Im always afraid
BlackWolf, keep us informed of what you do.
OK I will :)
JWDaughter - thanks for info. Hard to believe in this day and age young people don't have access to school psychologists. Maybe the district have them on staff and school's have to request/schedule for students -- it's just plain wrong not to. I know many schools here have them but they could rotate to various schools around the valley.
I think they should be in every classroom to help children!
JWDaughter -- long day -- sorry, I see you indicated they give referrals. Unreal - too many children need help.
paradisebeauty - "You can only get close to him when you are alone with him."
It sounds like you are suffering from depression, which is nothing to be embarrassed about. If you don't have depression in this messed up world that wouldn't be normal.
You're depression might not even have anything to do with your upbringing or religion. It may be something you've inherited, so you need to have it treated no matter what you do. Being mentally ill can make you feel things that are not real and feelings and emotions that are not normal. It is simply a chemical imbalance. Certain chemicals in your brain don't get released enough and it makes you feel down, depressed, and even suicidal.
You need to try and see a therapist. They can give you medications that can balance these feelings out.
Don't try and fix this yourself. You need to ask for help!
You are 16! Your feelings relate to the hormonal changes your body is going through.
Worry about doing your best in school, your house chores, your sports at school, etc.
Stuff so heavy as whether a God exists or not, spiritual crap or any other heavy subjects should not be your concerns at all!
Here is how I look at it. Logically, did the boogeyman in your closet turn out to exist once you Were older than twelve?
How are you doing today?
Let us know please
Thinking of you