A Positive Approach to discussing the changes - Gov Body Update Aftermath

by Jehalapeno 10 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

  • Jehalapeno

    So, just got off a very emotional, but positive call with my father.

    This past weekend, he wanted to give me a call, but I was out of town at a wedding, so he said he'd call me later in the week.

    He texted me the Governing Body Update video with the recent changes and said, "I thought you might be interested in some of the changes that were just announced."

    I'm tired of self-censorship, so I decided to reply as truthfully and respectfully as I could.

    My reply to him:

    It's interesting. Seems Morris was holding them back from beginning to make some positive strides towards reform. I hope it continues. Genuinely.

    Today, he called me. Asked me what I thought about the changes.

    I reiterated that it's a step in the right direction and that I hope more is coming along these lines.

    He mentioned my comment about Morris and said he's not sure about that. And I said, "Well, no, of course I don't have proof of it. It's very coincidental, though, that Tony Morris leaves the governing body and within a year all these changes start being made. That's not evidence he was holding them back, but I think it certainly raises the question of that being a possibility."


    He let me criticize the organization...I brought up how disfellowshipped people are treated and that I hope they continue to refine that policy because it's very cruel...

    It ended up being a nice and respectful conversation about him having hope that I return, but respecting that it's my decision and me telling him I don't want him to have false hope, but I do hope we can have regular talks again.

    I closed with: "I have hope that the religion you and mom follow, whether I follow it or not, will continue to make these positive changes and it becomes even more enjoyable for you both."


    Look, I know that many of these changes are superficial in comparison to lots of the issues the organization is having. But we should be allowed to be happy that at least SOME things are moving in a more positive direction.

    I sincerely do hope that the religion we all have loved ones in becomes less and less intrusive on their lives. I would love for it to happen overnight, but I can live with having it happen little by little over time.

    And, want to shout out the activists in Norway. There's no evidence these changes are directly related to their efforts in that country or not, however it's another interesting coincidence. Thank you to those activists for CARING enough to see it through.

  • TonusOH

    That sounds good, congrats Jehalapeno. I hope it leads to more open communication with your parents.

    I do feel a bit of sadness, because it shows how tightly so many are controlled. How many JWs are now jumping at the chance to take back a bit more control of their lives? How many will forget the old justifications and thank the GB for the gift of new light? I wonder how I would have reacted if I was still PIMI? I bet I would have felt gratitude.

  • Gorb

    I have these kind of conversations with my father. Nice to see your respect!


  • Vidiot

    You were the bigger man and arguably showed more compassion than he did.


  • jehovaxx

    The direction is all DF’ed ones should be contacted by family or friends.

    Some may get contacted by several or even many family and friends.

    I wonder if JW families are all talking about who is going to contact the DF’ed family members?

  • truthlover123

    Your a good son. Respectful as well, maybe, not hearing from him for some time. Sounds like he is thinking and your answers will give him pause to think of everything occurring, although, probably, like most older ones, won't know what to do or where to go as the scripture " to whom will we go" will be forefront in his mind. I wouldn't doubt the org will be mentioning that from time to time to bring the flock back.

  • Diogenesister

    Hear hear!!

    Happy for you my Savoury dude!! It's heartening to hear about these opening salvos between once estranged family members.

    I don't know if the Norwegian activists were the direct cause of these changes ...but there's a bloody good chance the GB viewed the way the case was headed - and the eventual outcome - as confirmation from Jehovah that they need to listen to "those in authority placed there by God" !!

  • Jehalapeno

    Update: I decided to test whether or not this was just a memorial thing or because they were told to reach out. Invited him to lunch.

    He agreed to have lunch with me next month when I am in town. So, he’s “having a meal” with someone like me.

    Perhaps it’s because I’m not officially disfellowshipped or disassociated?

    I was a “known apostate” for a while. (Some of you may know me as Cappytan.)

    However, I’ve never been dealt with judicially either in absentia or otherwise.

    Perhaps the loosening of how disfellowshipped ones being treated at the Kingdom Hall made it so his conscience allows him to open up the relationship again since I’m only “inactive” on paper?

  • DesirousOfChange
    Perhaps the loosening of how disfellowshipped ones being treated at the Kingdom Hall made it so his conscience allows him to open up the relationship again since I’m only “inactive” on paper?

    While you can still get soft shunned by most PIMI JWs for just being "inactive" (fading?), it is a great loophole for those who choose to go that route.

  • Vidiot
    “You were the bigger man and arguably showed more compassion than he did… Respect.”

    Not to mention that he demonstrated humility in his admission that you were right, didn’t resent it, and trusted you not to rub his nose in it.

    Respect to him, too.

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