How to get reinstated

by snowboardingguy 18 Replies latest jw friends

  • Mary

    Rule No. 1: LIE...........tell them you're horrified at your behaviour, and that even though Jehovah may forgive you, you find it hard to forgive yourself. This will impress the elders as they are looking for weak minded people with low self-esteem that they can control and dominate. And nothing makes an elder feel better than pointing out flaws in others - it makes them feel that all the child molesting they've been doing, isn't really that bad compared to whatever you did..................

    Tell them that you miss going out in service (only an elder would actually believe this) and the association of the brotherhood. This will give them the impression that being cut off from your family and friends is a deterent from you ever sinning again and therefore, they won't see you as a threat.

    Depending on what type of people these elders are (are they young, new elders, or old fashioned elders?), you might let your eyes well up with tears, but try not to "cry" too much.......just enough to make them think that you're really changed...........if they're older elders with old-fashioned ideas, try to convince them that not only have you changed, you've gone a step further in "pummelling your body". For example, if you got DF'd for committing fornication, you tell them that not only have you stopped fornicating, but you've also trained your mind so that you don't even "look at a woman with passion in your heart".

    They'll most likely fall for all this, if you can do it with a straight face. Let us know how it goes.

  • aluminutty

    That whole desception and double life thing is just... yucky and disingenuus. I am thankful I have never been forced to walk that road. I only wish that
    others were so lucky.

    Edited for clarification.

    Edited by - aluminutty on 12 July 2002 11:3:59

  • bad_associashun

    From the elders' handbook:


    While there should be no hasty action in reinstating
    disfellowshipped individuals, consideration should be
    given to a plea for reinstatement when this is requested.
    Once a year the body of elders reviews a list of those in
    the congregation territory who are disfellowshipped or

    128 - "Pay Attention to Yourselves and to All the Flock"

    disassociated. They will call on each one they select in
    order to see if he wants to return. (w91 4/15 pp. 22-3)
    The body will assign two elders to make each call,
    preferably elders familiar with the case.
    During a brief visit or two, the elders can kindly explain
    what the individual can do to return.
    They will report the results to the Congregation Service
    Committee, and the body will be informed at the next
    meeting of the elders.
    If someone asks about reinstatement or if by changing his
    course gives evidence of repentance and a desire to be
    reinstated, the authorized elders may speak with the
    individual and kindly explain what he needs to do in order
    to he reinstated.
    There is an advantage to having the elders who served on
    the judicial committee that disfellowshipped the
    individual also serve on the committee for the
    reinstatement if this is possible and they are still serving
    as elders in the congregation handling the request for
    In hearing pleas for reinstatement, elders need to be
    Genuine repentance and a turning away from the wrong
    course--not the attitude of others or merely the time
    elapsed--are the chief determining factors in deciding
    when a person may be reinstated. (1 Cor. 5:1, 11-13; 2
    Cor. 2:6, 7)
    Elders should be sure that sufficient time has passed for
    the disfellowshipped person to prove that his profession
    of repentance is genuine. ( it-2 p. 771 )
    Consider the overall pattern of his life. Does it now show
    that he is repentant? (w77 3/1 p. 152)
    If so, elders will guard against going to extremes by
    exacting a point-by-point admission of sins that may not
    have been clearly proved.

    UNIT 5 (c)

    - 129
    Where there is evidence of conspiracy between
    individuals to put away their mates and marry each other,
    considerable time should elapse before a hearing for
    reinstatement may be held. (w79 11/15 pp. 31-2)
    If it is determined that the wrongdoer is sincerely
    repentant, has discontinued his former wrong conduct,
    and is doing works that befit repentance, he can be
    reinstated. (Compare Acts 26:20.)
    The decision to reinstate is made by a judicial committee
    of the congregation that took the disfellowshipping action.
    The secretary should sign and return the S-79b card to the
    Society immediately. (om pp. 149-50)
    If the disfellowshipped person has moved, his request for
    reinstatement may be heard by a local judicial committee
    where he is now attending meetings. Thereafter, that
    committee will give the body of elders of the congregation
    that disfellowshipped the individual its recommendation.
    If the two congregations are reasonably close to each
    other, the judicial committee of the congregation that took
    the disfellowshipping action should meet with the
    disfellowshipped individual after receiving the
    recommendation of the committee of the congregation
    where he made his plea for reinstatement.

