Emotional Bankruptcy after the Tower
hello esmerelda thank you for that inspiring post. not much i can add here that i'm sure you wouldn't already know about i suppose. there was a period for a few years in my life - after exit ramping off of spiritual paradise just around the next bend highway - i was just a shell - totally empty inside - almost inhumane - when you've been sinking for a long time - it gets hard to tell when you hit the bottom - and have begun to bounce back to the top - all i can say - is you do get through it - the way i got through it was to live with it - accept it - the depression or whatever you wanted to call it -
respected the depression - which i still do whenever i feel that way
thanks es you're a champ goo.
Essie, this is my first post to you although I have read a lot of your posts. You definitely have a gift. Relish in it. I agree with Francoise, that it would be great if you could get published and be on Oprah, or The Today Show or Larry King, or whatever.
Wasasister, I also agree with a lot of the points you made as well.
Of the only-child class
I will live richly, because I stubbornly insist that beneath my pain, is the capacity to give love,
and receive it.
Good, keep insisting it--and believe it. I see proof of that in each and every one of your posts.
Here's hoping today will be a better day for you.
Yes, we can blame years as JW's for some of it, but we are also products of our parents (not all of what they did to us was religiously influenced), our physical bodies, our experiences, our intellect (or lack thereof), our relationships, our individual chemistry.
I completely agree with you. Sure the jw's mindset did a number on us - some for decades. So did my first husband when he left me with 3 small children and no money. So on and so on.
But then just imagine the baby with birth defects, with normal intelligence, whose parents refuse to keep him. Been cases like that, and the kids not only survive, but thrive on their own strength of being. There's also been cases where the next child in identical situation dies.
The difference? Sometimes it's us. We can if we want to - an incredible amount of times in our lives. If we can't overcome the obstacle - we learn to go around it and keep going. With/without help to survive because there's still joy in life.
Or perhaps the persistent will to live.
Some men refuse to die so as not to allow satisfaction to the surviving bastards. Author Unknown at present.
The more the WTBTS demoralizes those who leave - it sends a strong message to those still in - stay with Mother, you'll be happier than those people.
That truly was a beautiful post.
You said in you last paragraph, "I hope to get to the point where such reminders are unnecessary, but I doubt that will happen. In the meantime, let's tell each other. We're attracted to this place because we can't yet manage on our own. We need the interaction with people who have been through what we have to one extent or another. People who can laugh at the same inside jokes and make us feel less alone in our struggle. It must be what the Ugly Duckling felt like when he finally found the right pond."
Hang in their, Es. After all, you're still YOUNG!
I this devilish one agrees 100%.
To add my thoughts, there have been millions upon millions who have managed their own by simply not letting other persons control their lives. Be it religions or whatever we must be the masters of our ship, as Comp would say. The person here on this board are no different. By focusing on the positive side of life and not the negative is the best advice I can give to all. Negativism keeps one in bondage to oneself and allows other a vehicle of control.
What we need to do, and I am not telling you anything you do not already know, is love people but love ourselves first.
I am sure I speak of all in saying, thanks again sis for such a good
and encouraging post.