by James Jackson 32 Replies latest members private
I have a different perspective. I consider my life a gift. If this is all there is, my response is to say thank you and I will do everything I can to cherish every moment of the gift.
Wanting something beyond what we have is like the spoiled child, who after opening all his Christmas presents start crying: "is this all there is?"
No, according to Jesus Christ, who said;
"I am the resurrection and the life. He who believes in me, though he were dead, yet shall he live: And whoever lives and believes in me shall never die." John 11:25, 26
Altho you were in thirty years, it is not a lifetime
I, like James Jackson, was in over thirty years, but it IS a lifetime because any future life I have will not be what it could have been had I not been a JW. My being a JW has permanently crippled me. I had a lot of ability, but because of being a JW I will be working menial jobs for extremely low pay as long as I'm physically able. I will never be able to retire - no pension, no 401K, no anything that would allow me to even think about retiring. Some might say 'Well you can start now. Start over and get a better job.' Start now - at my age? And compete with 22-year-olds fresh out of college with nice degrees? What am I going to put on a resume? Am I to list all the menial work I've done - cutting grass, cleaning windows, digging out septic tanks, etc.? If I could get an interview, I might fare well, but it's not like the old days. You can't see potential employers in person anymore unless they've screened you on paper first and then chosen to interview you based on that. I don't look good on paper.
So every day of my life I wake up in the morn and am slapped in the face by the life that the org led me to. I recently talked with an old school friend who was shocked when I told him how much money I make. He said 'but you could have done anything; you were intelligent and popular, you caught on to hard stuff quickly, etc.' He knows about my JW life and current feelings about JWs. He even studied a little bit. He told me how much his 29-yr-old son makes. The son works at a local electrical supply house writing up job bids. Believe me, the son is nothing special at all. However, he makes more than me and my wife put together.
This friend also told me about a mutual school friend of ours. He has just retired (mid 50's) and make more in retirement than me and my wife put together. This mutual friend's wife is still working (some kind of nurse) and she makes more than me and my wife together.
When I took an aptitude/intelligence test to get into a private school the summer after the 5th grade, the school headmaster told my mother that I could do anything I wanted in life. That's exactly what he said. Little did he know that I was a JW.
So this life might be all there is, but I don't even get to enjoy "this life" because of my having been a JW. It makes me and my wife furious at times to think about it.
Sorry for the rant.
Some things to consider:
1. Why bother to ask (other than to promote the religion) if this life is all there is? Who can say they really have the answer? How would someone get the real answer unless they either 1.) Have lived some other "life" and come to talk about it, or 2.) Have lived this life and died...in which case they wouldn't be back to tell us 'cause there'd be nothing once they died! If anyone knows the name of that particular type of logical fallacy, please post it, and thank you.
2.) People who say that WT/JW's ruined their existence are talking through their hats. They have nooooo idea whether another lifestyle would have brought them more, less, or the same happiness or sorrow, you know, "the grass is greener" and all that? Grow up! WT/JW lives have their bad points but have good points as well. No matter how much pain WT/JW's have inflicted on someone, "The World" can match it several different ways. To say that WT did someone wrong is like saying that on their own, these complainers (or their parents in the case of born ins) could have chosen the perfect, ideal life for themselves. Yeah, right! For the record, I'm one of the people WT/JW's hurt, and it took many long years to work my way through it. At the same time, I knew people who were in as bad a shape as I was, and their troubles had nothing to do with WT/JW's. In the long run, who cares who did what to whom? What really matters is finding a way to get out of the situation, then building a more informed life.
AB
I have been a Witness for over 30 years, and all my dreams are fading away.
A Good friend of mine for all these years told me the other day that, He is resigned to the fact that he is going to die in this "System Of Things".
Really???
I've been watching now for 61 years.
No one gets out alive. All my grand parents are dead, my fathers dead, my mothers got alzhimers.
My dreams started fading after I was a witness for about 30 years back in the early 80's.
I don't know If I would have had a better life or not, if I never heard of the JW's.
I was born and raised as one and JW stinking thinking effected a lot of what I thought and did for the
first 30 years of my life.
But I don't know how my life would have turned out, If I did not have someone and someting
to blame all the bad and all the dissapointments on.
Like my Army drill Sgt. friend tells me trials, dissapointments and hard times build character.
I tell him, I'm a character all right.
I will never be able to retire - no pension, no 401K, no anything that would allow me to even think about retiring.
I think this is the real tragedy. As a JW we were encouraged to "just get a job" and so many of us did. JWs see little value in financial planning or retirement planning under the idea that Jehoober will take care of them anyday now.
