Family Lost- Dealing with the "Inevitable" (page 2)

WhoYourDaddy

You can't change the past. Live your life. This is a vicious cult. Leave it as fast as you can.

I get that. My mother was a very difficult person, I had never really been a good enough JW for her. Most of my siblings were disfellowshipped or didn't attend, so you would think she would be at least a little happy that I was still a JW, even if I wasn't super zealous, but no. She couldn't enjoy visits because she was constantly looking for signs of my failure as a dub. I though she would be upset when I finally walked away, but the truth was she had already written me off.

I went to see my her the year she died. We had a pretty good visit, but then she sent me a letter saying she wouldn't talk to me anymore. She died a few months later. I just felt indifferent when I got the news. It's hard to grieve over a relationship that didn't exist, by her choice. I went to her memorial, but felt nothing. What a wacky religion, I couldn't be with my mom when she died, but I was allowed to attend a Watchtower boasting session after she was dead and it didn't matter anymore.

This religion destroys families.

Oubliette

Oh the irony!

Jehovah's Witnesses use this scripture to "prove" we are in the "last days" because of the alleged behavior of people outside of their religion. But in reality, they fit the description as well as anyone, maybe even more so.

2 Timothy 3:1 - 7: But know this, that in the last days critical times hard to deal with will be here. 2 For men will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boastful, haughty, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, disloyal, 3 having no natural affection, not open to any agreement, slanderers, without self-control, fierce, without love of goodness, 4 betrayers, headstrong, puffed up with pride, lovers of pleasures rather than lovers of God, 5 having an appearance of godliness but proving false to its power; and from these turn away. 6 From among these arise men who slyly work their way into households and captivate weak women loaded down with sins, led by various desires, 7 always learning and yet never able to come to an accurate knowledge of truth.

--

NewYork44M

It sounds like you have already mourned her loss due to the exclusion caused by the cult.

humbled

NewYork44M,

I do think it's like that. You have already had to accept their loss. The grieving has past.

My clue was from my non-JW husband whose mother YEARS ago moved across the country to be near her only daughter and then dried up as far as her two sons and their families were concerned. She had so completely dried up that when my husband drove to California to help clear out her house (daughter had died), her neighbors were shocked to learn she had sons--she never mentioned them.

She had money to travel--the sons and families scraped to get by. She had her own world.

Theirs was a grief passed before she died.

BU2B

So sad what this cult and all others do to people.. Sadistic cult :(

seeing_me

It's such a complicated situation. Once you pass the grief period - which in itself is difficult because it isnt a normal grief of losing someone in death. But the fact that you can still possibly run-in or hear from them at any moment. After this than yes I do feel you lose that connection with them. Your relationship is severed and often the brutal treatment and experience turns you off from even wanting to be close to such members.

Let's hope your mum and step dad see the light before you get any phone calls as such :)

KateWild

Welcome to the board seeing_me. What's your story, you can start a thread and tell us all about yourself. Kate xx

Oub, You make a good point about 2Ti 3.1-7. I often thought the same thing when I was in, seeing all the hypocrisy. So true Oub, so true. Kate xx

Family Lost- Dealing with the "Inevitable"