Any advice what to do? (page 2)

metatron

Tell them you are depressed, then make all kinds of promises about returning
and don't keep them.

Passive resistance is the right way to counter these creeps. Keep telling them
about depression and they'll give up.

metatron

I can only tell you what CC and I did. We were in the exact situation as yourself! After months and months of them hounding us, we finally told them to leave us alone, that we weren't going to meet with them. They gave us a dead line, told us if we didn't meet with them, then they would assume we had disassociated ourselves, which they announced later the next week. If I had it to do over, I would have told them that from the very beginning. It would have saved us a lot of time and distress. No more having to worry who's at the door or who's on the phone, ya know! It's like they're on a witch hunt. They literally make me sick!

Let us know what you decide to do, k?

Keep us posted!

Tink

Smoldering Wick

metatron,

That does work. But, then they'll say..."we all get depressed at times...you just need to pray more, rely on Jehovah, and get back to the meetings & field service." (that's the JW cure for depression lol)

Cecil,

You could tell them you have a rare social phobia and just the thought of stepping into a Kingdom hall throws you into convulsions....or you've developed a severe allergy to monotonous speakers that causes you to go into Anaphylactic Shock whenever you hear the word Armageddon.

~Wick

Edited by - Smoldering Wick on 22 November 2002 12:56:36

Kingpawn

You are faced with a choice and neither one is pleasant. Cut yourself off from your relatives or save yourself the stress of continually dodging the elders.

It wouldn't be much of a choice for me. Due to certain chronic health conditions I have to avoid stress. But I was the only JW in my family and I wasn't particularly close to anyone in the congregation so it was easy for me to ignore them.

I wish you luck in trying to leave with the least amount of pain, but I think the odds against you succeeding are very high.

Shakita

Mulan:

Yes, I know. I will deal with that when it comes, I guess.

If they decide to d/a us, there will be nothing that we will be able to do then. We just refuse to play their game. We will not be put on trial. If they judge others on their silence or absence, then this is a no-win situation.

I have spoken with our family members still "in." When first learning the truth about "the lies" I talked with these family members. I asked them point blank .. If I was to be d/f'd, would you not speak with me? They knew about my questioning all the JW history. My family members said that they would never shun me. I believe them.

We have been through this before with other family members. They were confronted with calls and visits. But, they never played the game. Finally, the elders backed off. They have never been d/a'd. I guess it all comes down to how aggressive your congregation, elders, or CO is in dealing with those who want to fade.

Mrs. Shakita

Mulan

Yes, every congregation and elders are different. So much for the worldwide unity, eh?

I am glad you have that kind of a family. I do too. My brother was df'd in 1978, and Mom has never cut him off. I did.................boy do I regret those lost years..................17 of them. He missed my children growing up, and I missed his. We are all together now though!!

Your points, are exactly why we don't da ourselves. I refuse to make it easy for them.

Shakita

Mulan:

I am happy for you and your family. I hope that one day, for the sake of the divided JW families, the WTBS becomes more mainstreamed and will declare some "new light" that does away with the d/a and d/f arrangement. Who knows? They have seen "new light" in many other areas...like organ transplants. This, of course, does not free them from all the blood guilt they have heaped upon themselves, but it will alleviate some of the pain for families to repair what they have lost.

Cecil:

Try not to be afraid. They are like wild animals, they will sense that fear and ATTACK! I personally don't know how these "men from God" can sleep at night knowing how they hurt people and destroy families! You will be in my thoughts tomorrow. Take care.

Mrs. Shakita

cecil

Hi larc, cruzanheart, Mulan, Shakita, Smoldering Wick, metatron, Tinkerbell4125, Kingpawn!

Thank you for your advice - we will consider it well. Unfortunately I have been quite frank towards some brothers I have known (or should I say: I thought I knew...?!) for decades about my doubts and problems regarding the WTS and my wife is not the kind of person that keeps her feelings in thta regard a secret either. The only reason we have done the "hiding" for some 14 months are our families, who are still in. We are now at a point where we have to find out, if we want to keep on hiding (fading away) - which we feel is against our nature - or if the time has come to "face the facts". We'll know in ca. 18 hours from now... and will keep you updated

/cecil

Xandria

Almost makes you want to invite them in and give them a spiked muffin ( spiked with superlax). With strong coffee, that would be the shortiest meeting ever. .o0( hum, I wonder if that is why mormons are against coffee intake ?)

Anyway, sending you hopeful wishes on a good out come to this.

Xandria

Mulan

We just very much want to NOT do it their way. They would like nothing more than for us to make it easy for them. We can't do that. It's very much against my nature.

Any advice what to do?

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