Caleb asks his Dad a question.

by LogCon 30 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

• 

  LogCon

  Caleb: Dad, can I ask you a question?

  Dad: Of course, my son. Haven’t I told you that you can come to me whenever you have a question?

  Caleb: Yes Dad, thanks.

  Dad: It is so good to see you eager to learn. What is your question, my son?

  Caleb: Well, you know how the early Christians faced persecution from the Gentile world because of their preaching work?

  Dad: Yes, my son.

  Caleb: And you know how Paul told Timothy that ‘… all who desire to live a godly life in Christ Jesus will be persecuted…’?

  Dad: Yes, yes, my son.

  Caleb: And you know how Jesus said that ‘…'A servant is not greater than his master.' If they persecuted me, they will persecute you also…’?

  Dad: Yes, yes, yes my son. My how much you have learned at our weekly family study night!

  Caleb: Well, if what Paul and Jesus said is true, then…

  Dad: Oh my, Caleb, what do you mean, ‘… if what they say is true…’. Of course it is true.

  Caleb: Then why have none of the Governing Body ever been persecuted or thrown into prison for preaching the good news of the kingdom.

  Dad: Are you trying to make trouble?

  Caleb: No Dad.

  Dad: Then get outside and play with your toy airplane, and stop asking so many stupid questions.
• 

  sparrowdown

  Poor Caleb, he doesn't know that Anthony Morris wouldn't be seen dead in an orange jumpsuit.

  They were probably designed by gay people.
• 

  Captain Obvious

  Hmm. Sounds a lot like my childhood. Ask questions, sure. But only if they are easily answered by looking in the index. Otherwise, they will be met with a berating and dismissed.

  Of course, they would deny this if asked today.
• 

  SanLuisObispoTruthSeeker

  I doubt they fly Coach, why would Jesus Christ want his Barrons with common rabbel?
• 

  smiddy

  Dad: Caleb we gave you an I-pad so you could look up JW.ORG , you havent been looking up apostate sites have you ?

  Caleb: No dad I was just asking a simple question

  Dad:Trust in jehovah he will answer all your questions in due time. Just pray and do all that the G.B.direct you to do .

  smiddy
• 

  phats

  Yes Smiddy, &

  Dad: Caleb, I'm worried about some words you have been using far to often these days.

  Caleb: what are those Dad?

  Dad: words like If & Why. these are words that must only be used when in the context of agreeing with the LO (loving Organization) & what's this with you saying ‘… if what they say is true…’ Your on a sticky wicket with that type of apostate talk.

  Caleb: Sorry Dad.

  Dad: Well get your act together son or I'm not (& I'm going to make sure your mother & any of your loving loyal family members.) going to be talking to you for the rest of our lives if you don't, & remember this. It will all be your fault.

  Caleb: Okay Dad.

  Dad: Love you son.

  Caleb: Er....... Love you to Dad.
• 

  SuperBoy

  Caleb: Dad I have a question.
  
  Dad: Wonderful, you know that you should always ask questions* like the Boreans did.
  
  Caleb: Thanks, but what's the asterisk for?
  
  Dad: Never mind, you'll find out when you older and more indoctrin... learned.
  
  Caleb: So, my question. You know the way we are told that the world is a bad place?
  
  Dad <forlornly>: It is son, that's right.
  
  Caleb: And we are only safe in Jehovah's organisation.
  
  Dad: Yes, absolutely, I'm so pleased that you been listening at the meetings. You might win the baptism competition.
  
  Caleb: The what?
  
  Dad: Oh, it's a fun thing - see whose son gets baptised first. It's shows that you've had a better upbringing.
  
  Caleb: Oh wow I hope I win.
  
  Dad: I hope you do too because it will show that we are the most spiritual family in the congregation.
  
  Caleb: You're very competitive dad, I thought that wasn't allowed?
  
  Dad: Only when it's about sports or careers, how can we not be competitive to show how much we love the organisation?
  
  Caleb: Jehovah.
  
  Dad: Yes, the organisation.
  
  Caleb: We're getting off topic a bit and I'm not sure the author knows what age I am supposed to be. I go from childish to mature in one line! Can we get back to my question? Please?
  
  Dad: Yes of course. So, the world is a bad place and you are safe in the organisation.
  
  Caleb: And the Bible says that Satan was roaming the earth...
  
  Dad: Yes, that's how he found the faithful man Job and persecuted him.
  
  Caleb: Curse God and Die! Haha. His wife was bad.
  
