Chillin' in the Baptism Line

by metatron 17 Replies latest jw friends

  • Esmeralda

    Oh, a story from my baptism that I forgot to add...

    I was a babe, merely 12 years old when I decided that getting baptized was the only
    way to get in line to the new system to have the chance to see my dear grandfather again
    (he'd passed on three months before, and I still cry to this day about it, seventeen years

    I got in the pool, was dunked, and then heard "Sister, Sister!"

    I didn't even turn around LOL I was nearly out of the pool before they tapped my shoulder
    and said something I will never forget.

    Anyone here ever seen the Lewis Black routine where he talks about hearing the
    stupidest sentence you've ever heard...and not being able to think about it
    for more then a few seconds because if you do, you're sure to die of an aneurism?

    This was one of those kinds of sentences.

    I was told: "Your hair didn't go under all the way."

    My hair was down to my, well anyway I felt the top and it felt wet to me! But they insisted.

    "We don't want it on our conscience if you weren't baptized properly, please come back so
    we can do it again."

    and they DID!

    Like god would have kept me out of the kingdom for being 'only mostly baptized'...

    Twice dunked, and still just as out *lol*

    p.s. if they'd said "Do you know that you're pledging your life to an organization
    of old guys who can change their opinions at will and insist you follow...or you'll
    lose your family and almost everyone you love?" How many of us would have gotten into
    the pool!!!

  • mommy

    ROFLOL! That is too funny! I have seen them do that several times, and always rolled my eyes at it. Thanks for sharingI guess it is further prove that the JW are the true religion
    Welcome to the board Metatron!
    I for one was a late bloomer, I was baptized at 17 just a few months from 18. I wanted the truth to be my own, before I did the dunk. I have always felt very strongly about things, and didn't want to be baptized without believing in it 100% The day arrived and I was so nervous, I couldn't eat, I couldn't concentrate. And I cried the whole morning sevice. I cried while I changed into my suit and appropriate cover-up (that came to my knees) One of you guys asked what hall I was from but I don't remember your face. I even let several people ahead of me. I was th elast one to be baptized.
    You see I didn't want to be baptized. I knew in my heart this wasn't the truth. I was being pressured into this by several people. Long story, maybe another day. Anyway, the point I was trying to make was I know I didn't want to be in the line. I wish someone had told me I didn't have to be there. I know I went through the questions already, but really until I was dunked I didn't have to do it. I could have walked away. What people expected from me were just expectations on their part, and should not have swayed my own heart.
    Even if we are to be married we can make a decision to wait...even on the day. If can only imagine what you saw walking through that line. Thanks for sharing this with us.

  • Flip
    When will the gnarled old theocrats ever wake up and
    see what a fraud they rule over?

    Whom ever it is that actually controls the purse strings of the WTBTS, have clued in on that fact (in the dialog by Harrison Ford) “for a long, long…long…..long…………….long time”.

    The Governing Geezers of Brooklyn Heights stumbled upon a “gold mine” that simply became too damned lucrative to give up. Now the “bean counters” have really taken over.

    Metatron, “Welcome back, Your dreams were your ticket out. Welcome back, To that same old place that you laughed about.”


  • Thirdson

    Hi Metatron,

    Welcome to the board, good to have you aboard.

    Welcome BlueSaph (Bin) too. How's your sister doing, is she still in?


    'To avoid criticism, say nothing, do nothing, be nothing'

  • Galapogos


    whatever! Your just practicing to be intelligent; better work a little harder.

    Your patronage is stale, and you seem even less authentic.

    P.S. If I am the "young'n" why can't you spell?

    I get pained at always seeing people blaming others for their aches and disquietude. That seems to be all I see on this site. People pretending to be victorious as they spill there ugliness anywhere but the mirror.

    May your peace be big

    Exit stage left

  • Carmel

    Hey Met,

    You struck home here! I remember standing in line in late March freezin my shriveled up gonads off waiting my turn. Trouble is, I was only 12 and had been pushed by family and their peers to dip me. Kind of like a poor little woolie getting the sheep-dip treatment. Assured it would be to my benefit, I did my thing much like you described. Boy did it open my eyes! That was the begining of the end for me and the Borg.

    Carmel, who thinks he may take a hop over to the GALOPOGOS IS and shoot some funny looking lizzards

  • hippikon

    Hi Met Wellcome

    I think this dunking thing is most unhygenic I was in a long line and by the time it was my turn the water in the little tub was brown and smelt. I got the flu of course and was sick for two weeks after.

  • larc


    I got baptized at the age of 10. I was not talked into it. In fact, my mother thought I should wait, but I reassured her that I was ready to dedicate my life to Jehovah. I memories were of very happy people when they got baptized, so my experience is different from those expressed here. I am no longer a Witness, but I do remember how it was for me. It was very special.

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