Hello to everyone.
I hope you are all well and sorting things out between yourselves. I have temporary internet access which is probably a good thing for now. I have been contacted by the ARC in a respectful and loving manner today.
You see. I realised that throughout my hearing, I ranted away, on and on and on.........afraid that I would be called a liar or have to give physical proof of the wrongs I had experienced in my childhood attachment to the society. The way I would describe these lovely people is..."loving and infinitely patient". I went away within days of giving testimony as I needed as much distance as I could afford. Upon my return, I mucked them around and around. I didn't turn up for appointments and found fantastic reasons for not doing so. Did they get angry? No.
They sent letters of support and encouragement, telling me that the next step was a formidable one and they would back me up on every level. Today I felt at my wits end and phoned them.
I asked them if this was all a waste of time. An exercise in the "gathering of information for the sake of information"
I told them I was afraid that it was all unreality and that if this was the case, then let us get to the bottom of it and cease the witch-hunt. Especially as I, for one, was in constant remorse for anything I may have said incorrectly. This was not considered a problem with the ARC as they have access to my medical records and court records. (Not that I was stealing or what ever. Rather, it was my father taking me to court to make me a ward of the state) Having clarified all of this and hence being reassured that I was a decent person throughout I was asked if I wanted to continue with legal aspect of it all. I hummed and haahed around, not wanting to commit. This is,very common with abuse survivors. They lack conviction whilst being convicted for crimes they did not perpetuate.
They (the ARC) don't want to push a person over the edge, but they do want a good witness to testify to the lack of concern, requisite legal obligation and such........of any child entrusted to them by a parent or group...
They want evidence of trustworthiness and pure motive for the existence of any social or religious group as a caveat for their existence, Sufficient to say, there has been minimal evidence of such motives and plenty of damning evidence to the contrary. ( A small dose of compassion and sorriness for what went wrong, may have been tremendously helpful to the investigative parties of ARC) But this was not to be. An honest, empathetic approach to this ugliness could have been so helpful in sorting out what needed to be done, within these so called 'groups' that are supposed to support the welfare and development of the minds and
bodies of young ones
I have agreed to go to court against the society and will be assisted with all aspects of my abuse and the chronology. It seems that even if a perpetrator is dead; the society he or she belonged to, is held accountable by virtue of their action or lack of action. I like Australian law
All the best to you all and I hope you maintain a certain faith in the Australian system
