I am not a JW ...however I began having bible studies (I´d call them Watchtower studies). I was beginning to get lured in and brainwashed into accepting the religion as the true religion...but something inside of me told me there was something odd. Some time passes and I was invited to a meeting and I accepted. I am not a long-skirt wearing girl lol...and I did not have time to go out and buy one just for that day. I arrived at the kingdom hall and It just felt so awkward and fake.
Let me elaborate: The atmosphere was not authentic ...there was people smiling at eachother and greeting eachother but I am a very intuitive person (keen sense of perception) and I could just smell the hipocrasy and the fakeness. Like fake "love"
Anyway...i went wearing black pants and a dressy sweater and some boots. I felt like the person that invited me was embarrassed to be seen with me or something because she would like discretely act like she wasn´t with me. And I felt ignored. It just felt so fake. All the sisters would say to eachother is "nice dress".."nice skirt"...and then they´d just look at me and make me feel uncomfortable
Did I mention you could sense the lack of sincerity and love.. I just felt it....a whole bunch of random sisters greeted me and introduced themselves to me...with huge forced smile on their faces. LOL...well that was my first and last meeting. I have not been to a new one. I forgot to mention that before I started bible study with the JW I was an independent bible reader. Anyway one night I decided to I wanted to learn about the history of the JWs but something inside me told me not to that Satan was the one whispering into my ear and that I should not doubt the Watchtower...but guess what I did. And well....I was highly dissappointed because I thought that I had found the truth and I wanted to be baptized. BUT AFTER READING ALL THE HORRIBLE THINGS THEY MAKE PEOPLE GO THROUGH I was like....ummmm.........NO, THANKS.
Anyway that is just my background story. Let´s get to the topic. I met a guy and to my luck he is a JW ....lol. We met in college. He broke my heart when he told me he was dropping out of school because his goals were spiritual.??????? UMMM....I was like are you going to be a bum all your life or something? He just laughs. Anyway he loves me too. He was realllllllly hard to get. What helped me was my beauty. Anyway I grabbed him by surprise one day and kissed him. You would not believeeeeeeeeeeeee everything he told me. He basically called me a fornicator and the devil. LOL...it was a peck and I did it out of love! He made me feel horrible. And I was like there is no where in the bible that says that a kiss is a sin and he came up with the "loose conduct" argument. So I told him "sorry that Satan made me do it" lol. After that he admitted it to me that "a part of him liked it" and that he felt love for me too. He would avoid me at school and keep things short after that., though :( That only made me like him more..lol. So I would hug him and flirt with him at school..but again he would try to avoid me.
Then one day I sent him a sexy pic of myself and he turned into a completely different person. After that we saw eachother and This time he willingly kissed me. It was just that. He then like always felt guilty and bad and told me he had to stay away from me because I was a temptation. I would still message him, though and then I made him a video modeling some boyshorts and he was weakened. When we saw eachother we made out passionately but ofcourse no sex.
Then I saw him again and things got even steamier and we were about to...but I was the one that stopped because...he would probably HATE ME for the rest of his life for seducing him into fornication. He admits he loves me now...but eversince that day he hasn´t spoken to me -____- his guilt trips annoy me really bad. What should I do...or what should I not do? He is a really smart person (academically) and I want to help him get out of the religion before he drops out of school. Help? Suggestions? Opinions?