    Reinstatement is announced in the congregation where the
    person was disfellowshipped as well as in the
    congregation where he now attends.

    When an individual is reinstated, he will still need much
    spiritual assistance.
    The elders should see that definite arrangements are made
    to help the person regain spiritual health and strength.
    (Col. 2:7; Titus 2:1, 2)
    They may arrange for a Bible study to be conducted,
    which would be reported as field service.

    130 - "Pay Attention to Yourselves and to All the Flock "

    Restrictions should be imposed to help the person see the
    need of continuing to make 'straight paths for his feet' and
    also out of consideration for the congregation's
    conscience. (Heb. 12:13)
    The privilege of sharing in the field service is restored
    when the individual is reinstated.
    other privileges, such as commenting at meetings,
    handling parts on the program, and offering prayer at
    meetings, can be restored progressively when it is
    determined that the individual has progressed spiritually
    to the point that he is qualified and when it is judged by
    the elders that the extending of such privileges will not be
    offensive to the congregation.
    It will be up to the elders of the congregation where he
    now is located to decide when certain privileges may be
    Circumstances of each case govern the length of time that
    should elapse before recommending a reinstated brother
    for additional privileges and responsibility.
    Carefully consider possible effects if the individual were
    to be appointed. Would it be a cause for stumbling among
    the brothers?
    The privilege of serving as ministerial servant or elder can
    be recommended only after he has had ample time to
    prove himself to be irreprehensible and is again "free from
    accusation" and has "freeness of speech." ( 1 Tim. 3:2, 9,
    10, 13)
    He must live down the reproach and build up a convincing
    record of righteousness, which may take a number of
    If wrongdoing occurred in another congregation, the
    feelings of members of that congregation should be
    In cases of scandal, he might not be able to live down
    his wrongdoing sufficiently to qualify for an appoint-
    ment to serve as a ministerial servant or an elder for a
    very long time.
    UNIT 5 (c)
    - 131

    Hope this helps some- remember even after ri, you will STILL be a 'marked individual- not fit for associashun- you will still be shunned by many until they see what you are going to do (see above part on 'restoring priveleges'.

  • Dawn

    Hi Snowboard:

    The people here on the board have pretty much hit the mark on what it takes to get reinstated.

    If reinstatement is what YOU want then I really hope it works out for you - each person must make a decision as to what path to lead and it's not up to anyone else to judge them.

    Rom 14:4 Who are you to pass judgment on the servant of another? It is before his own master that he stands or falls. And he will be upheld, for the Master is able to make him stand.

    If you are returning because you miss family and friends - my heart really goes out to you. There are many on this board in your same position - that are living the life of a JW without really believing it. It is a tough position to be in. I rode that fence for a long time because I did not want to loose my family and friends. When I was finally DF'd and walked away I thought it would be the worse thing in my life - I was so wrong.

    There are two sayings of Jesus that I never understood as a Jehovah's Witness - I knew what I was "suppose" to understand from those scriptures - but they didn't REALLY make sense to me:

    Joh 8:32 and you will know the truth, and the truth will make you free."

    Mat 11:28-30 Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me; for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light."

    Snowboard - do those scriptures have REAL meaning to you? If not, then something is definately wrong. I started studying the bible again a couple of years ago - I read the book of John (all by itself - no other material) - in that I found the REAL Gospel of Jesus. Before long I realized what those two scriptures REALLY meant - his Yoke is easy, his burden is light, and HIS truth WILL set you FREE. My advice is that you at least read the book of John completely - by itself - before you make any further decisions.


    If you want back in you`ll have to tell them what they want to hear.Remember to grovel,then pucker up and give them each a BIG SMOOOOOOOOOTCH ON THE ASS!! ..LOL...OUTLAW

  • SYN

    I can't believe we're telling someone how to get re-instated!!! Never did I think this day would come!

    SnowboarderDude, I sincerely hope you're doing this to have access to family/friends!

  • Lee Elder
    Lee Elder

    The difference between being a brown noser and having your head up the elders
    arse is just matter of depth perception. How bad do you want it ;-)


  • thewiz

    the converse of this:

    i knew a guy that studied, brillantly for @3 months, got baptized then got himself DF'ed @month after that, just so the Jdubs would leave him alone.

  • snowboardingguy

    thanks so much. i might as well ask about what the letter needs to be like to.

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