Family members of molested

RubyTuesday

Who here has had a family member molested by a JW?

My neice was molested by her JW step father.The elders went to court in his behalf.The congergation banned together and sent an avalanche of letters to the court, stateing that he was a good clean christian.The judge believed them over my 11 year old neice.He was sent back to live with her.

This was at an english speaking congergation in Salinas California.If anyone knows an elder named Deitrick(not sure of the spelling)Beware!!!He will protect and cover for pedophiles. The name of the molester is Jehue Hernandez and his JW Wifes name is Cynthia aka Cindi Kay Magellan aka Hernandez aka Torres.Yes she is the mother of the victim,she knew what was going on and helped protect her sick husband.With a mother like that you don't need enimies.

amac

My wife has a family member that was molested. She is currently involved in the criminal trial and recently had to testify at the pre-trial. There have been a small handful of JWs at the court proceedings. A couple of them have been kind enough to talk to the family of the victim (who was raised around JWs but is not a JW or member of the cong) and explain that they were not there to take sides, but only there at the request of the wife of the accused for emotional support. I think their support can be shown elsewhere without attending the court proceedings, but I appreciate that they explained this, nevertheless. The others I find very irritating, but to give them the benefit of the doubt, I have to tell myself that they probably feel the same way and are not there to actually take sides.

The situation you described with the cong giving their support to the accused is infuriating. However, it makes me think...what if one of my best friends was accused and he asked me to be a character witness and say that he was a decent guy? I'm not sure what I would do.

Makena1

((((((Ruby))))))))) Very sorry to hear about your neice. What is happening in that congregation sounds very similar to the Othello Washington case.

Off topic:

You wrote: This was at an english speaking congergation in Salinas California

A friend of mine from long ago, Rodney Hatfield I heard was in Salinas. Do you know if he is still there?

All best,

Mak

Lin

I was too, by two of my brothers when I was very young. Prior to that, I was almost raped by a "family friend". I wasn't believed, but was accused by my father of making it all up, and tearing my shirt myself while playing outside. Argh!!! I never told anyone about my brothers, and I mean no one....until I posted my story on Silentlambs on June 7th of this year. I got into alot of trouble the first time I told, I was too afraid to tell after that. Plus, not being believed really did a number on me emotionally, and I just kept it all buried inside.

Edited by - Lin on 15 August 2002 14:53:39

Swan

In therapy I told my psychiatrist about an incident in my early childhood that I never forgot. He helped me to understand that this was borderline child abuse and very inappropriate. We had to address this a lot in therapy because the activity was masked in play and I liked it a lot, for which I had always felt guilty. It also received the tacit approval of the other adults in my immediate family. There were some mixed messages about it too. The relative involved apologized to me just before shunning me. I have always felt close to this relative and still really love this person.

My brother's wife and her sisters were also molested by a close relative.

BeelzeDub

My sister was molested at age 14 by a brother in our congregation. She is still an active JW and I did not know this about her until the Dateline program aired and we talked about it.

My parents were told not to say anything to anyone else about it. They were told not to report it to the police.

The same brother who molested my sister did so to other young girls in the congregation over many years. He has been disfellowshiped multiple times yet I never knew exactly why.

Several families moved away from the congregation after he did this to their daughters.

Last I knew he was serving as a MS in the same congregation when this happened 30 years ago.

BD

Lady Lee

1 aunt (baptized) sexually abused by her father and her 3 brothers (V, F, & R) (all baptized JWs) and her brother-in-law (FM)

1 brother (L) abused by an uncle (R from the above)

1 sister (R) abused by her father (FM above) who was not baptized but was going to meetings for 4 years and door to door. R was also abused by 2 of her brothers (L & J)

Me - not baptized - abused by 3 uncles (V, F, & R above) and step-father (FM above)

R and FM were both reported to the elders. Elders recommended sending girls to live elsewhere and kept the abusers in the cong. Not reported to the police, medical of family services

FM had a history of abusing young girls and after leaving my mother went on to become a foster parent - of girls

Mulan

One of my sons, when he was a boy (he is 36 now). The man who molested him got to EVERY boy in the congregation. Of those boys, NONE are JW's now, one molested a child, one was disfellowshipped for having sex with his wife's sister who was 14, and one is dead...........suicide. Only one is happily married (my son)...........the others, who married, are all divorced. The perpetrator was 15 at the time, and the elders didn't know what to do, so they did nothing. I didn't know until my son was an adult. None of the other mothers were told either. What a system.

Pistoff

If you all haven't, please get these stories to silentlambs.org

my neice is the most recent high profile case.......you can guess which.

I am the only extended family member to have called her with support; my brother thinks she should have "gone to the brothers again and explained that there was a mistake made, respectfully". Please.
He is in such deep denial, i have sent him a few AP newsitems to try to get through. He is a true believer though; still thinks that society does not need to apologize for '75.

The others just IGNORE IT; they don't know what to say or do, so they do nothing, not even try to determine the truth. I am heartsick about it, i thought it would spark interest or outrage in them, but they see that it will lead to rethinking the org, and they just won't go there.(my wife's words)

Dia

I am aghast at these stories.

The 'pattern' is mind-boggling.

A book that you might find helpful, "Sibling Abuse Trauma; Assessment and Intervention Strategies for Children, Families and Adults" by Caffaro.

Family members of molested

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