Feel Like Cryin'

by mackey 25 Replies latest jw friends

  • jgnat
    She is very vulnerable and It is only a matter of time before someone tries to take advantage of that. I sometimes wish I could give up, but my heart will not allow It. Unlike a witness, I trust my heart and let It guide me.

    I sense you are a very devoted man. I can relate to that. I think it is a mistake to try and wrench her from her beliefs by using the intellectual approach. You were drawn to each other because of they way you feel. You may win her back by speaking from your heart.

    Drop the WT quotes for a while. Since she is not ready to listen, it simply wounds her. From the way my honey is acting, I would say the WTS is closing ranks ever more severely this last month. She is feeling that by chosing you, she is chosing death itself.

    Just love her.

    When she is ready to hear it, she will ask.

  • mackey

    I knew what I was In for when I fell for Sarah.Unfortunatly, I am a stubborn jackass. Believe me, I wish I could move on, find someone else, awaken from this nightmare, but my heart just won't allow me to yet. I can be patient, just need some positive reinforcement to keep me going. By the way, the ring I gave her wasn't an engagement ring. It was just a very expensive token of affection.

  • Will Power
    Will Power

    Mackey, (((HUG)))))

    In your story, if you were to reverse the hes & shes, you'd have written most of my story. The stacks of stuff, the old original WT books, even leaving my job!

    A few differences

    1. We've already been married many, many years. This cult can grab hold and change a person into something not recognizable to long time family & friends. Very very sad but the fact that you are not married, or have children seems to be, although extremely hard - a blessing in disguise.

    2. I've already learned that JWs look upon their own rags as an attack upon their god. ANY quote that contradicts what they THINK they are supposed to believe has been somehow satanically reproduced. Classic is "Is Jesus your Mediator." No matter how much time goes by the reaction is the same.

    A few things I've learned.

    They will always choose loyalty to the Watchtower over ANY loved one if pushed.

    Never use the word "Watchtower". (actually, if you say W instead of Watchtower you may get a chance to complete your sentence. Using the letter instead of the word seems to get by their stopthink vocab.)

    ASK questions & bring attention to things when ever you see them that are "godly" (the world is FULL of many examples)

    like OTHERS that .... protest war, (and are persecuted for it) unselfish charitable acts, (by those who do not ask what god they worship first) fantastic discoveries (the world needs people who use their god given brain) etc.

    Moral dilema stories - ask questions.

    ABOVE ALL, the love you show far out weighs the superficial love they receive at a KH or their "group only" god. Their god (who they go to great lengths to dissect, separate, and distance) does not value them as an individual. Every human wants and cherishes "individual" love. Even tho they can't give it, hopefully they will notice when they get it.

    Eventually I hope to beat this cult with love. That is my plan anyway. Let him see & decide (the man must make the decisions eh?) Just hope the WT doesn't get wind of this and print an article about people who just love you to try & get you out! LOL but I wouldn't be surprised.

    Mackey, I feel what you are going thru, is it worth it? I don't know, only you can decide, heck I can't even decide sometimes. It is a LONG haul, one which coould rear its ugly head again years from now.

    Take care, Will

  • MegaDude


    Been there, done that, got the t-shirt as they say. I felt as strongly as you do now. I spent years reaching out to my ex....years and years. In the end, it was a waste of time. Biggest head game I ever participated in.

    She's made a choice and it doesn't include you. Perhaps it will later, but maybe not. I do not believe this woman is who you imagine her to be. And obviously her ties to the Watchtower Society, whatever the reasons, are stronger than her feelings for you. Sad, but true. Take all the time you need to accept it.

    To devote yourself to someone whose Watchtower-implanted fear is greater than any love they have for you is a trip to hell. There are plenty of posters here who can attest to that, whether they are spouses or family or friends. I hope you have the courage to give yourself a time limit on how much time you're willing to invest in a relationship where you have been dismissed. I am not saying give up right away, but just don't throw away too much time.

  • wannaexit


    Could you accept her just as she is. Put the beliefs aside. Among JW there are many so-called divided family that function very well. As time goes on many JW 's are realizing that this organization is not what it says it is. I think that in the next little while many will realize on their own. Change has to come from within. It cannot be forced on you by someone else. Believe me, my husband tried opening my eyes for years. I had to see things myself.

    If you really want her, you may need to accept her with her baggage.


  • Brandy5


    I'm so sorry. This cilt sucks big time. It is so hard to see that while you are an active dub. My hear goes out to you. I pray that Sarah will come to know the truth about the so called truth.

    My heart goes out to you.


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