What a fader can say to a sleepy witness?

Darkknight757

I have a question. Yesterday while the wife and I were hitting garage sales we seen a house selling tools. This house happened to be a witness couple getting rid of some old stuff. It's a beautiful day mind you. The wife and I just hit the local farmers market and then we were going to get a Biggbe coffee and do some more errands.

We go to the house and talk to the couple who are long time friends. All these people can talk about it how hard life is and that they are "just barely hanging on...." My response to that is "Don't let go."

I find it amazing that this family really has it made. He has a great job, a beautiful home in a fantastic neighborhood. Yet they are visibly miserable.

What do you say to try to cheer up these sleepy culties? Since the wife and I have been out we have really been enjoying life again. Visiting family. Spending weekends doing whatever we want. This couple has it made and they are miserable. I could give them a million dollars and they would still be depressed.

konceptual99

I was with a small group of people the other day and one of the group said that they were surprised they were a Witness - they didn't like the ministry, didn't like going to all the meetings, didn't like the amount of stuff that needed doing and how they could easily be a Catholic and just pop to Church on a Sunday.

I just said well don't do it then.

zeb

Sadly jw are told to be miserable in this system because it is so corrupt etc. I have had cause recently to recall a score of conversations I have had with je friends down the years and they all ran on the same wt script.

I am ever amazed at folks like yourselves who wish to extend the hand to jw to lift them up orto show love in many ways but are stymied at every turn. Friends you cant convince them anymore than you could convince people in the field when you were a jw.

don't let their misery infect what you have.

nonjwspouse

Simply sharing your experiences of happy times, favorite things to do, special time together with family and special trips to see things. Glow with happiness. It is only a seed that you can plant. Any words against the beloved org will immediately be perceived as an attack against them, then deaf ears will follow.

zeb

nonjwspouse... love ya.

Darkknight757

Zeb I agree with the fact that they all seem to run on the same script. And yesterday I tried my damndest to cheer these two up but nothing seems to work.

His dad is a long time elder who is in constant pain from a long life of hard work. This elder now can hardly do anything without being in severe pain. I told the son that his dad has lived a long life and he has a great family. He should be proud of that and reflect on the good he has done. (Although he wasted a lot of it in the org)

These people's misery doesn't affect me personally but I do feel sorry for them. (Oxymoron)

ToesUp

Being a JW is like a hamster running on a Hamster wheel. They just keep running, never getting anywhere. No paradise, that they have been promised (over and over again). Just the same ole same ole. I believe that there are some 60-70 year old JW's that are coming to the realization (for the very first time) that they are going to die. It's tough for them to come to terms with. We actually had a family member tell us that they don't believe the end will come in their lifetime. WT has taken peoples hope away.

I agree with nonjwspouse. Smile and let em know how happy you are living life. Like Doc says...."living a happy and successful life is the best revenge."

Darkknight757

And that's what I try to do ToesUp, just be happy and positive. Even when we were going to the meetings and doing all the JWBS I was always a happy person. It seems more and more even the die hard witnesses are depressed as all hell. You're right though. The hope that they held right in front of them seems farther and farther away now. The last meeting I went to a few months back there was an old lady there that has cancer. All she said was that she hoped the kingdom would come before she dies. The look in her eyes were unforgettable. The tear-filled look of dispair. I gave her a hug and that was it. These people know they will die without their hope being fulfilled.

Maybe this topic should be: What to say to a sleepy witness to subtly wake them up and start enjoying the life they have left?

ToesUp

I know how I felt when I learned TTATT. My hope was taken away. The good thing about my realization is, I was still in my 40's and I had my spouse by my side. These older ones are 20-30+ years older than me. There life is pretty much set in stone. At least my spouse and I were still fairly young and our kids were young enough as well. I feel bad for many of the older ones. They thought they had it all figured out. I guess we did too. The difference....we were young enough to start over and live our lives. Sad.

Darkknight757

Even though they are old their life isn't over. A friend growing ups father was super old. He always said, "I'm not a dirty old man. I'm a sexy senior citizen!!" And he was indeed. Always screwing around with other ladies. Even some in their 20's. He didn't care. He was never home, always going out and having fun with people. Such an awesome guy and he went out with a bang....literally. These older witnesses are in a bad situation and I think they are about counted out, but the curtain hasn't drawn yet and so there is time to go around and bang some stuff and drink a bunch, see the beautiful world around them and make a difference.

This young couple that we seen yesterday has a good 40 or so years left. I just want to shake them.

What a fader can say to a sleepy witness?

Share this