So while many of the "worldly" people are able to retire fairly early and actually enjoy the twilight of their lives in comfort, JWs work all of their lives well into their older years, while they hold on to the paradise bubble hope which will never happen.
Result? Living sub-par lives during this "system of things", in hope of making it to something that will never exist.
People who say that WT/JW's ruined their existence are talking through their hats. They have nooooo idea whether another lifestyle would have brought them more, less, or the same happiness or sorrow, you know, "the grass is greener" and all that? Grow up! WT/JW lives have their bad points but have good points as well. No matter how much pain WT/JW's have inflicted on someone, "The World" can match it several different ways. To say that WT did someone wrong is like saying that on their own, these complainers (or their parents in the case of born ins) could have chosen the perfect, ideal life for themselves. Yeah, right! For the record, I'm one of the people WT/JW's hurt, and it took many long years to work my way through it. At the same time, I knew people who were in as bad a shape as I was, and their troubles had nothing to do with WT/JW's. In the long run, who cares who did what to whom? What really matters is finding a way to get out of the situation, then building a more informed life.
How can you possibly say that "they have nooooo idea whether another lifestyle would have brought them more, less, or the same happiness or sorrow"? I didn't say anything about happiness or sorrow. I said JWs robbed me of this life because I will have to work until I physically can't. I am happy. I love life. I have many interests. But I have very little little income and no chance of ever, ever, ever retiring. I sit at the local travel center eating lunch and watching the retired travelers stop to fuel up, stretch, etc. and I dream of being able to travel. I love it, but watching them is as close as I'll ever get to retiring and traveling.
About twelve years ago my wife turned down a very good job offer that would have paid her more than we both make now. It would have provided health care for both of us, retirement, etc. She turned it down so we could start back pioneering. I have turned down many job opportunities, schooling opportunities, etc. because of being a JW. You are absolutely wrong. My life would be easier & better if I hadn't been deceived by JWs.
Money might not bring happiness, but it damn sure makes life easier. I have to do everything I can myself because I can't afford to pay to have it done - all car repairs, etc. We spend a lot of time just trying to figure out how to get things done when if I had the money I could pay to have them done. Our lives have been extremely difficult because we sacrificed and suffered being JWs. Hell, we literally lived in a damned ragged old barn for five years - with no heat and very poor AC. Two people in a 12x20 foot room. That includes the bathroom, kitchen, and closet.
Don't tell me I "have noooo idea". I have a damned good idea and could write a book about it and argue it with you all day. You touched a nerve with me.
I have cats that I dearly love and have had some die in my arms as I cried because I had no money to pay for vet bills and the local JWs don't give a damn. I have done lots of research and ordered meds from overseas to try to treat them myself. Don't tell me I have no idea whether my life would be different if I hadn't been a JW.
The first twelve or fifteen years of our marriage, we refused to get credit cards because we, per JW training, were trying to live simply and thought the end was coming any second. Well, when our cheap old car died, we were on foot. We borrowed an old family vehicle to go car shopping. We went to a low-class used car dealer and were told that we had zero credit history and couldn't buy a car from them. We had to keep borrowing that old ragged vehicle until we saved $1400 and were able to buy an old station wagon with 199,000 miles on it.
Again, don't tell me I don't know whether my life would have been different. I was always at the top of my class in high school and college. I was voted best all-around male in my high school senior class. I could have had decent money now, but instead I suffer. I can't even coordinate my days off with my wife's. We rarely have time together.
Twenty & thirty years ago I warned my closest non-JW friends that the world was coming to an end soon and they would all die if they didn't become JWs. They all questioned why I was doing menial work. Not one of them was anywhere close to me in intelligence and academic ability and they knew it. Yet, now, one is retired making more in his retirement than my wife and I now make together working hard jobs full-time, and all the others probably make at least four times what my wife and I make together. And that's not even considering what their wives make.
It is 100% because of being a JW that I'm in this position. I know for a fact. You're wrong.
This to me is the biggest tragedy that JWism spawns. Mortgaging away your precious life, here and now the only one you've got in exchange for a future that will never happen. I hear JWs all the time say about travel, housing, health and more: oh it can wait till the new world. It's so sad that JWs have been scammed out of their already too short lives. My dad is in this position. He is almost 60, recently laid off and uneducated. No retirement or money and my mom refuses to work. He scours the news daily looking for some sign Armageddon is imminent. He always talks about how he cant wait for this system to end, how we really need it. The whole concept of being a good JW is self deprivation now, for a future reward. In reality they are wasting their precious short lives in dead end jobs, pioneering and meetings. Before they know it, they are old. They were promised they would never grow old, but they do. They were promised they may never die, but they do. What a waste. A true tragedy millions of times over.
