Since leaving Watchtower it still strikes me as odd how little i knew the real world and how it works. I thought i knew how it worked but it turns out i didnt. As JWs we were always "courting with a view to marriage".You go on one date with a girl and everyone's expecting you're gonna marry her? You know the drill. You meet at a JW get-together or convention. You get the number. You arrange to meet up at a party or something (lots of chaperones of course). You maybe kiss. You date for a few years then get engaged. Looking back is the most ridiculous thing i've ever heard.
Surprisingly (especially for me) it's taken me over a year to fuly understand the dating scene in the real world. My situation: Im a soon-to-be-divorced dad of 32yo. My ex is still JW. Since my ex and i split up i've had 2 girlfriends, both of which escalated quicker than i'd liked simply because i didst understand the dating scene in the real world. I thought once you "get" with a girl you're obliged to stick with her.
Allow me to explain.... i go to an art class every other Sunday. A few weeks ago i meet a girl in this class and we hit it off. We swap numbers and end up going for a drink of tea in some fancy-shmancy tea shop (this is England guys, we love our tea). After a delightful hour of talking and drinking tea we depart and make arrangements. Fast forward, a week later we're having sex. A week after that things have cooled down and i hardly hear from her. I dont wanna look like one of "those guys" that are insecure but it's bugging me as to what this is so i ask her. She replied "oh, i just wanted to have sex with you. Why? What did you thing this was?"
Now, thats fine. Really, it is. But i really had this strange idea in my head that im supposed to "court" this girl afterwards. Or at least be her "boyfriend" for a while. As liberating as it was it really hit home to me how little i really knew of the real world and how it works. Dont get me wrong, im 100% for women being sexually liberated, but i've never had that happen before. When i told my female friends they just said "yeah, she's just done what most guys do to girls they like".
Did any of you have any difficulty transitioning into the real world relationship-wise?