I got a great gift today from someone at H2O. It was a post
in response to my "Emotional Bankruptcy" thread that I
posted here, and there as well.
It's a gift because it was just the kick in the ass that I needed.
The perfect reminder of why I am not only happy, but relieved
that I got out of the Borg: with or without my family. I am posting
it here so that it might serve as a reminder to you all too:
This was posted by "Elder25"
Did you not know what it meant to leave Jehovah's Organization before you chose the course
you did? Did you not know the consequences? Out of love for your interests didn't His people
warn you and lovingly try to protect you from such tragedy? Your current state of "Emotional
Bankruptcy" is an unfortunate result of your disregarding the "wisdom from above". You
ignored the loving intentions from Jehovah's Organization. If you had listened to that
wisdom, you would have avoided all the trouble you face, and all the heartaches that
continue to come along with it.
Jehovah is a forgiving God, and wants you back. But until you accept full responsibility for
your mistakes and make things straight with Jehovah, the agonizing effect of broken hearts
will still show it's ugly face in your life. You have the key to turn that around, not your family
or anyone else.
Many have turned around and have been reinstated. Many of them have said that if it
weren't for their relatives remaining steadfast in their applying wisdom from above
regarding the treatment of disfellowshipped ones, they might not have had the complete
motivation to return to Jehovah. It is love for you that motivates your family members to
courageously take that stand.
I replied to him, but what I said doesn't matter. What matters
is that I realized that I have so much more to be happy about
than to regret losing.
He also made me realize that I've been spending entirely too
much time worrying about the past, and things that I cannot
I spent today laying in bed and on the couch, unable to get up
without Jack's help, and unable to focus my eyes most of the
day. Right now the font here is so huge I think the people next
door can read it.
So it's time for me to take a step back and regain my perspective.
Taking some time from here will allow me to rest, then
hopefully answer all the mail that I have backlogged: and
then maybe, just maybe start writing something that I can
attempt to get published. (I can't thank you enough,
Franciose *kiss on the cheek* Your encouragement was
perfectly timed) Thanks to everyone else who has been
encouraging me to write as well. It's been my dream since
childhood, I think that it's time I started trying to invest
some genuine effort into it.
I have a big obstacle to overcome, right now I'm trying
to keep from crashing head first into a full blown MS
episode so for now, its off to bed with me. When I
get my strength back...I have to start laying plans for
the future...because its time.
It's spring, and I want to spend some time smelling the roses,
too. To remind myself of the good things, what is possible.
I won't vanish completely on you all, I will check back in when I
can. And you all have my e mail.
I'm just so tired and weak right now, I have to
get the wind back in my sails. I'm making no sense,
can't see much. Even the font this big is becoming a big blur. That means
it's time for bed, and a rest. Be well while I'm away and know you're
all with me in my heart!
"They are defeated...I will never be." ~Ro Laren