Why do some JWs love seeing others get disfellowshipped?

by Tameria2001 24 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

  • Tameria2001

    I'm not sure how many in the organization is like this, but there some JWs who love seeing others get disfellowshipped, and my father-in-law is one of those. He became a JW because he loved the idea of being the head of the household, and lording it over his family. As a JW he is very hypocritical, my husband would tell stories of how they would celebrate Christmas until his mother-in-law called him on it. She was not a JW, but a witch, and I don't mean that in a bad term, but an actual witch. He nearly lost his children due to abuse, he would take cigarettes and put them out on my husband's back (when he was a baby). Now mind you he did not smoke, he just bought them to do this horrible deed. That all stopped when the same woman put a gun in his mouth and told him if he laid another finger on her grandson, she would pull the trigger, and you did not mess with this woman. To this day my husband still has the scars to prove it, but I learned this through his aunts. Eventually, my husband's grandmother paid for her grandson to learn martial arts so he could defend himself from his father.

    When my husband was around 4 his dad became a JW, and eventually, he became an elder. When this man was a ministerial servant, my husband was around 16 when this happened. His father allowed a fellow witness, a brother, who was having some finical difficulties move in with him and his family. While he was not around, this "brother" would make advances to my mother-in-law. She informed her husband that he needed to get that "brother" out of the house, but he flat out refused. Eventually, the man worked his charms on her, and they kissed, and he did touch her chest. At that moment something clicked, and she made him stop. She told her husband about it, and that she was deeply sorry for what had happened. One other thing, she only had this moment of weakness because her mother was recently murdered by her father. He shot her multiple times, right in front of her sister, and a couple of months after that her younger brother died from brain cancer.

    My husband said his dad called up the elders and informed them what had happened, and he actually pushed for his wife to be disfellowshipped. Then after that, my husband told me that they moved into a congregation (in the same town) that was very snooty. It was pure hell on his mother and his siblings. His mother was reinstated one year later, personally, if it were me I would have told him to F off.

    Now fast forward 12 years later, my husband has a moment of weakness that would normally be a disfellowshipping matter. Like his mother, he came clean about it with me. I was not sure how to deal with the situation and thought that the elders would help us through this issue. You all know that's what they tell everyone, and I was gullible enough at the time to believe that crap. So before going to the elders my husband and I talked about it, and we went to see them together. Before all this, I had talked to my mother, but that was a huge mistake because that was when I learned how big of gossip she is, and because of this my father-in-law found out. Now mind you, neither of these people live in the same circuit as us.

    The judicial committee talked to me about this, and since no one else in the congregation knew of the matter, and that my husband came clean right way, and I was willing to forgive him, they decided on a private reproof. As a result, two things also happened, my mother's local body of elders (in a different state) told her that if she did not stop she would find herself getting disfellowshipped. And my husband father, who was an elder by now, was pushing hard to have his son disfellowshipped. Our local body of elders told him that it was none of his concern and that he did not stop, he too would find himself in the hot seat as well. They were involved in my husband's mother's case.

    Why do some JWs love seeing others get disfellowshipped?

  • Bad_Wolf

    One of two things

    A. Either they are self righteous

    B. They are jealous when they abstain from sex and somebody else does it and doesn't get dfed.

  • Pete Zahut
    Pete Zahut

    Other than when someone who had repeatedly wronged others and had finally gotten their comeuppance, I never saw anyone actually be glad when others got disfellowshipped.

    What I did see were certain ones who had very little authority or power in their own lives and consequently reveled in the extra virtuousness and the small bit of (Watchtower sanctioned) power they were able to experience when they shunned someone once they had already been disfellowshipped. I remember those who would go out of their way to be seen by a disfellowshipped person just so they could walk by and ignore them or those who 'd make a big show of scurrying away horrified, snatching their children up out of harms way when a disfellowship person came into their presence.

  • neat blue dog
    neat blue dog

    What crazy Mexican soap opera did this story come from?? 😉

  • recluse

    textbook definition of a dysfunctional family. i honestly dont see why people expose themselves to this shit.

  • waton

    Family story aside, In this arrangement, even the Bible Apostle Story, there is constant juggling for power, social position, to be the taker, not the giver. Any disfellowshipping, or disciplining is a welcome event to bolster one's own stature. Bad actors too. The worst scene in my memory was the extreme glee on a brother's face, when his own fleshly brother had to step down as an elder. There is a biblical warning about Our Father watching, taking note of rejoicing at one's enemy's misfortune, but many JWs deep down dont really believe that, or care.

  • Incognigo Montoya
    Incognigo Montoya

    G-zus, you've got a crazy family

  • ScenicViewer
    Why do some JWs love seeing others get disfellowshipped?

    Because in a perverted way it makes them feel superior.

    Jehovah's Witnesses believe they are the only true religion. They have God's blessing and no one else does. They are doing God's will and no one else is. They will be in the New System and no one else will. Etc, etc.

    For some of them the feeling of being superior doesn't stop there and they eventually begin to "cannilbalize" each other in the sense that they take pleasure in another being brought down, even one of their own. Most wouldn't let it show, perhaps even appearing to be heart broken about a disfellowshipping, but the feeling is there.

    "So and so is disfellowshipped and I'm faithful."

  • john.prestor

    It's sadistic, that's what it comes down to. The organization teaches them to anticipate 'wicked' people dying at Armageddon, and it's not hard to let that kind of thinking spill over into other areas of your life.

  • WTWizard

    One time I like to see it is when the person deserves bad luck. They keep making my life miserable, they are always on me for stupid things and trying to alter every detail of my life (including the color of my shirt), and then they wonder why I think it's funny when they get disfellowshipped. That means a break for me--and, when they get reinstated, they are almost always right back to their abuse.

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