Thanks for starting this thread! I was never a JW, but can really relate to your comments, as I have seen my parents and sister's personalities change dramatically.
My dad is a salesman by trade. He loves to talk to people. About 2 years ago, he sent out an email to all 6 of his adult children, stating that "My first priority in life now, is to BE A GOOD JEHOVAH'S WITNESS. I hope you have noticed positive changes in me."
Changes I've noticed: 1. You never answer emails or phone calls. 2. You no longer acknowledge or participate in family gatherings. 3. You act like you are made out of stone, when you do show up. 4. You repeat platitudes about yourself and your beliefs, when talking to me and other family members... most notably, "They are smarter than me!" 5. You are embarrassed to be bold about your religion, which really sends the message that you are more concerned about avoiding your own family, so you can go out and knock on the doors to try to "save" strangers.
My mom used to be much funnier, and loved to have fun. She strains to tell a joke now, and since she doesn't have any good material now, her jokes fall flat most of the time, and her frustration is very evident (at least to me). She is ashamed that some of her coworkers do not know she is a JW, and made the statement last week, "Everyone should know you are a JW." My mom, for as long as I can remember growing up, always had 1 or 2 girlfriends or best friends that she would talk to and have fun with. She used to go on little weekend trips, or have weekly chin-wags to let off steam. There was some pretty heavy mischief going on at times, but she always valued her friendships. On her recent visit, I asked her who she "hangs out" with now. She doesn't have anyone now! How sad... all those people at the Kingdom Hall, who love you so much? I thought the people in Jehovah's Org were the happiest people on earth...
My sister has never had a backbone, and pretty much went from leaving home at 18, to getting married at 20 (pregnant). Her husband has always controlled her, so I'm not sure she has had the chance to really develop her own natural personality. She was baptized into the JW's about 4 years ago, and she has become completely detached from family, and really just seems unhappy. She brings a dark cloud with her, even when she is trying to put on her fake smile for us. It is very sad. If she ever were to leave the organization, she would have some real difficulty adjusting.
My elderette told me a story on our first bible study appointment. Her daughter works for a minor city in Michigan. It started out as her giving me an update on her children, but she actually made the statement that her daughter had to have her "work personality" and her "Kingdom Hall personality." I found that interesting, but didn't acknowlege it at the time. There are times when everyone has to adapt to their situation.
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The fact that the JW's are being warned to put absolutely everything in their life in 2nd place, in order to work for the fulfillment of the Kingdom, is not normal human behavior. Jesus instructed us to LOVE. Love God above all others, AND Love your neighbor as yourself. They don't love their own families, they don't love other JW's, and they definitely don't love their neighbors.
All they can do is remind each other to WORK harder and persevere past all the "persecution" they face. Remind each other that you are better than everyone else, and that someday soon you will be rewarded with Jehovah's revenge on all those around you, who just didn't make the grade.
