Have you thought of contacting the local newspaper (Chronicle-Herald/Halifax Daily News)? You could probably talk to someone who writes human interest stories - people really do need to be made aware of autism and how it impacts on families and the affected children - and if your story gets covered, you will be surprised at how many professionals come out of the woodwork to help. There's nothing like a newspaper story that puts them in bad light in the public eye (it's your tax money that's paying their salaries, right??) to make them give their head a shake and do their job where your family is concerned.
I don't know what the equivalent agency in Nova Scotia is to Ontario's Children's Aid Society, but they will probably be able to offer you some direction as well. The social workers should have knowledge of all the available resources and don't be afraid to ask them "What do I need to do to get this for my son?", "Who is the best person to speak to about [whatever]?", "How long does it take?", etc. If you are interested in temporary or permanent placement for your son, they should be able to help you with that. You MUST stress to them that you are NOT COPING WELL. If you are on the edge of a nervous breakdown, you need to make that clear to them.
It sounds to me like you're going through caregiver burnout (in addition to your other health problems) - and I wouldn't be surprised if your man is also. You both need a break.
There are programs out there for kids with disabilities - Tim Hortons even has summer camps for disabled children - check those out and see if you can get your son in on one of those. It will give you and your guy a break, and your son will be with other kids, being looked after by people who want to be there helping him have fun.
Thanks for sharing with us, Shera. I hope we've been a little helpful. I know we can't do a lot, but we do care - you're a valuable member of our community.