Do Your Emotions Come Back When You Leave a Cult?

by D wiltshire 17 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  Sunspot

  Well........

  I must have been a REAL "odd duck" as a JW!!! I've ALWAYS been emotional, sensitive, whatever.

  I remember when a sister was telling me about something that had happened to her daughter (she'd gotten severely burned) and as she was relating the story, my eyes had welled up. She just looked at me in awe and said she couldn't believe how what had happened to her daughter could affect me so much!

  In one congregation I had belonged to, our bookstudy conductor's darling 7 year old son had gotten attacked by a dog at a get-together (I hadn't been invited to) and our car group had stopped by to visit. When I walked in and saw his little face and all the swelling and stitches, I had to bolt for the kitchen so I wouldn't lose it in front of him. For YEARS after that, his Mom would comment on how astonished (but touched) she was at my reaction.

  I had been working out in service with a newly re-instated brother and in chatting with him I had discovered he was the son of a dear older sister (annointed) that I had known from another congregation. I loved her! She was very sweet and very humble. I asked how she was doing since she had moved to Florida a few years before. He looked at me wide-eyed and said she had died recently...and I just said "Oh no!".......and got all teary-eyed to the point where I couldn't pull myself together enough to go to the doors any more that day.

  Five or six more incidents come to mind, but I won't put'em all down here.......I guess you get the idea. For some unknown reason, I never adopted that cold and callous attitude I was supposed to have as a JW! (except when it came to shunning DFed ones)

  Quack-quack!

  Hugs,

  Annie....the Odd Duck!
• 

  Introspection

  Recovering your old personality will come I think, as you correct all the shit the WT put in your head. It seems to me everyday I find myself changing, almost like I'm makeing up for lost time.

  And you're an excellent example of that. If your current rate of "progress" is any indication, you'll have all that time made up in no time. I don't know any other ex-JW who has changed as much as you have including those online, and considering the fact that you haven't been out all that long I think you'd have to agree that you've changed A LOT! I'm sure there are others out there who have as well, but they probably don't talk about it so much. Well, I hope they do talk about it a bit more and others listen to them.
• 

  D wiltshire

  I want to thank everyone for your comments different pionts of veiw are benificial and reflect what we really happen to them after leaving the Borg in our beleifs.

  I'm sure some new ones that are just finding out that WT uses mind control will get some encouragement from your experiences.

  Introspection, some of my realizations about my emotions have come to me clearer thru meditation useing brain wave CDs.
• 

  zev

  yes,

  they do.

  and if your not careful, it catches you by surprise.

  i've cried more in 7 months than i did in 20 years. for different reasons, though mostly the tears now are happy ones, full of emotions, and its the way it comes out sometimes.

  sometimes i cry for other reasons, but the point is, i CAN FEEL, and respond to the feelings of emotions again.

  i call it living life.

  what i was doing before was playing follow the leader.

  the leader was a fool.
• 

  bigfloppydog

  I agree with Marilyn, at first when I left my emotions where sooo very raw. Sometimes thinking of the ones you left, those you know truly did love you, then for the lose of relatives you no longer have a relationship with, because you get shunned, that was the hard part, especially if they are siblings you grew up with, who now have families of their own, who also are not allowed to speak to you. I really try not to think to much about this, and as time has gone by, you put up a protection wall so as not to get hurt. So now it only hurts some of the time.
• 

  Satanus

  Dwilt

  Hemisync from monroe inst? If so which ones worked best? I have listened to a few of them - transcendence, far journey, friends...

  SS
• 

  Solace

  I remember hearing the cruel tales of how everyone except J.W.s were going to be killed and tortured in Armageddon. I always had that gut feeling of something being wrong. I think I felt similar emotions that I do now, only now they make sense to me. Back then I just thought I was crazy for not wanting to accept it.
• 

  D wiltshire

  Heaven,

  I guess we were all effect a little different I feel that I was emotionally constipated for about 29 yrs and just now have been getting in touch with my feelings.

  SS,

  I use a couple different ones but my favorite onw at the moment is "Deep Meditation" by Brian sync

  Here's the web site http://www.brainsync.com/