So I was put in the back of a police car....

by Mimilly 39 Replies latest watchtower medical

  • ApagaLaLuz


    I am more than just happy to hear what the outcome was.You my friend, are one lucky lady. 3 years ago my cousin, who had married a JW and was studying, killed himself. I was with him the night before, and he joked with me about suicide. I wish so badly now, that I had had the insight that your guardian angel did. I hold the elders who were working with him during his rough time directly responsible.

    When I first left, I felt like a number had been done on my head. Unfortunately I found solace at the end of a bottle and a joint. I did not reach out though. I have a page in a music book, where I was writting down all the thoughts that were consuming my mind one late night. At that moment I had finally decided I was going to die. Simply because I wanted to finally find out what happens when you die. I cleaned up around the house and wrote one simple note. Luckily I passed out before I could finnish. For a while I thought I was a coward because I didn't have the guts to finnish.

    I kept the pages I wrote that night. Things have been so much better since. I've learned to appreciate every small detail about life. I know that while there is nothing clinically wrong with me, I did hit an all time low. I have never had a time like that since.

    I can sympathize with you..... and I am so happy that you are here today to tell us your story. The amazing thing is, that despite all the bickering and insults, this place is truely wonderful. Most of us don't know each other, but yet still care and have developed relationships. I think that's beautiful....

    Please email anytime


  • RedhorseWoman

    Mimilly, I'm so glad that you were able to get the help you needed. ***HUGS**** Your sense of humor will be a very big asset in getting you through things. I've been where you are now, and all I can tell you is that it CAN get better.

    Cass, I'm so sorry about the loss of your friend.

  • SYN

    Geesh, Mimilly, hope you are OK!

  • FreeFallin


    I'm so sorry for what you're going thru. Please hang in there, everyone here loves you.



    OF COURSE MILL. IS OK she ia atill we go from here...queenie

  • Simon

    Wow mimilly ... I'm glad you are ok and found someone to contact. There are some very special people on this site.

  • Preston

    (((HUGS))) Mimilly and guardian angel...

  • Double Edge
    Double Edge

    {{{{{{{{ MIMILLY }}}}}}

    Just thought I would 'check in' on the site this morning and I couldn't believe the postings since I signed off last night. I'm sooooooooo glad you've weathered this latest 'storm'.

    I have no words of wisdom, because I haven't walked in your shoes....only that the older I get I see things a little differently (age = getting wisdom...hmmm..maybe). My walk tells me that LIFE truly is a emotional roller-coaster of when I was younger is being replaced with a sense that even though this journey is at times tough and down right crappy there is a wonderment in trying to figure out all the subtleties of this magnificent gift.

    I know it doesn't seem like it, but there is 'order' in this chaotic life, there is purpose and there are reasons that one day we'll all understand. But for now, look and move forward, and if you feel 'faint' in what can be preceived as the 'enormity' of this life, hold fast to those who know otherwise and in doing so those 'storms' can become nothing more than irritating drizzles.

    Take are loved and truly appreciated.

    CASSI - My heart goes out to you in the loss of your friend...I'm so sorry.

    Edited by - Double Edge on 30 August 2002 14:4:53

  • bikerchic


    I'm so glad you are here to tell us your story. I can tell you that suicide is something I struggled with until 10 years ago and I know what a brave act it was for you to reach out for help. I'm glad that deep down you felt you were worth the bother and someday I hope you will know it through and through, down to the core of your inner being.

    You are as you can see well loved!

    (((((((Mim's Angel)))))))

    (((((((Cassi & Max)))))))



    I AM SO GLAD YOU GOT SOME MUCH NEEDED SLEEP (not sex who needs it) sleep is more important in my books !! IT IS 6:30 US PST and I got up with the chickens and my diabetic blisters and edma and the all around PAIN to say to YOU I LOVE YOU AND I CARE ABOUT YOU NO MATTER WHAT !!! I know what it is to be used and abused 7 ways till sundown sooooo please promise me MILL. put yourself first--nbody else matters to you xcept you MILL. for a change..HAVE A GREAT LABORDAY weekend doing whatever YOU WANT enen if you just be a couch potato Sat / Sun / AND Monday XO XO XO ((((HUGS)))))

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