From a Ding-Dong Head

by Farkel 26 Replies latest jw experiences

  • The_Bad_Seed

    *ponders the meaning of the word dipfuck*

  • Farkel


    "Next, this writer called me "an OLD man" several times and not in the kindest of terms. Heck, I'm only 54! I wonder how old that writer is. I'm in my "middle-earlies!" "

    : Farkel, I'm heartbroken. I've always looked upon you a a "Father-figure" and to discover that you're 2 years younger than me gets me right here (points at chest).

    Geeesh! Talk about a "no win" scenario. I'm either too old or too young!


  • The Alchemist
    The Alchemist

    No Farkel you are just right.

  • searcher

    1 1. I rarely receive any negative e-mail, but I did receive a rather interesting e-mail within the last 48 hours..

    2 1. The writer proceeded to straight-away say s/he didn't "like" me. Then that person told me that a MS who was allegedly "on the fringes" was guided by him/her to this board and happened to see me use a rather colorful, but made-up metaphor, namely "DipF***." 2. The dub was horrified and scared away never to return because of that and also because of what he saw on some other debate another well-known poster was engaged with.

    3 1. Next, this writer called me "an OLD man" several times and not in the kindest of terms. 2. Heck, I'm only 54! 3. I wonder how old that writer is. 4. I'm in my "middle-earlies!"

    4 1. Thirdly, and most surprisingly, after all of that the writer wanted me to "help" him/her learn more about logic!

    5 1. I was going to respond, but I hit the "delete" instead of the "reply" button on my yahoo account. 2. So, I'll respond here:

    6 1. Writer:

    2. Your dub friend was scared off by a made-up word? Well, I'll tell you what: your friend probably hears the last part of that word he saw me write dozens of times a week unless he is in some sort of a monestary. I assert that was only a lame excuse from a lame dub who wanted any reason not to stick around. 3. There are TONS of quality posts on this board and in the archives, and your friend is feigning sensitivity because your friend is either afraid to face the facts or needs a good excuse not to. 4. That makes your friend either a coward or a hypocrite, especially considering the fact that your friend hears "bad words" every time he goes to the grocery store or laundromat.

    7 1. Next, tell your friend that he lives his entire life praying and hoping for my murder and the murder of my children, and 6 BILLION others who either swear or don't swear, but who don't buy Watchtower books. 2. So I SPIT on him for being "offended" because he read some swear words and conveniently forgets what his whole life is about: mass genocide for people who won't sell Watchtower books.

    8 1. Lastly, with regards to your wanting me to help you learn logic: read this post again, you dummy. 2. That's all the help you're going to get from me.

    9 1. (This is NOT a thread about me complaining about censorship. This is a thread about how ridiculous and unthinking people can be.)


    The inspired writer of FARKEL clearly shows us that the age 54 is a composite prophecy.

    Research shows that numbers are important in prophecy!

    In FARKEL 1:1 we can see that the inspired writer points clearly to the number 48, some researchers claim that 48 means 2 Biblical Days.

    FARKEL 3:2, clearly states the number 54 and FARKEL 7:1 definatly points to the number 6.

    So what does this indicate to honest researchers?

    obviously the inspired writer of FARKEL is telling us some wonderful news!

    The number 54(Farkel 3:2) must be combined with the number 2 (Farkel 1:1).

    Do we know how to combine these numbers? YES! The inspired writer of FARKEL indicates the way!

    In FARKEL 4:1 we see the word THIRDLY which indicates to honest researchers that 54 must be divided by 3 which gives us the number 18, when we take the number 18 and divide it by 2 (Farkel 3:2) we have the inspired number 9. Now we must subtract 6 (Farkel 7:1) at which point we arrive at the clearly indicated number 3.

    Do we know why this number is important? YES! FARKEL 7:2 clearly gives the answer! The word SPIT is shown in upper case in the oldest version of FARKEL and some researchers claim that emphasis means that the word should be reversed.

    What does this tell us?

    When the word SPIT is reversed we have the word TIPS. Websters Dictionary states:- TIP, a small present of money. So the inspired writer of FARKEL is clearly telling us to give money!

    What then, is the prophesy clearly stated in FARKEL?

    Farkel 6:3 tells us the answer! The word TONS is emphasised, also in FARKEL 9:1 emphasis is placed on the word NOT.

    Research clearly shows that if Sincere Christians do not give money to help the World Wide Work, then they will be hit by

    3 TON OF SNOT.


    Ps. Sorry Farkel, I just couldnt resist it.


  • Farkel


    If you try to canonize my drivel, I'm going to personally hunt you down and make you memorize everything Fred Hall ever wrote.

    (Except for everyone sending me all their money, and deeding me all their property, that is. That part is fine as it is.) That part is all "Bible-Based."


    Edited by - Farkel on 21 August 2002 1:58:14

  • searcher

    Oh you devil you!


  • The Alchemist
    The Alchemist

    Damn! I plan on staying out of you guy's way!

  • COMF
    *ponders the meaning of the word dipfuck*

    dipfuck (dip' fuk) n. 1. A sexual interlude in a stream, lake or other body of water.
    2. Any of the participants in a dipfuck.
    3. Any of the local citizenry hidden in the woods and observing a dipfuck.
    4. A sexual interlude in which one or more participants are chewing tobacco or dipping snuff.
    v. 1. To have sex with someone in a stream or other body of water.
    2. To have sex with someone while dipping snuff.

  • TR

    I wonder if a 'hovah would deny a "bible study" to a househoulder that said the word "dipfuck", or would the 'hovah run screaming down the street at hearing the colorful metephor.


  • Farkel


    Your comment brought back a memory for me. Remember when being call a "Jehovah" was just about the biggest insult a dub could receive? Not far back in second place was being called "A" Jehovah's Witness. For some strange reason, the society wanted everyone to know there was more than ONE of them, so we had to reply that we were "One of Jehovah's Witnesses" instead of being "A" Jehovah's Witnesses. Seemed important at the time, but now I think, "What is the freakin' difference, anyway?"

    What a bunch of crap.


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