Can we talk about something deep?

by kenpodragon 29 Replies latest jw friends

  • Beck_Melbourne


    I believe there is room for caution where jw relatives are concerned. I don't know about anyone else...but that's how I treated the situation with my active jw sister and brother. I slowly introduced worldy topics into our conversations, it was kinda subtle...and before I knew it they were laughing along with me and having digs at JW stuff. They are now yes it is sometimes appropriate to share a bit our ordinary worldy lives with them rather then pretend to be indifferent to their jw'ism.


  • kenpodragon

    I try to be sensitive to my JW relatives feelings. As much as I would like to talk about more at times, I do have plenty of people in my life to do that with. No reason to hurt my mom or relatives, they know what and who I am and yet they still talk to me. No need to throw it in their face. I just wish they left more room open to a few deep discussions.

    My thought


  • ozziepost

    Mrs Ozzie and I don't have any of these problems....none of our family or relatives will speak with us. Simple really.

    Cheers, Ozzie

  • Beck_Melbourne

    (((((Ozzie and Mrs Ozzie)))))

    One of these day I'm going to give you and Mrs Ozzie a call on the telephone. You're both too lovely to shun IMO.


  • czarofmischief

    My parents were by far the coolest.

    I remember getting diffed. I had undergone a severe and hasty restructuring of my life in order to avoid expulsion (trying to demonstrate repentance) and they bounced me anyway. I came home in a kind of daze. My mom burst into tears when I told her. Then she hugged me and said, "You are still a good person." My dad was the strong silent type.

    And all through the next year, I lived at home, and they took care of me as I drifted farther and farther out. It was stupid really. The dubs didn't have to diff me. I would have done anything to stay, but they pushed me out, I think, as a power trip, because I was a little different.

    OH well, screw 'em. My parents still loved me, and I return the favor. I am grateful like a dog to them for showing me the love I needed when I needed it most. If they need anything all they have to do is ask, and I'm there mowing the lawn or teaching my sister to drive or whatever they need.

    anyway, I forget... oh yeah... my mom and dad never talk about it much, but my dad was the person to show me from Zechariah where it says that 607 BCE is a made-up number. My dad is really smart, but I wonder why he stays with them. He loves the people, not the organization.

    I guess I initiate the conversations about the religion. My mom just says, "If they aren't the truth, noone else even tries."

    I feel sorry for them. they've spent their lives chasing a dream - and I'm not going to rip it away from them. Let them grow old and die in peace, is my feelings on the subject. If they wanted out, they could get out, but maybe they are happy in the coccoon. their friends are there, their lives are there, let them sleepwalk their remaining years if they want. We all chase different illusions, religion is just one of them.


  • Solace


    I honestly dont think she has e-mailed her cousin since. We keep it casual and usually only see them for family gatherings etc. Talking about the weather may be dull but it sure beats getting into a screaming match over religious doctrines, ya know?

  • kenpodragon


    I agree, and even small talk can have a bounding affect.

    Take Care


  • Scarlet

    Reading this made me cry. I have been doing alot of thinking on this subject lately. I used to call my grandmother everyday and talk to her. It seems like I only call her once or twice a month now and don't really have anything to say. My Mother and I have never had a great relationship that is no secret but it seems it is worse lately. There is just nothing to say. Everytime you say something to them it is just beaten down by there religion. My grandmother was asking me the other day why I am not having childern yet and I told her I want to fulfill my carrer goals first. I want to be able to save enough money to put them through college. Well that didn't go over so well. She knows when I have kids I will be a Witness again and school and education don't matter because the end is almost here. It became a discussion where she just started downing my views on life. I saw then this is why I don't call or stop over. I am really tired of walking on eggshells and not being able to be myself and talk about what is important to me. I just have to listen to them and take it about how I am going to die at armagedon. Between my Mom and Grandma I have heard a million times I will not make it through armagedon and even though they will be sad they will have to live with my choice. I am just glad they are not God and they do not get to judge people. I know I am rambling now but this post just really struck a cord with me. I have been pondering over this all week. Thank you for posting this thread.

    Edited by - Scarlet on 25 October 2002 19:21:35

  • kenpodragon


    Thank you for your thought ... I think you can use a hug too


    I know they are just online symbols, but they do have a meaning

    Take Care


  • patio34

    Hi Kenpodragon,

    This is a great thread and I really enjoyed your comparisons to being drunk and the JWs' conversations. I have also wondered what on earth was so interesting about it all. It's great to be "sober"!

    I have run into the same situation with my JW son. We do respectfully stay off subjects we disagree on, but the conversation is very boring. There's so much not to discuss since the WT permeates just about all of their thinking.

    Truthfully, I don't talk to him that often and try to keep it under 15 minutes. It's tiring.


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