I received your PM and sent you another before I saw your thread here.
I am now trying to backtrack and play the depression card
to buy me some time and limit the damage I've done in previous meetings
The depression card has worked very well for me. Being a JW is very depressing, let it all out to them. If the "brothers" want to talk to you, just keep telling them how sad you are about your JW life. How your entire identity and reason for believing has been stripped away by them removing you as an elder. After your years of slaving, they kicked you to the curb when you realized you were engaged to the wrong woman. They'll try to "give encouragement" and you can pretend to be a little encouraged. But then return to that same "depression", repeat, and repeat. So often it seems like most elders will avoid those who seem chronically depressed.
I think it was actually therapeutic for me to attend the meetings and really show how really depressing the whole thing was... after decades of pasting on a smile at the meeting when I was tired, annoyed, and depressed. Even though I'm not depressed now, I still have that card ready to play. If anyone asks, "Don't you want to return?", I can simply respond, "Do you want me to kill myself like Xxxx did?"
And any doubts that you've expressed, I'd suggest rewrapping them in the "a return visit told me about the JW pedophile scandal, WT false prophecies, etc." type of thing.