Paint, Barney, and Jehovah

by John Aquila 29 Replies latest jw experiences

  • John Aquila
    John Aquila

    I made a quick run to Lowes to buy some paint and ran into a brother. He is one of those elders that is VERY, VERY, petty. If he drops by your house unexpected and notices that your kids are watching one of the Star Wars movies, he will counsel you for allowing your kids to watch any movie that has to do with “WAR” He will then make sure you are not recommended for any privilege.

    Anyway when I ran into him, I called him (BARNEY) which is not his name. But there’s a story behind that. At one point in the past, a family visited the Kingdom Hall and was introduced to him and one of the small kids called him Barney. The little kid told his parents he looked like Barney. Aka Barney and friends-TV. Of course everyone laughed and the whole family kept calling him BARNEY. Of course this didn’t fit well with the elder because he feels he is real good looking.

    So when I called him Barney, he reminded me that wasn’t his name. So he sees my beard and starts counseling me on just about everything. To every point he makes I respond with the words, “I understand BARNEY.” And he kept correcting me that his name is NOT BARNEY.

    After a while he gets annoyed and rebukes me, and tells me, I keep telling you my name but you keep calling me BARNEY, and it’s very annoying. I tell him, “I’m sorry, it’s just that since that time that the family kept calling you Barney it has kind of stuck. And for some reason when I see you I just feel very comfortable using that name.

    He says, well don’t. Otherwise I’m just going to stop responding to you when you call me by another name---UNDERSTAND---

    I say, “You know I think I do understand, it’s like the name Jehovah, the Society has always told us that it is not the correct pronunciation but, since everyone is using it and is familiar with it, it’s ok to use it.

    He looks at me with his mouth wide open.

    Then I ask him, “Do you think maybe that why all the Witnesses died in that crash going to a convention in Nigeria a few years back? I’m sure when they saw the accident coming they started praying to Jehovah. Maybe God got upset they kept calling him by the wrong name?

    He turned around and walked away.

    I was tempted to yell out, “See you later BARNEY”

    But I was afraid he might turn back and punched me out.

  • ToesUp
    That's funny. Good for you. I would have yelled out, "See you later Barney." Just for kicks!
  • bsmart
    Love this! Soo appropriate.
  • steve2

    Your story was funny up until your citing of the Nigerian vehicle crash when it veered off course and became tasteless.

    Cheap laughs over dead people in Africa. Would you have cited this tragedy if you had known any of the victims?

    Using that tragic experience to make your point seems gratuitous. I'd have walked away as well.

  • John Aquila
    John Aquila

    Cheap laughs over dead people in Africa.

    It wasn't for cheap laughs, it was to get him to think. Which I believe was successful. He just called me to offer an apology for walking away without a word.

    Would you have cited this tragedy if you had known any of the victims?

    Always do with the tragedies in my area, and it works even better, They start questioning.

    I notice in your posts you are very sensitive to many things.

  • Vidiot

    One thing I learned early on in life is that the more shit you take from people, the more shit they'll give you.

    I made up my mind right then that I would no longer take shit from people, and it served me well.

    If anyone in any congregation I ever attended tried to bully me, they only ever tried it once.

  • blondie

    I thought Barney Fife..............

    Image result for barney fife

  • steve2

    I notice in your posts you are very sensitive to many things.

    A very good observation so thanks: I am.

  • millie210

    I love you, / You love me / We're a happy family /

    just humming along.....

    Great post John!

  • sparrowdown

    Sounds like Barney felt you weren't showing him the respect and reverence he is used to and feels he deserves.

    That's what it boils down to for many of these guys they want people to grovel to them and defer to them for divine guidance if they deel theybare higher up on the totem pole than you.

    They hate it when you treat them like a regular guy.

    My COBE was a dead ringer for Waldo/Wally from Where's Wally.

    I told him that once in a joking manner and the look on his face was " how daaarre yoouu!!"

    I thought, get over yourself mate, you're only a legend in your own lunchtime.

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