could see

  he was getting frustrated and he said " come on people there's tons of answers

  here". My attitude is not the best anymore about any organized religion. I read

  the Bible and read a lot from Matthew Henry so I consider myself God fearing

  and live my life accordingly. I'm not a rebel nor a great thinker, but sometimes

  I wonder if the people in jw Ville do ANY thinking of their own. I know this is

  doubled space but I can't prevent it.