Yoga-gate 2001

by Esmeralda 16 Replies latest jw friends

  • myMichelle

    Hi Es,

    If I'm happy, I must be doing something wrong, right? *lol*

    Clearly, you are in league with Lucifer! I bet if we threw you in water (a la Salem witch trial) that you would swim instead of sinking and drowning like one of God's innocent lambs.

    sit around in our livingroom and watch Star Trek, the Next Generation

    Another sign of your fallen state, an obsession with alien characters endorsing other belief structures. Woe befall you when we consider that awful Vulcan race with their pointy ears.

    LOL! Tell them not only do you do yoga, but you burn incense while doing it and that you do yoga in the nude. See if you pop any blood vessels. Nosey people.


  • Kristen

    Hmmm, and here I thought yoga was that little green wrinkly character from the Empire Strikes Back.

    Es, since I've been reading your posts about yoga I'm becoming more intrigued. If you tell me that I don't need to cross my legs above my head to do it right, I think I'd like to learn more about it. I'm glad to hear how much it's helping you. Boy, all the great things we get to look into when we are no longer under the influence of you-know-what.


  • Esmeralda

    *ROFL* conflicted, Michelle and Kristen! You guys are cracking me up. I'm so glad
    I started this silly thread I knew I could use a laugh this week and I'm glad you guys could too :)

    The wrinkly guy from Empire...I thought that was Yogurt? Yes, he's my yoga guru. We hang
    out in gnarled old trees and he inspires me...
    "That face you make. That leg, up over your head must go, or suffer the wrath of the dark side you
    will." *ROFLMAO*

    Honestly, Kristen I couldn't do that if I tried. Thats why I love the relaxation tape I got.
    It's not a work out, it's stretching and unwinding. That is exactly what I needed. You don't
    exert yourself and you don't break a sweat. If you did, I couldn't do it because raising the
    body temperature of an MS patient is the quickest way to short circuit us (long medical explaination
    for that, but anyhoo)

    Yes, my name is Es, and I'm a yoga loving trekkie. My, how far I've fallen from grace...I'm such a disgrace
    to my family...

    keep those comments coming folks, best laugh I've had in awhile. Are you sure none of you
    were elders at my old hall? *lol*

    I'm too brain fried to say anymore. I've said too much already, I'm off to bed. I have to concur with you, is a great world on the outside :)

    love ya all

  • Tina

    Eating her Yogurt while sitting in the lotus position,,,,Es and all,you guys have me rolling LOL,T

  • RedhorseWoman

    Es, seriously.....what is the matter with your thinking? Why, everyone knows that the best exercise in the world can be obtained by walking house to house in field service! Forget about those hours in the car and at the coffee shop.....forget them....yessssss.......forget them. Jehovah's people are not only the happiest doggone people in the world, they're also the healthiest and fittest goddamn people in the whole frickin' world, by crackey.....yessiree!!!

    Yoga will only open your mind to demon possession. I should know....I added some simple Yoga routines to my weight training workout about a month ago, and look what happened to me.....I think I'm a goddess fer gawd's sake!! Just ask Waiting, she'll tell you how warped I am. Don't let this happen to you. Would you like me to check the Runes and see if you've crossed into the danger zone yet?

    In all seriousness, I'm glad that you've found something that's helpful for you. I have bad knees, and a lot of aerobics exercises are too strenuous for me. Between the weight training and the Yoga, however, I'm feeling better and stronger than I ever have in my life.

  • conflicted

    Yoga, Star-trek, meditation.... AND NOW RUNES!!!

    OMIGAWD! I think this is an apostle site... a prostate, whatever.

    This must end!

    Here is a little slice of conflicted's life:

    Picture me sitting on my yard-sale sofa, arm around my non-believer wife watching star wars in my speedracer t-shirt. Not a single piece of JW literature in sight - I'm content and happy - meditating about how grand it is to be free.

    This must be why the JW's never visit me - They can practically see the demon infestation I live with.

  • joelbear

    Dear Esmerelda,

    Next time they start picking on you and your daughter, send them the url to my web site and say.

    Sure I may be __________________ but at least I'm not a homosexual, nudist, atheist, bad poet, etc. etc. etc. Would you rather have HIM as a daughter, I mean son?



Share this