by Jesus Christ 14 Replies latest jw friends

  • Jesus Christ
    Jesus Christ

    Back when I was a JW I had to wear pants when I was in public. I like being without pants but those pesky elders always made me wear pants. Life would have been so much better for me had I been allowed to feel the breeze from not wearing pants. There were many times when snobby elders and their wives would treat me badly for not wearing pants. Never mind the fact that I weighed 500 pounds at the time and was a really disgusting site to see. There were numerous times that complete strangers would point at me and say "Hey, that fat guy needs some pants" but they weren't JW's so who cares about their sense of decency, I didn't want to wear pants.

    Now that I've left the JW's I never wear pants anymore. I run around town with no pants on and even though I've lost a few hundred pounds quite a few people still don't like looking at my hairy bum (did I mention I don't always wipe after making a deposit in the porcelain bank?). It doesn't matter though because I was so traumatized by the elders forcing me to wear pants that I'll never wear them again. How dare anyone try to make me wear pants when I went through such a traumatic experience with the elders making me wear pants!!!!! I couldn't care less about the fact that not wearing pants creates quite an uncomfortable atmosphere for the people that I visit in their own homes. I have the right to do whatever I please even if it means making a complete fool of myself and offending people with my naked bum.

    I also find the idea that when I am a guest in someone else's home and they try to tell me to wear pants to be highly offensive! They can't tell me to wear pants in their house. I'm also highly offended when they or someone else who visits them tries to put a newspaper under my unwiped bum when I try to sit on their nice furniture that they've spent quite a bit of time and money to make. What gives them or their designated agents the right to stop me from smearing poo all over their wonderful furniture that's more comfortable and beautiful than any other furniture. Sure, there is other furniture out there but I like their furniture the best so I should be able to sit on it without my pants on and smear whatever I like because hey, this is a free country dag nabbit!

    You think this whole bit sounds stupid and pointless? Have you read some of the other threads that have been posted lately? Care to explain how mine is any different?

  • SixofNine

    Jesus, Buddha. Buddha, Jesus. You two have some things in common, you know?

  • Simon

    he he he ... I'm starting to believe in Jesus Christ again

    BTW: forgot to tell you that the "dad bless you" line was great.

    Edited by - Simon on 18 August 2002 12:58:47

  • larc

    JC, yes sir, freedom is the thing. It is hip and sophisticated to excersise total freedom. Some old fuddy duddies just don't understand that. I look down my nose at those with such antiquated ideas. Who do they think they are?

  • onacruse

    It's people like you that made me decide to buy nothing but brown furniture! LOL

  • Satanus

    So jesus had a wieght problem and got over it. I would like to know though, how you learned that walking on water thing. Was it from listening to tony robbins' tapes?

    I understand your pants objection. In the bible you never wore pants either.


  • teejay

    "Jesus Christ",

    Who *are* you, REEEAAALLY???

  • minimus

    you know, everybody KNOWS you're not Jesus Christ. According to the Bible, Jesus Christ never wore pants.

  • SYN

    Teejay: Some would have us believe Jesus is actually God!

  • sf

    (Duplicate deleted)

    Edited by - sf on 18 August 2002 17:53:11

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