I sold my soul for lobster

by joannadandy 22 Replies latest jw experiences

  • not interested
    not interested

    Jo,

    sounds like a good deal to me, al i got for selling my soul was a beer, but it was a badly needed beer

    N.I.

  • nativenyr23
    nativenyr23

    HEY. You could always go and have a fun game of BULLSHIT BINGO!!!!! and then afterwards, enjoy your lobster!

  • Scully
    Scully

    Joanna:

    If you go to the meeting, I recommend sitting in the front row. During the Public Talk, approximately every 5 minutes, do your best Sharon Stone thang for the benefit of the speaker.

    During the Watchtower Study, decorate the margins of your magazine with pictures of steaming buttered lobsters.

    Love, Scully

  • Shutterbug
    Shutterbug

    Joanna,

    Since logging on to this forum I've learned to love you dearly, but this time you have opened your mouth and stuck both feet in it !!!

  • joannadandy
    joannadandy

    Scully, my magazines and books always had the best illustrations, damn I think I need to scan some and post them. Jesus had some very interesting thought balloons in the Greatest Man book. Oh yeah, my goal in the Revelation book (I think it was the thrid time through) was to put a smiley face in every perfect circle. (there were lots) Sometimes they weren't all circles but I was desperate for a and put one anyway.

    Shutter, could you maybe tell me what offended you so much about my post?

  • Double Edge
    Double Edge

    Having never been a JW I know my opinion on this is very minor, however I have sat through some boring church meetings (yeah, I know, like that's the same).

    If I were you, and you like'd lobster that much, go ahead and go...do a little spying (and intimidating) to make it interesting. The very second the last "Amen" is sounded, lean over to your parents and say..."Ok, I kept my part of the deal, now how about that lobster?" You can then use the car ride over to the restaurant to bring up some interesting questions about JW's to stir their minds.

    (Just a thought)

  • Double Edge
    Double Edge

    Shutterbug....

    since when is "honesty" inappropriate? I see nothing she's written that's offensive....give her a break, she just came here for advice, not to be put down.

  • Englishman
    Englishman

    Actually, I would do anything for lobster too.

    Well, maybe not fellatio.

    Englishman.

  • joannadandy
    joannadandy

    lol...Englishman, it's really not so bad, you might like it if you tried it...HAHAHAHA!

    Anyway--thought it was time for an:

    UPDATE...

    So last night my boytoy calls me. He wants to get together on Saturday night. I again joking around said "Gee I dunno, I have to go to church" to which he said "WHAT?" And I said "I sold my soul for lobster, I don't see how I can get out of it". (A bit of background on him--he hates religion. All of it! Since knowing me, and learning about the whacky dub faith, they are his new hated target, he told me the other day he thinks he hates them more than he hates Catholics.)

    His solution was thus: I come party with him saturday night. I bring the wine, and he is going to grill steak and do some stuffed lobster tails. Yeah did I mention this boy really knows how to cook? There is more in his bargain too. After dinner, we shall sit on his deck, watch the sunset over the river, and he'll even let me smoke one of his "good" cigars. Oh yea, and I might *ahem* get laid.

    Frankly the Kingdom Hall offer can't compete.

    So unless I go hang out with him, and then drag my ass home in the wee morning hours so I can go to the meeting and stink of booze, sex, and cigars...ahh who I am kidding...problem solved.

    GOD BLESS THOSE WORDLY BOYS!

    Edited by - joannadandy cuz I speel bad like and grammartac bad

    Edited by - joannadandy on 2 August 2002 16:47:14

  • Reborn2002
    Reborn2002

    LOL good for you joanna!

    ANYTHING beats wasting hours of your life in a Kingdumb Hall.

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