Memorial Attendance: The Single Most Impactful TTATT "Witness" to Family and Friends (page 2)

Laika

Well this pees me off, I am now convinced you are absolutely right but I have already promised to go and I don't like to break promises. I wish you'd posted this sooner!

Gypsy Sam

So true. That is why we aren't going for the first time this year :)

When I was a young JW teenager, I would see what I perceived to be the dregs of humanity shuffling into the Kingdom Hall on memorial night and I'd think to myself: "they know this is the right religion but they're too lazy or stupid to do the right thing and actually show up the rest of the time."

And later, on a similar theme: "Meetings aren't optional! They're not going to be saved on account of being here this one evening." Being dragged by my mother to every meeting without fail, I couldn't bear to think that someone might attain salvation by going to only one organised gathering per year.

The first point is really the key one, as the attendance of the masses at this event is like validation not only that the occasion has meaning, but that the entire doctrine into which it is woven is the one to which they subscribe.

baltar447

Last memorial 2011

Comatose

First memorial of my life I'll miss this year. Can't go. Don't believe, can't subject myself or my child to indoctrination. Family won't talk to me anyways... It's funny that JW family think the memorial is a magic bullet to protect you.

Maat13

Agreed non-attendance is key in convincing your spouse, family and congregation of your stance.

At my old hall they used to quietly take attendance of all of the publishers missing and present..any other halls like that?

Maat

LongHairGal

Amnesiano:

Yes, I agree with you. Anybody who only attends the memorial sends the (wrong) message to JWs that their religion is "right".

Unfortunately, many who only attend the memorial have family still in the religion and they are just making a good show of it to keep people quiet. Too bad they are unwittingly sending a wrong message to any onlookers!

This will be the third year I miss it. I felt anxiety before going and I always hated the feeling that I wanted to run out the door as soon as it was over. I was squirming in my seat. Couldn't stand the questions from phonies afterwards and idiots who were never my friends visually checking me out to see what I was wearing! Of course, I was always dressed well.

But, really, who needs this?

PaintedToeNail

As one who feels compelled to go to keep the peace in my family and not break my mother's heart, I too agree with what is posted above. While there, I know people will look at me with sympathy and ask how I've been. I plan on telling them that I have NEVER been better and that I feel great. Recently I've had a few people from the KH comment on my Facebook page about my new business and how great I look. Of course I look great!! I've stopped being filled with panic attacks, anxiety about armeggedon, anger at feeling required to go in service and report time. I'm calm now, don't beat myself up because I have to go in service. My nights are free and so is my heart. I'm enjoying my life and shows...that is the best revenge.

AMNESIANO

I couldn't resist a few additional thoughts.

While I steadfastly object to attending the Watchtower's annual Lord's Evening Meal precisely because of its sacred significance to Witnesses, I make a concerted effort to attend the funeral/memorial service for any of my former friends who die. Besides wanting to express my genuine condolences, I believe these to be critical opportunities to demonstrate emphatically that:

It is the WT organization and its leadership and teachings that I have rejected and not their victims
I am perfectly willing and able to enter a KH for that occasion which has meaning for me (which says obviously the Memorial does not)
I have not been "stumbled," nor am I depressed or in shame-faced, self-imposed seclusion
I have not left "the truth" in order to pursue a life of geriatric(!) debauchery
I am perfectly at peace, not for one moment believing in or in fear of some so-called wrath of Jehovah at Armageddon...or Harmageddon...or back to Armageddon again!
Finally, I have no desire or intention to ever return (which is another impression encouraged by Memorial attendance)

(By the way, I make it a point to always wear a pantsuit on these occasions. Always, without exception. I positively delight in the gasps and tsk-tsking that virtually ripple through the building! Again, message delivered--without utterance.)

Now, you may wonder if my strategies have netted any verifiable results, i.e., other escapées? While I have no empirical evidence I can produce to prove they have, I do have reasons to strongly suspect ( I won't disclose what they are--you'll just have to take my word for it) that my course has caused certain ones who knew me best to conclude that mine was a conscious decision deliberately made, one for which I have absolutely no regrets.

And they ponder the reason, which is all I intend. The rest is up to the individual.

As as for my husband, there is no mistaking the fact that he no longer believes the FDS--whoever they claim to be on any given day--has any unique or special standing with God or that JWs are "true Christians" in sole possession of some infallible "truth." For that I take unapologetic credit. H e stays in out of habit. Inertia mostly. It's his way in everything, not just religion --the course of least resistance. And, frankly, but for the occasional dust-up on the matter, I'm fine with it. Neither of us is young anymore so it's not like I've some great aspirations I am prevented pursuing because of his cult indoctrination. We each make concessions where willing and go our separate ways when we cannot or will not (as tonight when he'll be attending the Memorial, which I never ever will do again).

Again, respectfully, I believe it possible to convey a distinct, unambiguous message to thinking Witnesses, given their unique indoctrination and JW-centric world view, only by rejecting the entirety of their dogma and rituals, especially their one and only sacred and most holy ritual. Any appearance of "nibbling" at Jehovah's so-called "spiritual table" garbles your message disastrously, demeans you and squanders a precious opportunity.

AMNESIAN

Captive 7/1972 - 2/2001

Last Memorial attendance: April 8, 2001

Memorial Attendance: The Single Most Impactful TTATT "Witness" to Family and Friends

cantleave