I'm stressed

by shera 28 Replies latest jw friends

  • termite 35
    termite 35

    Shera; just checking back in,

    what a great link Spice put up for you; hope you get some support and encouragement from there

    the hospital sounds like a wonderful idea- I hope they can give you some respite care soon. I think you are amazing to keep going with all your problems...just don't forget to make some time for 'you' too.If you want my number just email me.I'm thinking of you and wish I could help you in a practical way .

    termie xx

  • blacksheep
    blacksheep

    ((((shera))))

    I was so touched by your post. Who WOULDN'T be stressed under the circumstances? Please do not feel guilty about doing what you have to do, given your situation. I don't have any references to offer like some of these other great folks. I'm just another mom who can only imagine what strength you have. You sound like a wonderful mommy who loves her child very much, is having to simply make some difficult but sound choices for her family's well being. I wish you all the best! I am sure there should be a way for you and your son to get the help you need. Please keep us posted. And post anytime...

  • shera
    shera

    As always Thankyou.

    Witch,I am a shy person and when I was a JW,going out in service was stressful for me.That must be extreme for your son.Poor guy!

  • Scully
    Scully

    shera:

    Have you thought of contacting the local newspaper (Chronicle-Herald/Halifax Daily News)? You could probably talk to someone who writes human interest stories - people really do need to be made aware of autism and how it impacts on families and the affected children - and if your story gets covered, you will be surprised at how many professionals come out of the woodwork to help. There's nothing like a newspaper story that puts them in bad light in the public eye (it's your tax money that's paying their salaries, right??) to make them give their head a shake and do their job where your family is concerned.

    I don't know what the equivalent agency in Nova Scotia is to Ontario's Children's Aid Society, but they will probably be able to offer you some direction as well. The social workers should have knowledge of all the available resources and don't be afraid to ask them "What do I need to do to get this for my son?", "Who is the best person to speak to about [whatever]?", "How long does it take?", etc. If you are interested in temporary or permanent placement for your son, they should be able to help you with that. You MUST stress to them that you are NOT COPING WELL. If you are on the edge of a nervous breakdown, you need to make that clear to them.

    It sounds to me like you're going through caregiver burnout (in addition to your other health problems) - and I wouldn't be surprised if your man is also. You both need a break.

    There are programs out there for kids with disabilities - Tim Hortons even has summer camps for disabled children - check those out and see if you can get your son in on one of those. It will give you and your guy a break, and your son will be with other kids, being looked after by people who want to be there helping him have fun.

    Thanks for sharing with us, Shera. I hope we've been a little helpful. I know we can't do a lot, but we do care - you're a valuable member of our community.

    Love, Scully

  • Thunder Rider
    Thunder Rider

    Shera,

    I feel for you. I know what it is like to try to care for some one that needs more than you can offer. My parents cranked out little dubs like they were soley responsible for populating the "new order", two of those kids had serious maladies. Cerebral palsy and Downs Syndrome. Once off the tit it was up to me and my sister to raise and care for them. Sometimes love just ain't enough. You won't do yourself or your son any good if you end up a basket case. Realize your limitations and be OK with it. Expolre opportunities of support and assistence in local groups and organizations. Kick your "man" in the ass and let him know that his behavior is unacceptable. (more than willing to help out there) Respectfuly demand his help and attention.

    SheilaM just finished doing a paper on Autism for school. She says that there are new and promising treatments on the horizon.

    Chin up kid. If I prayed you would be in them. If you need to talk, feel free to message us.

    Thunder

  • shera
    shera

    I have to keep thanking every one who posts.

    Thankyou Scully and Thunder.

    I am feeling much better now,your words have helped me a great deal.I'm waiting for phone calls....if they don't call soon.i'll start harassing them.

    With the visit I had yesterday,he told me I'm in the drivers seat.Well,I'm gonna buckle up because here I come.

  • jgnat
    jgnat

    It sounds like you need a break. We have something in Edmonton called Kids Kottage that helps parents get a break when they are overwhelmed. I don't know if there is something similar where you live. Have you tried L'Arche? http://www.larchecanada.org/frset1a.html

  • shera
    shera

    I sent them an e-mail Jgnat.I'll see if they have anything to offer.thanks for the link

  • wednesday
    wednesday

    shera,

    At least with a marriage u can divorce and get out. U can never really divorce your child.i think scully had good ideas. your support system has to increase. And u may have to place him. that does not mean u would be out of his life.

    My heart goes out to u, but if u are burned out, how can u help your child?

    My PM system is open to u. if u still believe in prayer, do that. Try and find support.

    weds

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