Getting kicked out.

by bobert 23 Replies latest jw friends

  • bobert
    bobert

    Sometime this week. My parents are getting a lot of heat from the congregation, and tension in my house was already super high. I know it's inevitable. I really don't know what to do. In Canada, if I get kicked out, they're legally obliged to finacially support me. I also have a part time job, but not enough money to make a month's rent in a small room ($300-400). I really don't know what to do right now. Any of you guys been in this kind of situation?

  • KateWild
    KateWild

    I am really sorry to hear this bobert. How old are you?

    I think it's an absolute disgrace the elders are influencing your parents to kick you out the house. This is especially bad since you don't earn enough for a month's rent. What ever happened to being the good Samaritan? You need to appeal to your parents good nature. Try and stop this from happening.

    I am so sorry this is happening to you, this is not the way families are supposed to be.

    Kate xx

  • rebel8
    rebel8

    How old are you?

    Do you know of any relatives or friends you could rent a room from?

    Can you get more hours at your job, or get a 2nd job?

    You mentioned your parents are legally obliged to support you. Will that be an instant thing or would you potentially have to go through the legal system to enforce that? I'm just thinking perhaps you need to make both short- and long-term plans. Can you get a credit card account to help you through the short term, if you need to?

    This happened to me too, btw.

  • berrygerry
    berrygerry

    Step 1. Don't panic.

    Try to relax.

    Lay down and think.

    Sounds like you're under 18.

  • ruderedhead
    ruderedhead

    Can you speak with your parents about coming to some kind of agreement that will allow you to stay for,say, another 4 months to allow you to be better prepared to move? That would give you some time to save some money. May I ask your age? I am assuming that you are a minor if they are legally responsible for you still. Pointing out that for now it would be more affordable for them to allow you to stay, and just be cordial to each other might be a good idea.

    You mentioned in an earlier post that you were planning on moving out. Was that because your parents were talking about you leaving due to pressure from the congregation? It sounds like they have a buttinski type of congregation. There are those that allow families to deal with their own issues. Do they have the backbone to tell them to back off, that they are dealing with the situation and praying about it? I wish you all the best.

  • Wild_Thing
    Wild_Thing

    I was start socking away every dollar you can and ride it out as long as you can. Then, if/when it does happen, you will have a bit of cash to work with. You might start looking around for a roommates to live with. It can cut your living expenses significantly.

  • clarity
    clarity

    Bobert ...sorry sweety, don't panic.

    Be really 'nice' to your parents, stay under the radar.

    Whatever they decide, try to negotiate. You give up

    something to stay home longer, or try to stall for more

    time.

    Watchtower has programmed parents to throw their own

    flesh & blood away......& then call that a loving thing! UGH!

  • DesirousOfChange
    DesirousOfChange

    Assuming that your parents are being pressured to do something that they really do not want to do, suggest that they ask the Elders how they can throw you out of their home (esp if you are a minor) and be obeying 1 Tim 5:8: "Anyone who does not provide for their relatives, and especially for their own household, has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever."

    Perhaps they will choose to obey the Bible rather than the Elders. They should suggest that the Elders contact the WT Service Department and ask if they really agree with the suggestion of the Elders to throw their child out into the street. Tell them they would like to SEE IN WRITING the letter from the Branch Office.

    Doc

  • LisaRose
    LisaRose

    Check out homeless shelters, even if you don't yet need it, it would be good to have a back up plan, they might have counselors who can help advise you. Many cities have programs for homeless youths. You could also look for a room rental situation, sometimes people rent out a room in their home, it would be cheaper than an apartment on your own. Check out Craig's list. Do you have friends who have understanding parents who might help out? Do you have non JW relatives?

    After you get information about possibilities, and decide what is best for you, be proactive and have a talk with your parents. Present them with your options and ask their help in getting new living quarters. They may open to helping you move on, as it gets them out of the pressure to kick you out. Make sure you ask for financial help to transition.

    You could say "Mom and dad, I know that my being here is creating pressure for you. I love you and I appreciate all you have done for me, so I do wish I could do what you want, but I just can't join something I don't believe in. I think the best thing for me is to move out, but I am not ready yet to live on my own. I have looked into my options, this is what I think would be best"

  • kneehighmiah
    kneehighmiah

    Are you an adult? If you're a minor you should seek legal advice. If you're not causing problems I'm sure they cannot kick you out just because you don't want to follow their religion. Remember you have freedom to choose your religion. It's a basic human right.

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