Ok so I am home this morning finishing a paper for class (that has to be turned in by five--shh! No procrastination comments please--focus on the topic!) when the doorbell rings.
I have a wet head cuz I just out of the shower 20 minutes before, and I am in full lounging wear. I really don't want to go answer the door but I think -- OOOH! MAYBE IT"S THE UPS MAN WITH MY SECRET SANTA GIFT!
It wasn't.
Instead it was a car group of 'Hovahs. The doors must have been slow to open this morning so they came to visit my parents.
I come up stairs to see the mother of all weirdness peering into my house. She has her face pressed against the windo, shielding her eyes so she can see in.
Now I haven't been to a meeting in nearly two years. Bad me! Suffice to say she was surprised to see me.
"ohh...hi...(stuttered out hello)...are your parents home?"
"Nope! (me in as cheery a voice as possible) Mom's at work, and dad is out walking the dog."
I notice she is staring at my chest. Sister un-married Hovah freak is harboring lesbian tendencies? What the! And then I remember. I am wearing my Navy t-shirt that I got from a worldy BOY who was IN THE NAVY! The horror! That and I wasn't wearing a bra cuz I am a hippie freak and let's just say it's a wee bit tit nipply in Minnesota these days. How unchristian of me!
I continued to smile at her, and said "Well my dad should be back soon..." pausing as if to say, so come and wait if you want knowing damn well they would never be caught alone with a no bra wearing apostate girl. (By the way, I have never been disfellowshipped nor disassociated. So there is no reason they couldn't come in and talk to me, perhaps see how I am doing, see if I still keep the faith, if I think about Jehovah, and if I still pray, pff she didn't even ask how my Bible reading is coming along!!)
She backpeddles away from the door as if Satan himself were perched on my shoulder. And calls over her shoulder as she nearly runs back to her car "no, we better go, we'll try another day when your parents are home."
No, "Oh hey, how are you, we have missed you" hell if she just would have said "we'd like to invite you to a meeting on sunday", she could have counted her time. Hee hee. Oh well, they probably would have counted it anyway if they came in and yakked with my parents for half an hour.
Oh well I thought. I must get back to listening to my rock music, studying my secular school work, and posting on an apostate message board. Hee hee!