Kudos: for those of you who awakened with you significant others. You are so LUCKY!!!

by goingthruthemotions 17 Replies latest jw experiences

  • goingthruthemotions

    Like the title says....those of you who made it out with you husbands or wives. you people are so LUCKY!!!

    Lucky because your wife or husband isn't brain dead and can think and reason for themselves. Your Lucky because love of a spouse or marriage is more important than a freaking cult.

    I wish i was in your situation....just looking in my rearview mirror and leaving the past behind us has we ride on to brighter horizons.

    No such luck for me....my wife lacks the ability to reason or think for herself....she put the GB with God and Jesus themselves. kinda like live gods on earth.

    she physically covers her ears like a 2 year old when she hears negative comments about the BORG. and the more i pull away the entrenched she becomes.


    My Marriage is and has been crumbling before my eyes and there is not a damn thing i could do to stop it. It is painful to watch. i hate what this cult has done to my families life.....i wish the BORG would implode.

    so you to you all who made it out wiith you family intact and marriages in tact....YOU ARE SOOOO LUCKY. COUNT YOUR LUCKY STARS. BECAUSE I HAVE NONE.

  • TheListener

    I am really sorry to hear about your situation goingthruthemotions. I know it doesn't help a lot but you're not alone. Even for those of us whos spouse didn't wake up but also isn't a complete WT drone have had our relationship changed and aren't the same. It's painful and it hurts to watch a relationship get damaged or completely crumble over religion.

    Please hang in there and keep sharing your thoughts on the board because you're not alone. There are so many here that have lost so much - this can be a great place of sharing and healing.

  • Tornintwo

    I have a fingers in the ears spouse too, I feel your pain...

    im just learning tatt so I'm zealous about it, especially this week with the Australian royal commission but he won't even read a newspaper article about it, it is maddening isn't it?

    having said that I had a bit of an epiphany this week, he became very depressed to the point of not functioning because I'd managed to get some stuff through to him that I think caused C.D. He had an awful childhood and a very early adult difficult life and I think he feels Jehovah/the org saved him. I'm honestly not sure he could cope mentally with awakening.

    So I've decided to back off, agree to disagree and focus on positive non jw aspects of our marriage, kids, eating out together, movies, sex etc... Try to be a good wifey, the only time that will be difficult is when we clash on parenting, but I hope to be the voice of reason&balance for the kids when it comes to higher education, extracurricular activities and 'worldly' friends, we'll see how that goes?!?!?!

  • Tornintwo
    Omg can I take that back, he's being a jerk this morning! Looks like it's gonna be a crap day.
  • disposable hero of hypocrisy
    disposable hero of hypocrisy
    Bummer, sorry to hear that torn.. I'm just about to go through another indoctrination session for the other half's sake, it sucks donkey balls but it maintains the peace. I'm waiting for curiosity to kick in, I'm sure she'll research for herself eventually...
  • Mickey mouse
    Mickey mouse
    I put it down to part luck and part patience and strategy. I've been through this, I understand the frustration. I can highly recommend the above in this thread.
  • maksutov

    I'm happy for those whose spouse left with them. Also very envious. But I would rather be awake myself and have a poorer marriage than live in ignorance - ignorance is not bliss. I also count myself lucky - my wife is still a WT drone, but not a complete looney, and we have something we can still salvage, at least for now.

    I hope you can find a way to cope with your frustration - we all know the cult has limitless capacity to destroy families, and it is heartbreaking to see it happen before your eyes. My family will never be the same again - my dad has disowned me, and my in-laws avoid me. It sucks, but I still feel lucky to have escaped.

    I don't mean to minimise what you are going through - there was a time when grief, frustration, and anger was threatening to consume me, but in my case I have found some relief by forcing myself to look at things more philosophically and focus on the good that can come from my new-found freedom of thought.

  • jookbeard
    exactly the same thing happened to my jw wife, screaming hysterically , hands over her ears etc, she had other issues affecting her mental health unfortunately, it was a difficult time, I found it incredibly difficult to cope, we divorced in 1995, the marriage lasted 5 years, was a shame.
  • disillusioned 2
    disillusioned 2

    I feel for you and I am going through exactly the same thing with my husband. We don't talk anymore about it, in fact we don't talk much about anything. I feel I am walking on eggshells every day trying not to talk about it. He leaves books out deliberately on table, on bed. Magazines, leaflets. I just put them away but I want to put them in the bin!

    I have so many things I want to say, I am screaming inside. Full of information I can't tell him because I know we would argue and it causes too much stress. It is easier to just go through the motions of everyday life than to forcefully try to get him to listen.

    He has literally no idea about what is going on in Australia or anywhere else for that matter. He only knows and believes what is in their literature and what he hears at the meetings.

  • oppostate


    I'm in your same situation. To me the fact that my wife puts the views, words, and opinions of a any JW elder above mine on anything not just those things related to religion and belief is almost a form of adultery.

    Remember the Scripture about the three thong cord that wouldn't easily be torn in two? Well, the WT's added itself in as a forth thong, and it's chaffing my bum, because this thong is continually getting frizzly frazzled, irritated and progressively becoming irrelevantly redundant in this marriage relationship.

    The marriage vows I spoke were to my wife before God, and they didn't include the WT. How the heck do they dare butt into my marriage relationship and steal away my wife's soul, this brazen, butt-faced, marriage-wrecking Cult!

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