Irony of "Rebellious" Youth

by Pathofthorns 18 Replies latest jw friends

  • Maxee

    Its sometimes difficult to put into words the pain its reassuring others feel the same way


  • katchoo

    this is strange.. I was DF'd partly because I refused to lead a double life. All I wanted to do was go out on a date once in awhile (I did get into some trouble, but I did not feel that it was any of the elders' business whether or not the boy was circumcised!)

    Every other young person in my congregation was sleeping around. I mess up an do it once, and BOOT, I'm out. I also had questions though... they were not prepared for a cute young girl who could THINK and so instead they wouldn't deal with me.

    I find it interesting though that in some congregations, their definition of "rebellious" is ridiculous. "Rebellion" to them is demanding to be able to pick out your own clothes...forget smoking and drinking and sex. And the most dysfunctional, spaced out, (read "spiritual") children are held up as examples, making life harder for them because not only are they now supposed to be perfect, but now the rest of the congregation's young people hate them and will not hardly even speak to them.

    It's a very sick way to raise a child, and No child of mine will ever attend a JW meeting (With my mother of course, I would NEVER darken the door of a KH again) until he/she is at least 16-- old enough to at least think for themselves.


  • waiting

    Excuse me, Katchoo,

    "every other young person in my congregation was sleeping around."

    Probably not.......maybe some, even, most, but every is a very pointed statement.

    Having been before elders myself, attitude is everything. The "crime" is not the most significant thing under discussion. Your attitude is.

    Look at the new, and changing every moment, view of blood transfusions.

    1. A moment of weakness - and it has been compared to immorality (a weakness).

    2. Repent.
    3. Given spiritual help.
    4. Forgiven.
    5. You live, body & spirit (JW style).

    1. A moment of weakness,
    2. Do not repent.
    3. Spiritual "guidance" given.
    4. "assume to have dissociated" yourself.
    5. You live, body & spirit (your private style).

    Edited by - waiting on 17 June 2000 16:35:56

  • SolidSender

    The diversity human of human experience/expression does not fit into the narrow, confined, claustrophobic, little box otherwise known as the JW mindset. Their insistent, compulsive, disturbing obsession with conformity to WTBS regulation thoroughly negates any claims they make that Jesus Christ and all he stood for ever existed. Love, as a motive doesn’t stand inside the “organization”. They made sure of that a long time ago. That a person people can act in a way contrary to what he/she claims to believe does not, personally, bother me. I’m not expecting human nature to really make that much sense or want everyone on earth to be a clone of myself like the “organization” does. One thing that used to get to me, being a witness, was all this continual astonishment that problems existed, as if conflict wasn’t supposed to be a part of life. The problem is people who think that there shouldn’t be problems, who insist on dichotomizing the world. - SolidSender

  • SolidSender

    Typo above - sentence should read - Love as a motive doesn't stand a chance inside the "organisation".
    thanks - SolidSender

  • katchoo

    no, waiting. I am serious.
    One of the elders that was on my committee went to high school with me. I had SEEN her skipping school with several different boys and I also knew for a fact that she was pregnant. Her father did not know that at the time of my judicial meeting, but he found out later and told my mother that he was sorry for what that committee did to me. His daughter did not even get reproved.

    A girl who used to be my best friend skipped school the day before graduation with her boyfriend (from another congregation) and she called me up later to tell me how great the sex had been. Then she asked me to buy her a pregnancy test three weeks later because she was scared to do it herself. She was acting really weird because she was afraid she was pregnant too, and her mother caught on. Soon she was in front of the elders and what did she do? Tell them that she was sorry but that she thought it was okay because she saw me at the movies with some friends at school. Not only did they buy this load of crap, they called me into a meeting for that. I told them that it was rediculous to accuse me of being the reason my friend was sleeping around, adn they agreed.

    Around this time it came out that this girl's mother had been sleeping with another (married) brother in the congregation for FOURTEEN YEARS. Neither of them were even reproved either.

    Another elder in teh cong. had two daughters, the youngest of whom ended up pregnant from a boy at school that same year, and her older sister was sleeping with a boy from another congregation (she told me as much herself).

    So you see, I was not lying when I said everybody else was having sex. I had sex once. it was not planned, I felt horrible about it, and I said as much. I said that if I could go back and change it, I would never do it. Luckily he had a condom and I did not run teh risk of getting pregnant, so I was lucky. But they said because HE had had a condom in his wallet, that it was "premeditated" and that I was unrepentant because I would not tell them whether or not he was circumcised or whether I had had an orgasm.

    But the main topic of our discussion that evening was whether I was demonized because I have a certain defect (or something) in my sight which allows me to see "energy" or something resembling auras around people and animals (and some plants) I do not know why I see these things, but I have since I was a child. I don't know really what this is or why I see it, but I know that it is not demons! Doctors have compared it to the Keynesian auras that have been photographed. (This is a medical phenomenon, not demonic possession, jeez!!)

    THAT is what I was DF'd for, because I steadfastly denied them details and because I had questions they could not answer (such as if the Society is from God, why can;t we read anything it doesn;t write? If it were right, it could stand up to criticism, right?) and they thought I was demonized and just would not admit it.

    So there you have it-- I just thought that needed a little clarification.


  • Roamingfeline


    It sounds like they were witch-hunting (figuratively!). They had no right to ask you lurid details. That was totally uncalled for. Those auras you see are the natural energy fields that eminate from people. Some have MORE fields of energy than others, and you can even FEEL it when they walk into a room. It's a totally natural phenomenon, and not demonic whatsoever! Sickos, they are.


  • mgm

    All your examples show me one point:

    For all this teenagers the religion is more a mechanical, than a heard thing. Most of those youngs just don't really have a deep, close relationship to god. They are witnesses, because they don't know anything else and don't wanna hurt the parents and family.
    That's why double lifes are so common among young witnesses.
    Just right now there are two young couples, which separat after only a few years marriage life. The two young women wanna have a break from the "truth" also. Why that?
    Wouldn't it be more logical to stick even more to the religion in such difficult times??
    Or is it a good and welcome chance to leave?

  • waiting

    Dear Katchoo,

    Thanks for your post. You certainly did have a lively congregation, huh? When my daughter was disfellowshipped, she was straight up with the elders - that doesn't really bode well - I think they are more comfortable with tears.

    She is an incest and molestation survivor. Tears and emotions do not come easily for her. At the time, she was quite disconnected emotionally from everyone. After divorce, DF'd, therepy, and many years, she is much healthier emotionally.

    I understand what you're saying. I'm sorry for your situation as a child. It sucked.

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