  Dad: Yes turned out to be a a right skank bitch whore.
  
  Caleb: A what?
  
  Dad: Oh nothing. So your question.
  
  Caleb: So Satan is roaming the earth, and in 1914 he was banned from heaven and is confined to earth.
  
  Dad: Yes, and the outbreak of World War I proves that along with anecodatal evidence that 1913 was the most peaceful year ever. Facts. Always use real facts when you are discussing things with interested people.
  
  Caleb: That man on the doors told us a fact about the organisation...
  
  Dad: AND I TOLD YOU NEVER NEVER NEVER TALK ABOUT IT. HE WAS AN APOSTATE AND MENTALLY ILL.
  
  Caleb: Oh yeah. So it wasn't a fact?
  
  Dad: Absolutely not. The only facts that are worth knowing about the organisation are the ones from the organisation. I mean, if you wanted to know how the Tesco works, you would go straight to Tesco wouldn't you?
  
  Caleb: What's Tesco?
  
  Dad: It's the biggest supermarket chain the UK and a massive worldwide company. To be honest, I'm not sure who hosts JW.NET so I picked a big company seeing as this conversation assumes we are in the UK.
  
  Caleb: Amazon would probably have been a better example. Or Apple. Or Microsoft. Or Starbucks.
  
  Dad: You're right there champ! So anyway, if you want information about how those companies work, you would go to their website, carefully typing in the name, avoiding spelling mistakes. You wouldn't go anywhere else. Why would you?
  
  Caleb: And that way you'd get all the information the company wants you to see!
  
  Dad: Exactly. So, back to your question?
  
  Caleb: So, the world is an evil place. Satan is confined to the earth. And he makes bad things happen. And he makes people do bad things.
  
  Dad: He does Caleb. He's always up to mischief. That's why we need the protection of the organisation.
  
  Caleb: So we need Jehovah to look after us.
  
  Dad: The organisation, yes.
  
  Caleb: But Dad...
  
  Dad: Yes?
  
  Caleb: The world is maybe a bad place because Jehovah put Satan here?What would man be like without Satan's influence? There's lots of good in the world, maybe there would be more. So everyone on the planet is judged to be bad, but with the malignant influence of Satan all this time. What could mankind do if they were free of that? We might not even need Jehovah then!
  
  Dad: That's a very good question Caleb. I think we need to get the elders over for a chat with you.
• 

  SuperBoy

  -
• 

  stuckinarut2

  Caleb: Dad, why are you an overbearing tyrannical domineering father who treats mum and my sis as being of little value, while you boost your ego all the time and seem to show me favour as a male?

  Dad: because I am training you to be a congregation elder...or maybe one day, even a governing body member!
• 

  phats

  That was a good one SuperBoy,

  Dad: Look Caleb. The way you are reasoning is getting me worried.

  Caleb: Why's that Dad?

  Dad: It's bending all the lies I've hid behind for so long & it hurts my brian to think in any way that may bring the LO (Loving Organization) into some kind of scrutiny.

  Caleb: What's scrutiny Dad?

  Dad: It's something that only the LO can do to us. We must never do it to them or the LO ("Dam... I keep forgetting...) I mean Jehovah as it makes him sad & when you make him sad he will cause you much pain son..... so much pain.

  Caleb: But doesn't Jehovah love me Dad?

  Dad: Yes you know he dose...& your using that apostate tone again son..careful now.

  Caleb: Sorry again Dad but.

  Dad:... Caleb....

  Caleb: Okay. Okay. If Jehovah loves me then why would he want to cause any of us any pain when he must know how bad pain feels because he created us with all the feelings that we have.

  Dad: Right that's it... We're off to brother Hard Nose & he can explain these deeper things to you.

  Caleb: But I don't understand Dad.

  Dad: If you don't get baptized pretty soon son I've got no chance of getting appointed because your lack of submission to the LO will reflect badly on my teaching skills & will bring up questions in the next CO elders meeting as to wether I'm fully indoctrinated ....Duh... I mean spiritual. There, you've got me doing it now. That's it..... you must be doing something with satan as he seems to have you in his grip. This is worse than I thought. Right we're of to get you straightened out son.

  Caleb: So is that straightening me out to see things as truthful or bending me into believing all the lies Dad?

  Dad: OMG... The boys on the verge of full on Satanism. I just hope we've got him in time. I'm never going to get my appointment at this rate. Dam you Caleb.

  Caleb: Sorry dad.

  Phats.